I feel embarrassed and guilty about being in Pain.

[Guest guest]

I think People are looking at me and saying to themselves, " You look

fine to me, what is your problem? "

When I go to the Doc, they always pass me off and say, well, we don't

want you to get addicted to pain med, so we can't give you any help.

I get embarrassed for asking and agree. Then I leave and still hurt.

My Husband is wonderful, but he is frustrated, because of my pain, he

feels that he can't help me.....and keeps wanting me to go to another

doctor to find a cure....I tell him there is nothing they can do,

other than what they are....I just have to pace and listen to my body

and this is a condition that there is no cure, but that the good news

is it won't kill me....

I have multiple problems, can't do stairs, stand, Pain is just too

bad. Can't sleep, lost my voice 3 years ago. Exhausted all the time.

Hurt so bad I could cry and crawl in a corner....My arms and

shoulders hurt so bad....I have a new granddaughter...I can only hold

her if someone hands her to me on the couch or the bed, and can't

sing her a lullaby, or carry her around.

My shoulder hurts so bad I can't get my bra on myself. Sitting is

hard as well, Well, I have just done all this complaining.

I try to stay positive, and smile it all away...My Husband says he

can't understand how I do it,. Well, I don't want to loose my

Husband and family for complaining, so I just say OK, just need to

rest, I will be back...

I think I am just rambling, I am so weird,.... I am only 47 years

old, I was a Bank Teller, Kay Beauty Consultant, and always

there for anyone who needed me....but for the past 4 years My life

has changed drastically, I am at home most of the time, other than to

go to Wallmart and ride the electric cart to shop....highlight of my

day......LOL Only go once a month or so...

I am on social security disablilty, and I feel about 90 years old.

I have to go lay down for awhile....sorry this is so long...

Sara from NH