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at a low point

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My jaw has been locked up since Saturday night. I have gone to the

ER (yesterday), with little results other than a steriod pack and a

muscle relaxer. My rheumy says call her tomorrow if it isn't any

better. The TMJ problem has spread around my head and down my neck.

I'd have a massage, but it hurts so much I don't want to be touched

right now!!

This is really wearing on me. I'm in a dark place right now. The

pain is awful and a horrible case of self loathing and pity has set

in. My husband took off from work to take care of me and I had to

cancel appointments to go see a neurologist. She is willing to give

me botox, but it will take 30 days to run through insurance--if they

approve. I'm on arava and a steriod pack, with some muscle relaxers

that don't really seem to work and some lortab that also don't seem

to work. In this area (tennessee) all doctors are very hesistant to

prescribe any sort of narcotic. Apparently this region is in the top

five for prescription drug abuse and OTC abuse. I had to fill out

paperwork to buy nose spray this weekend!

Someone please tell me you've gone through this and it gets better,

because like I said...I'm really bottoming out right now.

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