Guest guest Posted September 10, 2008 Report Share Posted September 10, 2008 Thanks again for all of the responses. I'm trying to observe myself through this whole experience and what I'm finding is that the less I use food for comfort, the more anxious and insecure I feel. It's kind of disconcerting, because I thought I got to the place where I didn't like my body, but at least I liked myself, and now I'm not so sure. I'm feeling less and less content with myself and more aware of my insecurities, faults etc. I feel like my confidence is slipping away as I give up my controlling behaviors with food and numbers. That's what I meant by it being a painful process. A few weeks into IE, I got rid of the anxiety by overeating for a few days, but that wasn't what I wanted either. I guess I'm looking for something in between. Deep down, care for myself is what brought me to IE, so I can't lose sight of that now as I'm gaining weight. I need to keep caring for myself regardless of my size. I guess I'm realizing how intertwined food and weight is with my self-esteem. What a disappointment. It makes me feel shallow and confused. Thanks for letting me know that I'm not alone and for your support. I truly hope to move beyond this moment so I can be more of an encourager on this site. Kari Subject: Re: taboo topicTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Wednesday, September 10, 2008, 10:17 AM Hey Kari! I really can't help because I'm going through the *exact*same thing right now, lol, but if it helps at all, you're not alone!! >> I know this may be an unhappy topic for some, but I'm wondering, has > anyone experienced getting to their natural weight through intuitive > eating? I just began the process in August and am struggling with > believing that this will actually happen for me. I know this is not a > quick and easy process, but I'm struggling with weight gain right > now. I know others are in the same boat, it's just so hard to stick > with it when I feel like I am doing the opposite that I want to be > doing to my body right now.> > My end goal is truly peace with food and my body, but this has been a > more painful and anxiety provoking process than I predicted.> > My scale is still in the closet and I have not weighed in a few days, > so I wonder if my mind is playing tricks on me, but I don't want to > turn back to the scale for my reality check.> > Sorry for this anxious rant. I guess I'm just looking for some hope > from the more experienced IE'ers. I also want to believe that what > you say in response is true, but this little voice in my head is > saying that you will only tell me what I want to hear to make me feel > better You may be thinking that if there's a little voice in this > girl's head, she has much bigger problems than learning to eat > intuitively. ..LOL! > > Thanks,> > Kari> IEing since August 21st> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 10, 2008 Report Share Posted September 10, 2008 Kari, It's ok - all those feelings you are having are legitimate and real. Eating may have masked them for you, but they were still there, just supressed. It will get better! The only way to let those feelings go is to experience them. Eventually, you won't feel so confused etc. I struggled with feeling angry and depressed when I stopped binging. I would binge to reduce anxiety and literally numb out any uncomfortable feelings. When I stopped binging so much, it was hard - I did not know what to do with all the emotion! I did alot of journaling, talking with my close friends, I started seeing my therapist again for a few sessions, and took many bubble baths and naps!! I feel so much better now. I have some good solid coping skills for my emotions, and binging is no longer one of them! I stopped my binging before IE, but IE is the perfect continuation of this recovery process for me. Being a neutral observer of my eating habits etc has been so helpful for me. I can finally be kind to myself around food. I have begun to drop my self-judging. I'm starting to accept my body the way it is. Hang in there! Good luck! Kim H. From: springfrog17 <christy.gualtieri@ gmail.com>Subject: [intuitiveEating_ Support] Re: taboo topicTo: IntuitiveEating_ Support@yahoogro ups.comDate: Wednesday, September 10, 2008, 10:17 AM Hey Kari! I really can't help because I'm going through the *exact*same thing right now, lol, but if it helps at all, you're not alone!! >> I know this may be an unhappy topic for some, but I'm wondering, has > anyone experienced getting to their natural weight through intuitive > eating? I just began the process in August and am struggling with > believing that this will actually happen for me. I know this is not a > quick and easy process, but I'm struggling with weight gain right > now. I know others are in the same boat, it's just so hard to stick > with it when I feel like I am doing the opposite that I want to be > doing to my body right now.> > My end goal is truly peace with food and my body, but this has been a > more painful and anxiety provoking process than I predicted.> > My scale is still in the closet and I have not weighed in a few days, > so I wonder if my mind is playing tricks on me, but I don't want to > turn back to the scale for my reality check.> > Sorry for this anxious rant. I guess I'm just looking for some hope > from the more experienced IE'ers. I also want to believe that what > you say in response is true, but this little voice in my head is > saying that you will only tell me what I want to hear to make me feel > better You may be thinking that if there's a little voice in this > girl's head, she has much bigger problems than learning to eat > intuitively. ..LOL! > > Thanks,> > Kari> IEing since August 21st> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 10, 2008 Report Share Posted September 10, 2008 Kim, Thank you so much for the encouragement! I was feeling a bit crazy, so it's good to know that someone else has been there and gotten through it. I think even posting my feelings was helpful in getting me past that moment and I so appreciate having a forum to do that. Kari From: springfrog17 <christy.gualtieri@ gmail.com>Subject: [intuitiveEating_ Support] Re: taboo topicTo: IntuitiveEating_ Support@yahoogro ups.comDate: Wednesday, September 10, 2008, 10:17 AM Hey Kari! I really can't help because I'm going through the *exact*same thing right now, lol, but if it helps at all, you're not alone!! >> I know this may be an unhappy topic for some, but I'm wondering, has > anyone experienced getting to their natural weight through intuitive > eating? I just began the process in August and am struggling with > believing that this will actually happen for me. I know this is not a > quick and easy process, but I'm struggling with weight gain right > now. I know others are in the same boat, it's just so hard to stick > with it when I feel like I am doing the opposite that I want to be > doing to my body right now.> > My end goal is truly peace with food and my body, but this has been a > more painful and anxiety provoking process than I predicted.> > My scale is still in the closet and I have not weighed in a few days, > so I wonder if my mind is playing tricks on me, but I don't want to > turn back to the scale for my reality check.> > Sorry for this anxious rant. I guess I'm just looking for some hope > from the more experienced IE'ers. I also want to believe that what > you say in response is true, but this little voice in my head is > saying that you will only tell me what I want to hear to make me feel > better You may be thinking that if there's a little voice in this > girl's head, she has much bigger problems than learning to eat > intuitively. ..LOL! > > Thanks,> > Kari> IEing since August 21st> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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