Guest guest Posted March 23, 2008 Report Share Posted March 23, 2008 I've missed you all so very much and I'm sorry I haven't checked in in such a long time. So much has happened since the beginning on the new year I really haven't been on the computer or felt like doing much of anything. My health has been good except for a bout with trachealarynobronchitis. Say THAT 5 times fast, I dare you, lol!!! It lasted for almost 2 weeks and wiped me right out, needless to say. had to use some time from work to stay home cuz I could barely get out of bed, so tired and run down, which is what got me there in the first place. Right now all is going well, fingers crossed! Hubby is still working downstate at Bedford Hills (womens prison) hoping to move to Greene C.F. which is only an hour and half away from home. We are going to have to attend therapy sessions when he returns because he has gotten used to the " bachelor " life if you want to call it that, and Alcia and I have gotten very good at acting as a team. He pretty much comes home and plops, plays games on the computer, and watches tv. I know he works hard and works overtime when he can, but when he doesn't he plops in his room there and watches tv!!! He really has never been one for hard labor!! Zack is doing ok. He is on a new medication for the ADHD. Concerta ER, 18 mg. Not seeing much of a difference yet, today was his third dose, don't know exactly if it's supposed to kick right in or not. Other than that, he is pretty much the same except that he is girl crazy. I seem to have a little casanova on my hands. Likes to kiss the girls!!!! He's 5! Lord help me! Haven't heard ONE word from s side of the family, no surprise there. We did receive an invite to his Gramma's 90th birthday party which is in W. Va. on 4/26 which also happens to be our 22nd wedding anniversary. Not sure if we are going because of the stress in the family. I certainly won't be able to hold my tongue and don't need the extra aggravation, also not sure about the finances and if will be able to get the time off. My sisters, their daughters, and I are going on a cruise in 22 days to the Western Carribean!! I can't wait to go, but am terrified to fly. Haven't been on a plane since 1986!!! Had a kind of bombshell dropped on us the day after turned 18 (Jan. 14th). Her and her b/f, Carmen had been broken up and he was pretty much stalking her, calling and texting her constantly to the point that I had to threaten him with calling his Mom or the police. He was actually more afraid of his Mom, believe it or not. We had to change her cell phone number and the whole nine yards. Well this boy who " supposedly " loves her threatened that if she didn't go back out with her that he would tell everyone her deepest, darkest secret, which of course we didn't know. So Jan. 15th she calls me into her bedroom and asks me to close the door and says and I quote, " Mom, I have to tell you something and I don't want you to get mad. " Ok, so I know it's not going to be good, a good conversation never starts out like that, right? I just asked her what it was. She tells me that when she was 15, this was about 4- 6 months after the rape, she was at a party, got drunk, smoked pot for the first time(which I DO believe), slept with some boy named Steve?, got pregnant and 3 months later had an abortion. Well, I don't have to tell you the first thing I felt was, " I must be dreaming. " Then I was sick to my stomach, then I felt the room spinning while I held onto her doorknob and desk. I don't know who or what kept me from falling. I had to put my hand over my mouth to muffle my cries. Then she tells me that she doesn't want her father to know!!! Well, that I can't agree with. I ask her why she didn't come to us then and she said she was scared because we had just gone through the whole rape thing with her. We would have understood better then I explained to her because we knew that girls who have been raped sometimes get more permiscuous right after. I really felt hurt that she didn't feel she could trust us after we HAD stood by her through that whole time. We have never given her any reason NOT to trust us or think that we would ever turn our backs on her. She said that she was actually GLAD that he threatened to tell because she wanted to get it out in the open and that she was going to tell us someday she just didn't know when. I'm not sure I believe that she ever would have told us at all if he hadn't have threatened her. She told me that it was her body and her decision to make and she made the " adult " decision. I am pro choice, but I would have liked to be included on this decision. I'm sure we would have agreed with her decision, she was only 15, but there will always be a part of me that will wonder. I also question her choice of words, " adult " decision. The " adult " decision would have been to not be in the situation in the first place, to not have unprotected sex, and to have come to US alot sooner. The kicker is...she is back with the boy who was ready to tell this secret to the world!!! I am really having a hard time with this fact. I try to be cordial and civil to him but it is very hard. She keeps saying that his family accepts the fact that they are back together and I have to reming her that HIS family has NO clue what the whole story is. They may change their minds if they did know. They still argue every day, several times a day, he calls her constantly or texts her wanting to know her every move, even when she is home with me!!! I really am a pretty good judge of character. I can tell what type of person you are the first time I meet you and I'm usually right and I just was rubbed the wrong way with this boy and so far his track record hasn't done anything but prove me right. It's so hard to sit back and watch your daughter tolerate this treatment, profess her love and tell me that she plans someday to marry this boy. Also she took a nasty fall at work on 2/24 on some ice as she was leaving the building and has been out of work since then and has had constant headaches and pain in her back, neck and shoulders. Nothing broken. A concussion and very badly bruised muscles and bones. She is going to P/T 2 times a week but they have not even started her on any exercises yet. They suggested getting a back brace for her! Now her workplace's insurance company is telling her that she is not qualifying for comp pay because she is able to go to school so she should be able to work! She can't lift people, push people, squat, turn her neck barely and lives with constant headaches. She goes to school from 7:30-12 and is in her senior year and has 3 1/2 months left! She wants to be an RN and we aren't risking that so she can work 1 night a week and every weekend! She is soooo upset. We are definately fighting it though and hopefully will win so she can at least get the wages she has missed. Well, I'm sorry this turned into a book, I guess that's what happens when you are away for months. I can't believe its been that long. I've missed you all so much. I hope everyone is feeling well and Spring is in bloom where you are! Old man Winter still has his icy grasp on us here in NY. Many, many hugs, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 15, 2008 Report Share Posted May 15, 2008 Hi ~ If you have enough work credits and feel the need to get disability, I would certainly try again. I, myself am caught in a catch 22 situation. Can't work, don't have enough work credits, and husband makes too much money. Can't get disability or SSI. A real bummer. But, I blame it all on my own ignorance. Should have done my homework years ago. Like you, I used to suffer from severe insomnia. But, like you said, not everything is MS. Mine came from living in a toxic home. I was being poisoned. When I left and moved to a different place, I was once again able to get a good nights sleep. I used to be on Ambien, Lunesta, and all kinds of OTC meds. And I had to take them every night. I haven't had to take those meds is several months. I get up early and retire late, but am still able to get at least seven hours sleep every night. I feel so much better. Stress is probably one of the worst things for MS. And it doesn't have to be negative. Too much of good thing can be just as bad. The trick is, is try to be a stress free as possible. And I know... easier said than done. Wish I could be more help to you. I'm really not much help to anyone. Just wanted you to know that you're not alone out there. And I do know what you are saying. I hope you have a great day and may you be blessed. Love and blessings... Val <*)))>< http://www.happytrailsfarm.us Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne. ~Quentin Crisp~ Subject: hello everyoneTo: MSersLife Date: Thursday, May 15, 2008, 6:14 PM Well, I haven't been visiting in some time.I am a "true" lurker here though.I have RRMS...been diagnosed since 1989.I haven't had too many "difficult" exacerbations in some time. It is a relief.I had been a stay at home mom for 17 years and went to work as a teacher for 2 years and then as an accountant for 2 1/2 years. You got it, when i increased the stress of my life...with the jobs...I exacerbated repeatedly. So, I "semi-retired" and I am now at home. My 3 girls are all out of the house and no longer my concern. Changes since I quit working...well. ..I opted for a complete hysterectomy due to fibroid problems...good decision...it enabled me to avoid future problems that would possibly exacerbate my condition.Second...discovered that falls I was having was due to a knee problem, had surgery and I no longer fell...Not everything is MS. Had gall bladder surgery in 2006 and I am happy to say I am "free" of the need for major surgical procedures. I do have a skin cancer mohs surgery scheduled for later this month...but it does look as if I am in the clear as far as needing anything else. I am not on Social Security Disability.. .and I went through the process to get it in 2006. I am debating going for it again...it is difficult. I ran from place to place only to have "someone" out there decide I could work if I wished. I have been told to apply again...my sister in law had to pay a lawyer to get her SSDI. I would guess, yes, I should apply, but it is hard to think that I should when my husband makes a good income. (This is totally open for discussion gang....give me your opinion.?)Another question...how do you "sleep"? I feel like I am fighting...I am tired...I get to bed, and I tense up from head to toe. I do have an open prescription for ambien...but is it really necessary to be on that the rest of my life?Peace to everyone... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2008 Report Share Posted May 18, 2008 Hi ! What a great surprise to see you! ) I don't know just how I sleep, but I'm thinking it's not as well as I *should* be. Maybe even moreso lately? HUGS, Challis hello everyone Well, I haven't been visiting in some time.I am a "true" lurker here though.I have RRMS...been diagnosed since 1989.I haven't had too many "difficult" exacerbations in some time. It is a relief.I had been a stay at home mom for 17 years and went to work as a teacher for 2 years and then as an accountant for 2 1/2 years. You got it, when i increased the stress of my life...with the jobs...I exacerbated repeatedly. So, I "semi-retired" and I am now at home. My 3 girls are all out of the house and no longer my concern. Changes since I quit working...well. ..I opted for a complete hysterectomy due to fibroid problems...good decision...it enabled me to avoid future problems that would possibly exacerbate my condition.Second...discovered that falls I was having was due to a knee problem, had surgery and I no longer fell...Not everything is MS. Had gall bladder surgery in 2006 and I am happy to say I am "free" of the need for major surgical procedures. I do have a skin cancer mohs surgery scheduled for later this month...but it does look as if I am in the clear as far as needing anything else. I am not on Social Security Disability.. .and I went through the process to get it in 2006. I am debating going for it again...it is difficult. I ran from place to place only to have "someone" out there decide I could work if I wished. I have been told to apply again...my sister in law had to pay a lawyer to get her SSDI. I would guess, yes, I should apply, but it is hard to think that I should when my husband makes a good income. (This is totally open for discussion gang....give me your opinion.?)Another question...how do you "sleep"? I feel like I am fighting...I am tired...I get to bed, and I tense up from head to toe. I do have an open prescription for ambien...but is it really necessary to be on that the rest of my life?Peace to everyone... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2008 Report Share Posted May 18, 2008 Hi ! What a great surprise to see you! ) I don't know just how I sleep, but I'm thinking it's not as well as I *should* be. Maybe even moreso lately? HUGS, Challis hello everyone Well, I haven't been visiting in some time.I am a "true" lurker here though.I have RRMS...been diagnosed since 1989.I haven't had too many "difficult" exacerbations in some time. It is a relief.I had been a stay at home mom for 17 years and went to work as a teacher for 2 years and then as an accountant for 2 1/2 years. You got it, when i increased the stress of my life...with the jobs...I exacerbated repeatedly. So, I "semi-retired" and I am now at home. My 3 girls are all out of the house and no longer my concern. Changes since I quit working...well. ..I opted for a complete hysterectomy due to fibroid problems...good decision...it enabled me to avoid future problems that would possibly exacerbate my condition.Second...discovered that falls I was having was due to a knee problem, had surgery and I no longer fell...Not everything is MS. Had gall bladder surgery in 2006 and I am happy to say I am "free" of the need for major surgical procedures. I do have a skin cancer mohs surgery scheduled for later this month...but it does look as if I am in the clear as far as needing anything else. I am not on Social Security Disability.. .and I went through the process to get it in 2006. I am debating going for it again...it is difficult. I ran from place to place only to have "someone" out there decide I could work if I wished. I have been told to apply again...my sister in law had to pay a lawyer to get her SSDI. I would guess, yes, I should apply, but it is hard to think that I should when my husband makes a good income. (This is totally open for discussion gang....give me your opinion.?)Another question...how do you "sleep"? I feel like I am fighting...I am tired...I get to bed, and I tense up from head to toe. I do have an open prescription for ambien...but is it really necessary to be on that the rest of my life?Peace to everyone... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2008 Report Share Posted May 18, 2008 Hi ! What a great surprise to see you! ) I don't know just how I sleep, but I'm thinking it's not as well as I *should* be. Maybe even moreso lately? HUGS, Challis hello everyone Well, I haven't been visiting in some time.I am a "true" lurker here though.I have RRMS...been diagnosed since 1989.I haven't had too many "difficult" exacerbations in some time. It is a relief.I had been a stay at home mom for 17 years and went to work as a teacher for 2 years and then as an accountant for 2 1/2 years. You got it, when i increased the stress of my life...with the jobs...I exacerbated repeatedly. So, I "semi-retired" and I am now at home. My 3 girls are all out of the house and no longer my concern. Changes since I quit working...well. ..I opted for a complete hysterectomy due to fibroid problems...good decision...it enabled me to avoid future problems that would possibly exacerbate my condition.Second...discovered that falls I was having was due to a knee problem, had surgery and I no longer fell...Not everything is MS. Had gall bladder surgery in 2006 and I am happy to say I am "free" of the need for major surgical procedures. I do have a skin cancer mohs surgery scheduled for later this month...but it does look as if I am in the clear as far as needing anything else. I am not on Social Security Disability.. .and I went through the process to get it in 2006. I am debating going for it again...it is difficult. I ran from place to place only to have "someone" out there decide I could work if I wished. I have been told to apply again...my sister in law had to pay a lawyer to get her SSDI. I would guess, yes, I should apply, but it is hard to think that I should when my husband makes a good income. (This is totally open for discussion gang....give me your opinion.?)Another question...how do you "sleep"? I feel like I am fighting...I am tired...I get to bed, and I tense up from head to toe. I do have an open prescription for ambien...but is it really necessary to be on that the rest of my life?Peace to everyone... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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