Re: hi hope this ok. feel like talking

[Guest guest]

Hey, I don't post much, but a couple things struck me here,

especially talking about family in general, made me want to talk

about family, too.....(see below)

> everyone probley has the skinny sister

> that can eat everything. seem like it anyway.

I have 3 skinny sisters. Well, not so much anymore, but I am the

only " fat " person in my family... not just immediate family, but all

my extended family, cousins, etc... We are all scattered across the

country, so I don't see much of them, but our last family reunion a

few years ago, I was looking at the photos and was like, yup, that's

me, the fat one... My older sister was ALWAYS a size 4. She was a

dancer and had the skinny legs I always wanted.. Ack! My other

younger sisters, one is getting plumper as she gets older, but still

nice healthy weight, and the other got more healthy looking after

she has had 3 kids... I wish I could say that mine was baby weight,

but nope! No excuses for me, darn it. Funny thing though, my super

skinny older sister now has a poochy belly after 2 kids. She

recently did the swim part of a relay tri-athelon(sp?) and had a

picture taken in her bathing suit... she said can you photo-shop my

belly onto my butt!? Her " poochy " belly is nothing compared to mine,

but I was like " welcome to the club! " I've been a member all my

life! Not to mention my mother who is like 5'1 and has never weighed

more than 105lb.

> she always told me nasty things my grandma are whoever said. I was

> eating to much and costing them to much money. so that hurt of

> course. I was eating because I was sad are it taste so good etc.

> people should think before they talk for sure. now my other

>sister jessica getting fat. so my sister sarah making fun of her

>and my mom boyfriend and my sister boyfriend been saying dumb stuff

>about her. I feel likeing slapping them. I know how it is to be

>fat. but she having a baby also next month.

It's crazy how family treat each other. I would have never thought

that my family contributed to my weight gain, they were always

loving and supportive with the best intentions, but my eyes are now

opened. I know Mom thought it was for the best, she never

intentionally meant to hurt me, and I am truly thankful for that.

But I know better now. When I was 10, she started locking things up,

and hiding foods, especially my favorites, locks on cabinets, locks

on the big freezer, etc. It made it a fun game to find the food,

find the key, see how much I could eat without them noticing, throw

in some rebellion and what a screwed up relationship with food

started a way back then. She also used to tell me that if I got much

bigger we'd have to start shopping in the " pretty plus " section.

That was awful to me, so I deferred for a long time shopping in the

plus section. I'd wear something awful looking or wear clothes that

were fit to be thrown out a long time ago, rahter than shop in the

plus section... Anyway...

> had a strange say stuff to me when I was 13 or 14 was 5 foot

>8inches weigh 138 . I was looking at the candy manchine. he said

>do you think you really need that. so crazy and rude. do not think

>I was fat. but he made me feel bad about myslef. someone always

>going to think your fat. so we should feel good about ourslefs. if

>I was a size 10. some guy going to ask why are you not a size 2

>lol.

This is just awful, I can't believe somebody would say something

like that. I have to admit, I always think people are thinking stuff

like that, but thank god no one ever actually said anything that

outright. That's just awful, what an as'hole...

Meg

[Guest guest]

, it sounds like you have been doing some good thinking in

regards to how you feel about yourself. That is very wonderful and I

think you are doing well with understanding that too.

Katcha

IEing since Marcg 2007

>

> Hi I hope this is ok. just feel like talking. I love reading everyone

> emails. i'm 5 foot 11 inches 171 right now. was 230 before about 8

> years ago. never went on a real diet. just cut down on food some and

> some drinking pop so much. I drink diet now. do not care about pop

> much now days anyway. I eat sugar stuff sometimes. but do not love it

> as much as I did. I feel guilty only if I eat sugar stuff if i'm

> alone. not sure why. but i'm usally sad etc when I want sugar really

> bad. try not to feel guilty.

>

> I hate watching t.v. sometimes. why do we all have to be a size 2?

> most woman can not do that. i'm mostly happy with my body. but we

> all want to lose that belly. everyone probley has the skinny sister

> that can eat everything. seem like it anyway. *I was 18 teen when I

> start getting fat. my sister was makeing fun of me. I thought I was

> sexy then. so was not sure why she was saying that stuff about me.

> I weigh myslef soon after that. I weigh 181 . that made me sick. so

> that's when I try to start going on diets. but no luck of course.

>

>

> she always told me nasty things my grandma are whoever said. I was

> eating to much and costing them to much money. so that hurt of

> course. I was eating because I was sad are it taste so good etc.

> people should think before they talk for sure. now my other sister

> jessica getting fat. so my sister sarah making fun of her and my mom

> boyfriend and my sister boyfriend been saying dumb stuff about her. I

> feel likeing slapping them. I know how it is to be fat. but she

> having a baby also next month.

>

>

> had a strange say stuff to me when I was 13 or 14 was 5 foot 8inches

> weigh 138 . I was looking at the candy manchine. he said do you think

> you really need that. so crazy and rude. do not think I was fat. but

> he made me feel bad about myslef. someone always going to think your

> fat. so we should feel good about ourslefs. if I was a size 10.

> some guy going to ask why are you not a size 2 lol.

>

> i'm never going to give cake up are junk food to be super skinny.

> that's not a life. michelle

>