Re: Does this happen to you?

[Guest guest]

I don't know ... my 4 yr old with no ocd or anything does the exact same thing

and she doesn't let up either. May not be ocd ... just 4 yr old stubborn and

independent behavior.

blizzard2376 <wge376@...> wrote:

Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn into

OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because she

had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She knows that

if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well, she's

still screaming about getting it back, " Wand down, wand down. " And it

sounds and acts like an OCD thing because of how completely irrational

the whole thing is and because of the intensity of extreme nature of

the whole thing. This will go on for an hour or more. So normal

discipline turns into OCD? How should I handle it?

---------------------------------

Ahhh...imagining that irresistible " new car " smell?

Check outnew cars at Autos.

[Guest guest]

But also, even if it is the ocd, I don't think you can handle it any

differently. She needs to know there are consequences for her actions and

giving in in this type of situation, imho, would make things worse.

in TN

blizzard2376 <wge376@...> wrote:

Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn into

OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because she

had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She knows that

if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well, she's

still screaming about getting it back, " Wand down, wand down. " And it

sounds and acts like an OCD thing because of how completely irrational

the whole thing is and because of the intensity of extreme nature of

the whole thing. This will go on for an hour or more. So normal

discipline turns into OCD? How should I handle it?

---------------------------------

Ahhh...imagining that irresistible " new car " smell?

Check outnew cars at Autos.

[Guest guest]

2 hours and counting...

>

> Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn into

> OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because she

> had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She knows

that

> if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well, she's

> still screaming about getting it back, " Wand down, wand down. " And

it

> sounds and acts like an OCD thing because of how completely

irrational

> the whole thing is and because of the intensity of extreme nature of

> the whole thing. This will go on for an hour or more. So normal

> discipline turns into OCD? How should I handle it?

>

[Guest guest]

Oh my word--2 HOURS! I have two 4 year old boys right now (twins) and I

have 2 older kids. I haven't EVER had a breakdown here that's lasted

for more than 10 minutes or so. Do you just put her in her bed and tell

her to come out when she's done? I don't think I could stand the

screaming. Sounds like a rage to me and that's different that just

obstinent 4 yr. old behavior. I would ask in this group what their

kid's rages look like, what set them off, what ages, and what ultimately

helped them.

I'm so sorry! (And I thought having two 4 yr. olds at the same time was

hard enough!)

Dina

[Guest guest]

Yes! with my 4 year-old daughter who has OCD. We've had this issue for a long

time. We've just started seeing a psychologist who recommended that if she's

tantrumming about the consequences, then she has to go to time out until she

calms down. Sometimes I can head off a tantrum or interrupt one by telling her

that I think Mr. Worry is telling her to get stuck on a thought and that we

could work to make Mr. Worry go away. She can earn rewards for working to make

Mr Worry go away so sometimes she's interested in calming down to do this.

Other times, she is too upset and can't let go of it and can't calm down.

[Guest guest]

Hi,

Before I knew what was going on/before any OCd diagnosis, my dd was

having tantrums/rages daily. Nothing i could do would help so I

rsorted to sending her to her room 'to calm down'. She would willingly

go there, calm down and play by herself. Within 45 minutes she would

return as though nothing happened. I figured she just needed her

space. Now as I look back, she needed to finish whatever OCD

obssesion/ritual on her own.

cathy in MA

[Guest guest]

My experience has been the same as both & 's. DD is four, and

pre-DX she was having these unbelievable meltdowns that both my husband and

I felt were not your 'run-of-the-mill' (hahaha) little kid tantrums. It

seemed like she was not in control of herself, as opposed to having a

willful fit. Now that we know what's going on, it makes a lot more sense.

~ Ali

Quincy, MA

_____

From:

[mailto: ] On Behalf Of bobcathshek

Sent: Tuesday, April 24, 2007 6:52 PM

Subject: Re: Does this happen to you?

Hi,

Before I knew what was going on/before any OCd diagnosis, my dd was

having tantrums/rages daily. Nothing i could do would help so I

rsorted to sending her to her room 'to calm down'. She would willingly

go there, calm down and play by herself. Within 45 minutes she would

return as though nothing happened. I figured she just needed her

space. Now as I look back, she needed to finish whatever OCD

obssesion/ritual on her own.

cathy in MA

[Guest guest]

Hi,

That's precisely WHY we knew that something else was going on. My

son, at the age of 6, would completely dissolve whenever disciplined.

Even over a minor thing, he was consummed with " reversing " his bad

behavior...he'd walk backward, demand that we do the same, demand

that we spin the car around, demand that we carry him back out of

time out, since we'd carried him in. He once sat in time out 2 hours

past when we said things were over, because we refused to carry him

out of the room. Eventually, he coped by drawing " parts lists " for a

time machine that he could someday use to go back and make things

right. His tantrums were all consumming, " obsessive " we even called

them. We couldn't figure out why traditional discipline techniques

wouldn't make a dent. Once the world of OCD was illuminated,

everything became clear and life became manageable (somewhat! LOL).

Kris

> Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn

into

> OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because

she

> had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She knows

that

> if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well,

she's

> still screaming about getting it back, " Wand down, wand down. " And

it

> sounds and acts like an OCD thing because of how completely

irrational

> the whole thing is and because of the intensity of extreme nature

of

> the whole thing. This will go on for an hour or more. So normal

> discipline turns into OCD? How should I handle it?

>

>

>

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Ahhh...imagining that irresistible " new car " smell?

> Check outnew cars at Autos.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi,

That's precisely WHY we knew that something else was going on. My

son, at the age of 6, would completely dissolve whenever disciplined.

Even over a minor thing, he was consummed with " reversing " his bad

behavior...he'd walk backward, demand that we do the same, demand

that we spin the car around, demand that we carry him back out of

time out, since we'd carried him in. He once sat in time out 2 hours

past when we said things were over, because we refused to carry him

out of the room. Eventually, he coped by drawing " parts lists " for a

time machine that he could someday use to go back and make things

right. His tantrums were all consumming, " obsessive " we even called

them. We couldn't figure out why traditional discipline techniques

wouldn't make a dent. Once the world of OCD was illuminated,

everything became clear and life became manageable (somewhat! LOL).

Kris

> Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn

into

> OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because

she

> had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She knows

that

> if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well,

she's

> still screaming about getting it back, " Wand down, wand down. " And

it

> sounds and acts like an OCD thing because of how completely

irrational

> the whole thing is and because of the intensity of extreme nature

of

> the whole thing. This will go on for an hour or more. So normal

> discipline turns into OCD? How should I handle it?

>

>

>

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Ahhh...imagining that irresistible " new car " smell?

> Check outnew cars at Autos.

>

>

[Guest guest]

My dd used to have horrible rages from age 2-9.I used to walk on eggshells so

she wouldn't " go off " .I have used every method of discipline around. She is now

10 and finally stopped last year. Her rages would last anywhere from 2-4 hours

straight. I was living in a nightmare. Now that she is older and can talk about

her feelings a little better, she will still tantrum but not rage. The only

thing I could do to minimize her raging was lock her in her room( I know this

sounds harsh, but I had no choice) I would always stand outside the door to make

sure she was ok, or on other occasions I would physically hold her until she

calmed down. My dd also has been diagnosed with bipolar, but the doctors cannot

distinguish if her raging was caused by the bipolar or the ocd.

You have to do what works for your child, and you! If punishment doesn't work,

don't use it for the raging. If it does, you have to resort to it.

Hugs

Judy

[Guest guest]

--

Wow,

My ten year old has unbelievable tantrums. Says unbelievably cruel

things, has put the heel of his foot through the dry wall etc. I

treat kids with OCD, but honestly never heard much about the

tantrums. Truthfully, my husband and I were blaming the ADD. Does it

get better in time? Has anyone found the magic cure/ discipline for

the older kids? This morning he was full of hateful things to say to

me and his little sister. When I dropped him off at school he was in

tears because he " loves me so much and doesn't want to be without me

the whole school day " . I felt bad for him, but I did not feel sad

about being without him for the next 8 hous!

- In , " Ali Crehan Feeney "

<alicrehanfeeney@...> wrote:

>

> My experience has been the same as both & 's. DD is

four, and

> pre-DX she was having these unbelievable meltdowns that both my

husband and

> I felt were not your 'run-of-the-mill' (hahaha) little kid

tantrums. It

> seemed like she was not in control of herself, as opposed to having

a

> willful fit. Now that we know what's going on, it makes a lot more

sense.

>

>

>

> ~ Ali

>

> Quincy, MA

>

>

>

> _____

>

> From:

> [mailto: ] On Behalf Of bobcathshek

> Sent: Tuesday, April 24, 2007 6:52 PM

>

> Subject: Re: Does this happen to you?

>

>

>

> Hi,

> Before I knew what was going on/before any OCd diagnosis, my dd was

> having tantrums/rages daily. Nothing i could do would help so I

> rsorted to sending her to her room 'to calm down'. She would

willingly

> go there, calm down and play by herself. Within 45 minutes she

would

> return as though nothing happened. I figured she just needed her

> space. Now as I look back, she needed to finish whatever OCD

> obssesion/ritual on her own.

>

> cathy in MA

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

((hugs)) It is so hard sometimes to determine if a tantrum/meltdown

is coming from some anxiety related to OCD or just a preschooler

having a bad day/week and getting ready to go thru some " stubborn yet

determined " phase of personality.

I saw the *2 hours* update. That can still be a whiny, stubborn hold-

out tantrum.

I tend to think you should keep it since she did hit with it and knows

the rules about that. Possibly earn it back today in some way.

Well, it's been a while since you posted. Did things settle down?

single mom to 3 sons

2 of which could be very stubborn and cry & hold out for long periods

themselves! 1, age 18, still can't take " no " for an answer (I blame

that on his grandma/my mom!

>

> Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn into

> OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because she

> had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She knows

that

> if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well, she's

[Guest guest]

((hugs)) It is so hard sometimes to determine if a tantrum/meltdown

is coming from some anxiety related to OCD or just a preschooler

having a bad day/week and getting ready to go thru some " stubborn yet

determined " phase of personality.

I saw the *2 hours* update. That can still be a whiny, stubborn hold-

out tantrum.

I tend to think you should keep it since she did hit with it and knows

the rules about that. Possibly earn it back today in some way.

Well, it's been a while since you posted. Did things settle down?

single mom to 3 sons

2 of which could be very stubborn and cry & hold out for long periods

themselves! 1, age 18, still can't take " no " for an answer (I blame

that on his grandma/my mom!

>

> Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn into

> OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because she

> had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She knows

that

> if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well, she's

[Guest guest]

Well, thanks to all for the replies!

That day with my youngest just continued to get worse. Every little

thing during the day almost immediately would turn into an " OCD

thing. " Poor thing finally fell asleep in the car and had a very

fitful night's sleep. She was even yelling in her sleep -- she still

sounded angry!

Yesterday was much better.

I'm just at the end of my rope with dealing with these things -- or

actually with the lack of knowing HOW I should deal with them. My

oldest (now 14) was diagnosed with OCD at 6 by our HMO. They never

dealt directly with her OCD, and in fact, spent years " counseling "

us during which time I felt like I was trying to convince them of

the problem instead of them working on the problem. I know now that

THAT, in itself (nevermind the lack of OCD therapy) was extremely

harmful to my daughter. She was also a perfectionist who could not

accept any weakness (or perceived weakness) in herself. So, for her

therapists to indirectly imply that she didn't have OCD was more

than counterproductive -- it was damaging. She needed to know that

she had OCD, that it wasn't a " weakness, " that it was OK and that we

would all help her with it, that it wasn't anyone's fault. Instead,

her brain learned to cope by blocking things out, blaming others,

never to accept or admit to any weakness or flaw, instead of

learning healthy coping skills. Needless to say, she has big

problems now at 14...

Sorry to get OT there. It's just that I've dealt with this for

years, and I understand it very well it some ways. But, I just have

never figured out how I'm supposed to handle it when they go into an

OCD " fit. " My head and my heart can't stand the screaming anymore.

I've tried everything under the sun. I've gotten good at knowing the

difference between an OCD thing and just a regular kid thing. Kid

things respond to normal parenting techniques. OCD things don't.

> >

> > Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn into

> > OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because

she

> > had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She

knows

> that

> > if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well,

she's

>

[Guest guest]

yes! I'm having all sorts of flashbacks of my ds at 3 and 4, before

we had a clue what was coming, having the same tantrums - just as

intense and completely irrational. I can totally picture him standing

in front of the fridge (where I had put some toys I had taken away out

of reach) crying for literally HOURS to have them back. Same thing

about getting dressed. Sometimes it was if he wanted a certain snack

and we didn't have it - he'd cry and ask for it for hours on end. I

remember saying (ok, sometimes screaming) over and over that I

couldn't make the snack magically appear and how can I give him

something that we JUST DON'T HAVE? yikes, freaking myself out

here I remember picking him up from daycare one night and from

dinner til bed he cried over and over " want Lin " (the sitter) - just

what a mom wants to hear after a long day at work! And how the time-

outs NEVER worked like the books said. And I was just as stubborn and

sooooo determined not to have a " brat " that I would NEVER give in! And

that's part of the reason why it kills me when people assume that he's

just not disciplined, but that's another post! Anyway, I could go on

and on with fond memories exactly like what you are describing. When

my second son (non ocd, so far) reached preschool age and I'd say " go

sit in time out " I just about died when he actually did it! I think

the tantrums you are talking about are definetely an OCD thing. As to

how to handle them, I've got nothin. Just do your best to survive

them! My son is 9 now (diagnosed at 6) and has finally learned to

(most of the time) accept no for an answer and that change and

disappointments are inevitable. Maybe the OCD has just morphed away

from the " can't let it go " thing to the other fun stuff we're dealing

with, who knows? But I can completely relate and am cringing while I

do

Hang in there!

le

>

> Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn into

> OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because she

> had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She knows

that

> if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well, she's

> still screaming about getting it back, " Wand down, wand down. " And

it

> sounds and acts like an OCD thing because of how completely

irrational

> the whole thing is and because of the intensity of extreme nature of

> the whole thing. This will go on for an hour or more. So normal

> discipline turns into OCD? How should I handle it?

>

[Guest guest]

yes! I'm having all sorts of flashbacks of my ds at 3 and 4, before

we had a clue what was coming, having the same tantrums - just as

intense and completely irrational. I can totally picture him standing

in front of the fridge (where I had put some toys I had taken away out

of reach) crying for literally HOURS to have them back. Same thing

about getting dressed. Sometimes it was if he wanted a certain snack

and we didn't have it - he'd cry and ask for it for hours on end. I

remember saying (ok, sometimes screaming) over and over that I

couldn't make the snack magically appear and how can I give him

something that we JUST DON'T HAVE? yikes, freaking myself out

here I remember picking him up from daycare one night and from

dinner til bed he cried over and over " want Lin " (the sitter) - just

what a mom wants to hear after a long day at work! And how the time-

outs NEVER worked like the books said. And I was just as stubborn and

sooooo determined not to have a " brat " that I would NEVER give in! And

that's part of the reason why it kills me when people assume that he's

just not disciplined, but that's another post! Anyway, I could go on

and on with fond memories exactly like what you are describing. When

my second son (non ocd, so far) reached preschool age and I'd say " go

sit in time out " I just about died when he actually did it! I think

the tantrums you are talking about are definetely an OCD thing. As to

how to handle them, I've got nothin. Just do your best to survive

them! My son is 9 now (diagnosed at 6) and has finally learned to

(most of the time) accept no for an answer and that change and

disappointments are inevitable. Maybe the OCD has just morphed away

from the " can't let it go " thing to the other fun stuff we're dealing

with, who knows? But I can completely relate and am cringing while I

do

Hang in there!

le

>

> Behaviors or actions that are normal for the age turn into

> OCD " things. " Like today. I took a wand away from my 4yo because she

> had hit me with it because she was mad about something. She knows

that

> if she hits or throws something, it will get taken away. Well, she's

> still screaming about getting it back, " Wand down, wand down. " And

it

> sounds and acts like an OCD thing because of how completely

irrational

> the whole thing is and because of the intensity of extreme nature of

> the whole thing. This will go on for an hour or more. So normal

> discipline turns into OCD? How should I handle it?

>

[Guest guest]

Hi,

I know that when my dh's father had brain surgery (for brain cancer) he came

out of it with no emotions. It is a side effect and can happen in brain

surgeries. I know of another man it happened to in my town. My dh's father

was SO social and always telling jokes and laughing, talking to everybody.

Afterward he went to a(n) (occupational?) therapist to help him " fake it. "

Here is an abstract for an article about a study/observations about emotion

after brain surgery (sounded like the front of the brain.

HTH,

Toni

On Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 1:05 PM, ktbarrett_ca <ktbarrett_ca@...>wrote:

>

> Greetings!

>

> I am new to this group, and have only had seizures since 2001, so I am

> wondering if anyone else has the same issues I am experiencing.

>

> I had surgery back in 2001 for a burst cavernous malformation (a mess

> of knotted veins) in the right temporal lobe. Ever since the surgery,

> I have lost my " spark, " and don't really feel emotions of any type. I

> also don't want to be around people (I used to be a " social butterfly "

> before the malformation burst!). I still have seizures, and am on

> medication, which helps somewhat,

>

> So...does anyone else have these issues, too? Just curious.

>

> Many, many thanks!

>

> KATIE D.

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I don't know what it is, but i have exactly the same thing above my left

shoulder blade in a totally (for me!) unreachable spot. HATE it. Doesn't break

out or anything that I can see, just burns/hurts especially if I bump it or

anything. and i've tried lightly scratching thinking it might be itching a

little too? Bad mistake. hurt even worse.

>

> A week ago, my neck really hurt, even the skin felt prickly and painful. I

suffered for 3 days until it subsided. No the back or side of my left hip. It

seems to stem from the joint but feels inflamed and again the skin even hurts.

Almost feels bruised in a strange way.

>

> What is this and do you ever have this happen?

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Jane, Thank you for responding. I was reading on the internet about whats

going on with me and the only thing I could find was possibly Fibromyalgia,

something about a central nervous system disorder when your nerves go awry.

What are you diagnosed with? I am fairly new to this site and have alot of

symptoms but nothing coming out in my blood. My RA doctor, if she were to

guess, I have seronegative RA. Great. Well look forward to hearing from you.

>

> I don't know what it is, but i have exactly the same thing above my left

shoulder blade in a totally (for me!) unreachable spot. HATE it. Doesn't break

out or anything that I can see, just burns/hurts especially if I bump it or

anything. and i've tried lightly scratching thinking it might be itching a

little too? Bad mistake. hurt even worse.

>

[Guest guest]

, I do have RA along with fibromyalgia. I also have diabetes which can

cause neuropathy...gonna check with my rheumatologist tomorrow on all this. We

really do wake up in a new world every day!

Best wishes and hopes for pain free days for you.

Jane in rainy dallas

> >

> > I don't know what it is, but i have exactly the same thing above my left

shoulder blade in a totally (for me!) unreachable spot. HATE it. Doesn't break

out or anything that I can see, just burns/hurts especially if I bump it or

anything. and i've tried lightly scratching thinking it might be itching a

little too? Bad mistake. hurt even worse.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

well, i explained the weird burning pain to my rheumy. he is baffled.

ha!

Jane

> > >

> > > I don't know what it is, but i have exactly the same thing above my left

shoulder blade in a totally (for me!) unreachable spot. HATE it. Doesn't break

out or anything that I can see, just burns/hurts especially if I bump it or

anything. and i've tried lightly scratching thinking it might be itching a

little too? Bad mistake. hurt even worse.

> > >

> >

>