I just think you need to know

[Guest guest]

A few other threads woke this one up in me. One of nada s most enraging

behaviors started or ended with the words, I just thought you needed to

know.

She would tell me for the umpteenth time, about my Dad s sexual

preferences and affairs. She would tell me about her own gynocological

issues. I won t go into detail, but suffice it to say I had nothing

left to my imagination. She did this to me from the time I was 10,

until I was 53, a few weeks before she died.

She used to enrage me with it, until I finally set a boundary that

anytime you start to talk about that stuff the conversation is over. I

had to enforce it many times and walk away from her. Sort of LC caused

by her refusal to live by the rules.

She would use this often if she wanted to deflect the conversation away

from her and her current craziness. I think she would also use it to

punish me if I displeased her. And until I set boundaries about it, she

would use it to press me until I was raging at her, despite begging her

repeatedly as she doggedly pressed on to please stop, I don t want to

hear this, I don t want to hear about that subject coming from my own

mother! And as she pressed on until I was raging, her justification

was:

I just thought you needed to know this about _______________ your

mother, your father. Ect.

Once I was raging, she won. She would tear up, drop the subject and

instantly the subject became what a victim she was and how scared she

was of my temper and how mean and cruel I was. BITCH! YOU just spent

the last hour egging me on without regard to my pleas to stop until my

temper boiled over!

I finally figured it out. I told her then that I would never play that

game again. The first sentence in one of those subjects would result in

a click of the phone or a walk away.

Anyone experience similar things from dear old nada?

Doug