NADA?!?.........: Re: Life Long Trauma & Birth

[Guest guest]

Hi, I'm pretty new here, can you share what the acronym NADA stands for/means? 

Thanks!

andra

" Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it; boldness has genius, power and

magic in it. " Goethe

Subject: Re: Re: Life Long Trauma & Birth

To: WTOAdultChildren1

Date: Wednesday, June 30, 2010, 5:49 PM

I understand.  My one sister says the same thing  of when her 2 kids were

born ( and they were healthy)  that  she had always dreamed of having our

mother with her when they were born and to help out for a couple of

weeks...nope, not with a nada :-(

Jackie

I didn't have a name for my Mother's problems when my son was born (other

than the very general term " nuckin fut " ) but bc of her instability, rages

and cruel remarks, I told my mother she could not come for his birth. Yes,

this was an extremely awkward conversation, but I did not want the focus of

that magical time to be on mother and on trying to guage when she might

" blow. " my husband and I are pretty much on our own and that was hard. It

still hurts that I had to be on my own with my son before he was a week old

after nearly 24 hours of active labor and nearly 4 hours in the delivery

room and what my doctor called a " blowout " birth and no mom to be there. I

didn't even expect sympathy from her bc she actually once told me (when she

was angry about something I wouldn't do) " Dont expect any sympathy from me

when you have a baby! I won't listen and I won't help! " My husband owns his

own business and in this economy...  He was there more than we could afford,

but I was devastated not to have the motherly help, comfort, and presence

all my friends received. (My MIL is deceased.) I just don't trust her to

hold it together and to focus on what is important - and she's so sensitive

that if I don't do everything her way she comes unglued. So I don't really

think I'm traumatized per se, but it is a lingering disappointment that I am

so sad had to become part of my reality.

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