nada prevents me from taking care of my health

[Guest guest]

I can tell from many of the messages (and the topic on health issues) that many

of you have also had chronic illnesses. I started getting migraines when I was 8

and by the time I was 24 they were completely debilitating. My fada was my only

doctor so he put me on a new medication although he is not a neurologist. I had

so many side effects and literally don't remember two years of my life. I felt

like I had a stroke, although thank god, after I stopped the meds things are

better. I finally got my own neurologist after tons of fighting with nada (she's

the decision maker). She still scolds me when she receives doctor bills but I

need treatment! I don't know what she expects me to do about that.

I'm now facing my other major health issue- I have an autoimmune disease of the

eyes. Again, nada completely interfered and made me return home to see my fada's

friend when all of this happened. He basically told me he didn't know if I would

get my sight back (I became legally blind) and left it at that (it did return,

thank god!!). Several years later I *finally had good health insurance and

started seeing an ophthalmologist in NY. When I began seeing him he was

*shocked* at how negligent my first doctor was and how things could have been

taken care of in a much better way. I continued to see my ophthalmologist after

I left that job and lost health insurance. My nada continuously complained about

the bills and I tried to explain to her how I am trying to prevent losing my

sight- any amount of money seems worth it! Unfortunately after that I returned

home for grad school and was completely financially dependent on nada and fada.

Since then, nada has been explicitly threatening me to not see an

ophthalmologist and saying she refuses to pay for any of those bills. I now have

my own savings account and even though I don't want to dip into my savings I

made an appt to see an ophthalmologist. I am really afraid of what she will say-

from a doctor's perspective I should have been seeing one every month although I

haven't seen one for 5 years. I am not trying to shirk my responsibility as a

patient but I don't know how to explain concisely that I couldn't control the

situation. I know it seems silly to be worried about it, but I have gotten

lectured every single time I see an ophthalmologist. And then they usually look

at my eyes and tell me they still look like they are chemically burned and

there's no hope. Needless to say I usually get very emotional at these visits

and I don't know what I can do to start off on the right foot with this doctor.

Any suggestions??