Update

[Guest guest]

I just wanted to give everyone an update on everything that was going

on last time I posted.

I went to court today and my divorce is now final. My step-

daughter's mother called in a couple favors with some of the judge's

assistants to get me in quickly, otherwise it would have been the end

of September or beginning of October before we could get in.

Those of you that read the prior posts might remember that until I have the

final divorce papers in my hand I have to keep paying the $900 a month for

health insurance for the whole family, which I cannot afford, thus the rush to

get in.

If you're wondering, like most people have been, if you should say

sorry to hear that or congradulations, it would definately be

congradulations!

Things (other than the money part anyway) are going so well. The kids and I are

so much happier, I can't even begin to describe the weight that was lifted off

of all of us when he left.

It's like a different family, a different home, it's incredible, and

I'm happier than I've been in, well I can't remember how long.

It's the inside kind of happy, not the happy in the moment type. It feels so

good. The irony? He's still miserable, but now he can't blame me or " all my

health problems " .

Speaking of health problems! After taking anti-depressants for the

past year or so and not finding anything that seemed to work or that

was strong enough and we tried everything. Well, I haven't taken any

anti-depressants at all since the week he left and I'm fine!

I've suffered from depression my whole life, so I know when it's

depression or if I'm just sad. I have the occasional moments of

sadness at the loss of the dream of what I wanted my marriage to be,

but other than that absolutely fine.

Also, if you remember I had really high blood pressure and was on 4

different BP meds and we still couldn't get it under control. Well

last month I went in to my primary for my check up and it was 128/85,

which from what it had been was awsome. He brought me down to only 2

meds at that point.

I went in today, not even 3 hours after my divorce hearing actually, and my BP

was 110/58! He lowered the dosage to half on both the meds and we're pretty

sure that by my check up next month we'll be able to at least go down to just

one med or hopefully come off of them completely!

I find it quite amusing that his biggest complaints about me are

disappearing now that he's gone. The week after he left I had a mini

heart attack, actually I didn't know I had it until I told my Dr

about my odd back pain (in a place where there is never any pain) and

jaw pain.

He ordered an Echo immediately and they saw the damage on there and of course

some thickening of the heart wall from the blood pressure. After today's Dr's

apointment it hit me that being with him was

slowly killing me. I know it sounds a bit dramatic to say that, but

it's the truth.

The way he went about leaving, the lies and deceit, etc., really hurt

me when he left, but now? Now I know it's the best thing that could

have happened.

I would have kept trying to " make it work " and stayed with him out of a sense of

obligation to my vows and at the rate my body was going downhill. I don't know

how long I would have made it pysically. I guess I finally can see the rainbow

after the storm.

OK, enough of that. Thank you all so much for your support through

all of it, I cannot even begin to tell you all how much it helped.

Thanks again.

in FL