Feel like a Bad Mom...

[Guest guest]

I called the Mayo Clinic and I may not fit their criteria to be a patient

there for my AVN (Avascular Necrosis... dying bones) they will get back to

me in 7-10 days after they look at my name basically in their review

committee. They didn't ask for any records, MRIs, Xrays, etc so I am not

sure what the review committee is going to review other than my name?

The next closest places that specialize in treating it are Duke or

somewhere else in Baltimore. I can't afford to drive to Duluth which is

less than 200 miles away... how can I afford to go to the East Coast?

I did call and make an appt for Wednesday with my current orthopedic surgeon

and Terry is going to leave work to come with me because no one is

listening me or helping me with the pain. So until then I guess I am

staying bed until then... how can I be a Mom and not be able to walk the

length of my trailer without extreme pain and then basically crying myself

to sleep?

[Guest guest]

i am sure you are a great mom, and you don't need to walk to be that. there is

so much more. teaching them empathy for a starter. prayers coming your way.

Cathie in Ct

> Anne R wrote:

> how can I be a Mom and not be able to walk the length of my trailer without

extreme pain and then basically crying myself to sleep?

[Guest guest]

Anne.

Being male I can't say I know how you feel but I do know how it feels to be a

bad dad.

Most of the time I feel so useless, incapable and a bad parent.

I hate it when I can't do things for the kids that need doing.

I hate it when I can't do the housework to keep the place clean, tidy and safe

for them.

I hate it when I CAN do bits and the kids are there 'cause I just hate myself

and get angry at everything and everyone and sometimes this includes the kids.

It's a horrible feeling, or feelings, but you have to understand that with a bit

of luck this will be a passing phase, at least I hope to hell it is!

You are not a bad mum, just a mum in pain.

Sometimes it helps to know sometimes it doesn't but anyway, I know a number of

people on here, just like me, feel your pain. You are not alone hun.

Ken.

[Guest guest]

Anne,

Keep on making noise to your doctor, be firm.  You are entitled to be treated

for your pain and your disease. 

I don't know enough about your illness to advise you but if you can find others

who are dealing with it and have doctors who are helping, or can advise you who

to contact, that should help somewhat.

I understand about traveling to see specialists and don't have any idea how I

would find a way to go far from home for any length of time.  We barely can

afford to drive to our specialists now and they are less than 60 miles from

home.

I just know you will find help if you keep seeking.

Jennette

[Guest guest]

The ONLY thing i'm grateful about my pain is that when i was injured my daughter

was older. I raised her from a very young age to cook, clean, laundry (she

actually likes to do laundry, huh?) as i worked long 12hr night shifts most of

her life.

Now that i can no longer do things around the house my daughter has taken over.

She is 24yrs old and a really good, responsible young woman.

You are NOT a bad mother, just another person in pain who has children. Start

now be allowing your children do little things for you like, getting you

something to drink, or a book, or a snack (if they're old enough that is) Kids

usually like to help and this will only help with bonding between you and your

kids.