Re: light at the end of the tunnel...

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

You are a very brave woman. Your daughter will be proud of you and she is lucky

to have a mother like you. I understand the guilt you are going through. We have

been trained since infancy to feel guilty for thinking and caring about

ourselves, so it is only natural.

However, it sounds like you have already created a better environment for your

child to grow up in and you will better be able to nurture her without feeling

the stresses your Nada could bring.

Maybe later you will know what to do. For now, you are learning your boundaries.

Stay well.

Joy

>

> so it's been a year since my nada went NC on me. I started with pain ( " how

could she abandon me? " I was pregnant w/her first and only granddaughter and

have given birth, which she hasn't acknowledged), then moved to anger ( " Screw

you for abandoning me " ), then guilt ( " How can I not be in contact w/my mother? "

what kind of person doesn't talk to her mother? " ) and now....am starting to feel

some peace. I'm ok w/her not in my life, and if she's going to ever be in my

life again, she will need to reach out to me with an apology on her lips and a

commitment to make some changes (that will never happen). Anyway, just wanted

to say that progress can be made, and once you get some distance from your nada,

it becomes easier to expect/require them to treat you at least civilly if they

want to be in your life.

>