Re: What would you like to hear?

[Guest guest]

I like Black Raven's answer! It is really ideal.

I also like hearing: Is there anything I can do for you? and have people

really mean it.

I think the answer does depend on who is listening/asking. My husband &

close friends should respond differently from how work colleagues or

acquaintances do.

I get tired of people asking just about my pain and health. I am more than

my pain. And not everyone who asks needs to know the excruciating details

of my health. So I try to direct the conversation away from my pain. If

someone asks how I am doing, I am now using the following responses:

I'm having a challenging day. But I am really excited about _________

(gardening, pets, a visit to see friends, beading, whatever else it is that

I am besides the pain. Some days it is hard to remember so on a

non-challenging day, I made myself a list)

I'm okay. What did you do this weekend? (Or What was the last movie you

saw? Or Who do you think will win the Indy 500? Again, on a good day I

made myself a list of questions)

I'm getting better. Thanks for asking. What do you know about _________

(mysteries, cricket, soccer, barn swallows, WII fitness, whatever else it is

that I would like to know more about. Again, I made a list on a good day)

I'm doing rather well today. How is/are your _______________ (grandkids,

dogs, plants, whatever else it is that the person asking about is other than

a question about my pain)