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Re: Ups and Downs....

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Hi Meg-

I've just started IE and wanted to ask you about the first few months you

have done it?

What were the hardest habits of the past for you to break? What surprised you.

Anything

you can share would be great.

Thanks,

le

>

> Boy it is hard to let past habits go isn't it? I was doing so well,

> I really was feeling like IE was coming more and more naturally, and

> it was. Then, 2 weekends ago I had a flyball tournament, and it is

> very hard to follow IE at a tourney. Our club had 4 teams running,

> and I was on 3 of them, and had to support the 4th, it's pretty much

> non-stop from 7am to 5pm, and exhausting, stressful and fun, too!

> You pretty much grab whatever you can and swallow it whole before

> you have to go race again. Since then, I haven't been

> feeling " normal " , just eating whatever, whenever I felt like it,

> eating when I am not hungry, having conversations in my head like

> you are not hungry, why are you eating? I don't know I just feel

> like it. But I am aware of it and give myself permission to eat. I

> won't feel bad about it. OK, now I feel bad about it, talk yourself

> out of feeling bad, etc... It just went on for over a week. I think

> I ate non-stop this past weekend. Well, I thought about what another

> poster said about putting my stake in and just getting back on it. I

> have for the past 2 days and fell so much better, but why is it so

> hard to get back to feeling good? It's like being addicted to

> feeling like crap. Why?!

>

> :)

> Meg

> IE since Feb '08

>

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Oh gosh! It'd would probably take me months to tell you about

everything I went through (and am still going through). I would

highly recommend going through the old posts on this board, as we

all go through things in different ways, and many people here have

been practicing IE longer than I. That said...

In a nutshell, I suppose the hardest habit for me to break was

eating mindlessly. I didn't have too much trouble determining hunger

or fullness IF I was paying attention to the signals. It's not

really a " broken " habit either, it's just that I am more aware of it

and most of the time I can get back to conciousness more quickly

than I used to. The most surprising thing was how little food I

actually needed to get full. One time it took me 3 separate meals to

eat a 6 " sub and bag of chips from Subway. Before I would have eaten

a 12 " for just one lunch. This way, you get to enjoy it 3 times,

instead of just once!

For me, I like to think of IE as a puzzle, when I get all the pieces

of the puzzle together it stays together pretty well by itself.

Sometimes though, I let some of the pieces fall out, and getting it

back together can be difficult. The best part though, is that it's

the SAME puzzle, and each time I put it back together, the easier it

becomes.

:)

Meg

IE since Feb '08

> >

> > Boy it is hard to let past habits go isn't it? I was doing so

well,

> > I really was feeling like IE was coming more and more naturally,

and

> > it was. Then, 2 weekends ago I had a flyball tournament, and it

is

> > very hard to follow IE at a tourney. Our club had 4 teams

running,

> > and I was on 3 of them, and had to support the 4th, it's pretty

much

> > non-stop from 7am to 5pm, and exhausting, stressful and fun,

too!

> > You pretty much grab whatever you can and swallow it whole

before

> > you have to go race again. Since then, I haven't been

> > feeling " normal " , just eating whatever, whenever I felt like it,

> > eating when I am not hungry, having conversations in my head

like

> > you are not hungry, why are you eating? I don't know I just feel

> > like it. But I am aware of it and give myself permission to eat.

I

> > won't feel bad about it. OK, now I feel bad about it, talk

yourself

> > out of feeling bad, etc... It just went on for over a week. I

think

> > I ate non-stop this past weekend. Well, I thought about what

another

> > poster said about putting my stake in and just getting back on

it. I

> > have for the past 2 days and fell so much better, but why is it

so

> > hard to get back to feeling good? It's like being addicted to

> > feeling like crap. Why?!

> >

> > :)

> > Meg

> > IE since Feb '08

> >

>

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Hi Meg,

I can REALLY relate to your post. I have been falling back into

several of my old, bad habits lately. I started Intuitive Eating a

couple of months after you did. I wonder if some backsliding is

common at this point in the intuitive eating journey?

I know I have been dealing with an exceptional amount of stress

lately, taking care of my mother (late stage Alzheimer's) while

trying to adapt to having hospice workers here a few times each week.

At this stage, however well intentioned I know the hospice people

are, the constant disruptions to our well established routine are

causing me a lot of stress and messing up my sleep schedule. Between

all the phone calls and visits, some days I can barely get my mother

(or myself) fed!

I think the economy is also a factor. The constant doom and gloom I

hear on the news does not help. I feel almost in a panic about food.

I feel like I need to buy some chickens and build a root cellar!

(Kidding, but only sort of.) I feel like now is not the time for me

to think about satisfaction as much as using up all the food we have

so it does not spoil. If I have a few more bites on my plate than I

want, I now eat them, thinking, " You had better eat that. You may

wish you had extra food down the road. "

In addition to not eating for satisfaction, I am eating larger

quantities, not thinking about hunger or fullness, more just going on

automatic pilot, putting the same amount on my plate I have eaten for

years. It is easier than having to " think " .

I have been eating all kinds of candy, even drinking soda which I

NEVER do. It's like I am an adolescent again, just testing my own

limits to see how bad I can eat before I feel sick. Smart, huh?

And I have noticed I am even going back to a bad old habit of eating

standing up in the kitchen. That was one of the first things I

noticed when I started eating intuitively. " Hey, I am not eating

standing up in the kitchen! " I don't know how/when exactly I started

doing that years ago, but it was like some little trick I played with

myself, saying, " Hey, the meal doesn't officially begin until you sit

down so all these calories you are ingesting in the kitchen, holding

onto your plate while standing, don't count. " Weird, I know. Well, I

noticed I started doing that again a few weeks ago.

Today I was happy to notice that I felt a little different. I did not

want to eat standing up. I was much more " tuned in " when I ate, I

chose to eat only things I really wanted, and stopped when I was

full. I am hoping this was just some weird phase I was going through.

I am hoping the same thing is true for you. Maybe it is common to

have these kinds of relapses from time to time. Maybe some members

with more experience can tell us if that is the case.

Thanks for sharing this with us, Meg. Hang in there!

I.E.ing since April '08

>

> Boy it is hard to let past habits go isn't it? I was doing so

well,

> I really was feeling like IE was coming more and more naturally,

and

> it was. Then, 2 weekends ago I had a flyball tournament, and it is

> very hard to follow IE at a tourney. Our club had 4 teams running,

> and I was on 3 of them, and had to support the 4th, it's pretty

much

> non-stop from 7am to 5pm, and exhausting, stressful and fun, too!

> You pretty much grab whatever you can and swallow it whole before

> you have to go race again. Since then, I haven't been

> feeling " normal " , just eating whatever, whenever I felt like it,

> eating when I am not hungry, having conversations in my head like

> you are not hungry, why are you eating? I don't know I just feel

> like it. But I am aware of it and give myself permission to eat. I

> won't feel bad about it. OK, now I feel bad about it, talk yourself

> out of feeling bad, etc... It just went on for over a week. I think

> I ate non-stop this past weekend. Well, I thought about what

another

> poster said about putting my stake in and just getting back on it.

I

> have for the past 2 days and fell so much better, but why is it so

> hard to get back to feeling good? It's like being addicted to

> feeling like crap. Why?!

>

> :)

> Meg

> IE since Feb '08

>

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>

> For me, I like to think of IE as a puzzle, when I get all the pieces

> of the puzzle together it stays together pretty well by itself.

> Sometimes though, I let some of the pieces fall out, and getting it

> back together can be difficult. The best part though, is that it's

> the SAME puzzle, and each time I put it back together, the easier it

> becomes.

>

> :)

> Meg

> IE since Feb '08

Meg,

Thanks for putting things this way. It's very helpful for me to see it

that way. I'm just starting to sort out the pieces, so that I can

begin the puzzle! :)

dawnz

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