Memory Lane

[Guest guest]

Hi All

Today, I've been thinking a great deal about the one amazing person, who

profoundly changed my life. All these years later, the way she lived and

died, continues to affect the way I behave; right down to how I react to

living with my own disabilities that get more serious and painful by the

day.

Back in November of 1965, I had just turned thirteen. Since I was

finally old enough to volunteer in an adult capacity, I decided to

volunteer at the Catholic nursing home in our little city. It was only a

mile from our house, so I wasn't dependent on rides or buses. I either

ran or walked everywhere in those days.

There was an elderly lady in the nursing home, who became my heroine.

She was 70 and had Type 1 diabetes. We called in Juvenile Diabetes back

then. Of course, in those days, Type 1 Diabetes usually led to a fairly

young death. But, from the time she was diagnosed at fourteen, she made

it her goal to eat well, work hard, and get lots of fresh air and

exercise. She never drank alcohol or smoked and kept a very positive

outlook on life. She even managed to marry, work hard on the farm, and

bear and raise three children. Even with all that, her almost lifelong

diabetes eventually caught up with her.

By the time I met her, she was 74 years old and totally blind. She had

recently had both legs amputated just below the hip and her right arm

amputated just above the elbow.

But, she maintained her amazing outlook on life and on people. Of

course, loosing her dominate arm/hand and going blind all in the same

month, meant she couldn't do a very good job of feeding herself. So, on

the days I was there, she always asked for me to be the one to help feed

her. We bonded very quickly.

My Mum soon agreed to let me go over to the nursing home, every evening

at suppertime, so I could help my wonderful friend eat. I even walked

the mile at 40 below and never thought a thing about it. (We northern

Canadians are a tough lot. :-)

Then came the day, about six months into our very close friendship, when

she told me very gently that it was time for her to stop eating. She

said that she was finally too tired to go on and she wanted to die

peacefully. It wasn't anything dramatic, just kind and factual. I was

one startled kid. But, I stuck with her, day after day, helping her sip

black tea or juice, instead of eating a meal. I instinctively knew not

to plead with her to eat. She remained gracious and concerned with

others, even as she faded to a wisp. She died one afternoon while I was

at school. I think I took it harder than her remaining far flung family

members did.

To this day, I can still see her laughing and telling me how delicious

the beet greens she was eating were. She said any food that she didn't

have too cook, was extra nice to eat.

I wish everyone could have someone like that in their youth. She made

so much difference to me and to my teenage typically self centred attitude.

She died 46 years ago today.

I've yet to meet another person as gracious as she.

Lyndi