Re: in shock/Jennette

[Guest guest]

Jennette,

I recently read an article on repressed feelings and pain manifesting in the

body. My Mother used to get up in the middle of the night and say " I am leaving

your Dad " I guess I became immune to it outwardly, but repressed it and I don't

want to bring that out.

I was telling my Sister I don't remember much of my childhood, but people say I

was always happy and positive, I guess it was that I couldn't do anything about

the situation, I just should be happy.

I lived in the same environment as you except my Dad did not have bad health and

has been mostly healthy alll his life. He is 94 now and just now " down in his

back " although he couldn't understand my back pain and told me if I just had

stronger will I could overcome the pain and not have to take that " dope " .

Funny he takes it also and he feels pain like I do now. He worked but would

work out of town and my Mother had to take care of everything, the farm, cows,

and we were left to fend for ourselves while he was being " important " and he

went out with the guys and would brag about the women that tried to chase him.

He is chauvinistic and everything is his way and he is right about everything.

I do not look forward to probating his will but my older sister has already told

me if I get the land with the pond, I have to pay more, and she is sucking up to

my middle sister as she wants to buy my middle sister out and my Daddy thinks as

Executor I can tell them what to do but I am there to follow his wishes. My

sisters are sneaky and don't put things out in the open but expect me to.

I told them I would not ask for five per cent as allowed by law being Executor,

but I am beginning to think how I have been done and my part is being taken

away, all is fair in love and war.

My middle sister thinks she can go down in ten days and give the judge a copy of

the death certificate and get her money. She also is wanting the checking

account to have three daughter names on it when Dad's checking account is only

to be used to settle his estate.

She is very greedy and says " I can't wait until he dies " She is being paid to go

over daily and make sure he is eating, drive him to town etc, but my Dad has to

tell you how to drive, which way to go, etc even though there are other ways. I

just let him do it and in my head I am ignoring him. I have been taught yes sir

no sir and if anything breaks or something happens, he blames it on other

people. He is very sad and to see him old and shrunken and trying to deal with

his life and he just talks about how wonderful he was and how he has given to

the world and never say he has good daughters and he is narcissistic. He has

never said I love you, I have to say it and he never says I am so proud of you

and what you have done in life. It is a sad situation that parents cannot do

this and I do know it has effected me. I cannot stand verbal abuse. I am sorry

you had to go through this also, Jenette.

You can always vent to me. Bennie

[Guest guest]

Authors Louise Hay, Ann on, joyce Mayer (sp?) And Dr. Wayne Dyer all

have amazing books, cds and dvds you can get at the library (if not at tour

branch, the library can order it for you to borrow.

These authors offer conclusive proof on the power of living in the now and

creating positive to flow into your lives.

Very empowering. It has been scientifically proven that repressed feelings,

anger, depression, unhealthy relations, etc. makes pain and illness worse. Same

with " A Course on Miracles. "

The moment of power is in the now. Whatever you most think about you will get

more of.