RE: Re: Yes, I do still exist...

[Guest guest]

I feel like I am binging. I am defintely not stopping when I am satisfied or

even full. I am eating massive quantities of sweets. In less than one month of

IE, I gained 20 pounds! (I'm already obese.)

I just think there is something i'm missing here.

IE since 9-12-08

Re: Yes, I do still exist...

, what a HUGE step for you!! I look to you guys who are further

along and I see such hope. Thank-you so much for sharing that.

dawnz

>

> Hi Gillian,

> Welcome back! I have missed you! I am sorry you have been going

> through such a difficult time. If I had to live under the threat of

> evacuation for 8 weeks, I would feel like bingeing too! Talk about

> nervewracking! It makes my stomach churn just thinking about it.

>

> I am really glad you shared your experience with discovering that at

> this stage in your journey that even when you WANT to binge, it is

> impossible for you to do so. I have made a similar discovery lately

> but it was not until I read your post that I realized what a big step

> that is for me and that it is something I should really feel good

> about. Because I am morbidly obese, I tend to focus more on my

> concern that I am not losing weight. But your post reminds me

[Guest guest]

wrote:

> Because I am morbidly obese, I tend to focus more on my

> concern that I am not losing weight.

Ah yes, that's my trap as well. I hate that. It's so hard not to focus

on weight when you have such a long way to go.

Regards

s.

[Guest guest]

Hi !

Wow, what an incredible realization for you! I'm so happy for you and that you can look back and see your progress. It is very easy to focus on the negative and feel like you aren't moving forward. What you're noticing is what I see a lot. It's not that the binges stop completely right away, or at all, but they become less frequent and shorter. I love the self-talk you're doing, you are really learning to be a responsive parent to yourself.

Congratulations and keep us up to date on your progress!

Thanks!GillianGillian Hood-son, MS, ACSM

Healthier Outcomes

Get your report, "The 6 Steps to Guilt-Free Eating" by visiting http://www.HealthierOutcomes.com Check out the upcoming Am I Hungry? seminar beginning October 16th: http://www.BreakOutofDietPrison.com

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of Sent: Wednesday, October 08, 2008 12:24 AMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Yes, I do still exist...

Hi Gillian,Welcome back! I have missed you! I am sorry you have been going through such a difficult time. If I had to live under the threat of evacuation for 8 weeks, I would feel like bingeing too! Talk about nervewracking! It makes my stomach churn just thinking about it.I am really glad you shared your experience with discovering that at this stage in your journey that even when you WANT to binge, it is impossible for you to do so. I have made a similar discovery lately but it was not until I read your post that I realized what a big step that is for me and that it is something I should really feel good about. Because I am morbidly obese, I tend to focus more on my concern that I am not losing weight. But your post reminds me that I also need to focus on the positive, and one of the major positives is that I think I have only binged twice since starting I.E. 6 months ago. I used to binge once a week or at least every two weeks.I have been trying to legalize Halloween candy for the past few weeks. I bought 3 large bags of all my favorite candy and dumped everything into a huge bowl. I felt like I was making up for YEARS of deprivation regarding Halloween candy. What has happened is that every night after dinner, instead of having a home made dessert or fresh fruit, which would be my custom, I have been sitting down with this huge bowl of candy and eating my fill of it. Now if that doesn't sound like and look like a binge, I don't know what does. I was feeling pretty down about the whole thing until a few nights ago I put on my Food Anthropologist hat and looked at the issue objectively.My Food Anthropologist said, "Why are you calling this a binge? This is not a binge. Each night, you are eating about 4 or 5 mini-candy bars. You are carefully selecting the ones you want, so you will be satisfied, you are eating them slowly and enjoying them, and you are stopping when you are full. This is no different than you enjoying your normal dessert after dinner."That was quite a revelation to me. I guess I thought of it as a binge because I was sitting there with a big bowl of what I admittedly still think of as "forbidden food" in my lap, eating my fill. But that is the operative phrase, EATING MY FILL. If I were bingeing, I would not have stopped when I was full, I would have stopped when all the little packets of M & M's in the bowl were gone.And as I thought more about it, I realized on some nights, when I might have had an extra candy bar, I would get that old, panicky binge feeling. "Oh no! I am out of control! Help! Keep eating! Eat it ALL! Get rid of this stuff!" And I would go to take another packet of candy and my body would just say, loud and clear, "Ugh. No more. I am full. Step away from the candy.You may feel like punishing yourself but I am not going along for the ride since I am the one who will have to feel sick for the rest of the night!" And, like you, Gillian, even though my mind was saying, "Eat! Eat", my body would not permit it.And now that I think about it, the fact that I have been sitting every night for the past 2 weeks with a huge bowl of candy in my lap and NOT bingeing is HUGE progress. Yay me! I have been focusing so much on the negative "(What you are doing to yourself? Candy every night? You will rot out your teeth! You will develop diabetes! You are playing with fire!"),that I wasn't even able to see this as a positive thing and a sign of progress. Thank you for helping me to see the light, Gillian! It's so good to have your positive and strong voice back among us!I.E.ing since April '08

[Guest guest]

,

First, take a deep breath and stay in the moment the best you can.

What you are experiencing is normal for many people and it's not fun but it's also not a failed attempt at IE. Some people will gain weight during the allowing period when you are legalizing all food.

You may want to take a look at the legalization. Have you truely legalized everything? Do you still feel guilty when eating certain things? Are you still labeling things? Do you go unconcious when eating a previously "bad" food? Consider all the diet mentality behaviors. I often see that if the binging and/or overeating is continuing for a while (different time for everyone), it can be because you don't see all foods as equal. And as we know, if something isn't legal, we want more of it, often to the point of overeating.

I know this sounds annoying to many of my clients, because I say it all the time, but it's true - every time you overeat it's an opportunity to learn something. And that learning will contribute to taking another forward step on your IE journey.

Thanks!GillianGillian Hood-son, MS, ACSM

Healthier Outcomes

Get your report, "The 6 Steps to Guilt-Free Eating" by visiting http://www.HealthierOutcomes.com Check out the upcoming Am I Hungry? seminar beginning October 16th: http://www.BreakOutofDietPrison.com

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of heatherdc1980@...Sent: Wednesday, October 08, 2008 1:20 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: RE: Re: Yes, I do still exist...

I feel like I am binging. I am defintely not stopping when I am satisfied or even full. I am eating massive quantities of sweets. In less than one month of IE, I gained 20 pounds! (I'm already obese.) I just think there is something i'm missing here.IE since 9-12-08 Re: Yes, I do still exist..., what a HUGE step for you!! I look to you guys who are furtheralong and I see such hope. Thank-you so much for sharing that. :)dawnz>> Hi Gillian,> Welcome back! I have missed you! I am sorry you have been going > through such a difficult time. If I had to live under the threat of > evacuation for 8 weeks, I would feel like bingeing too! Talk about > nervewracking! It makes my stomach churn just thinking about it.> > I am really glad you shared your experience with discovering that at > this stage in your journey that even when you WANT to binge, it is > impossible for you to do so. I have made a similar discovery lately > but it was not until I read your post that I realized what a big step > that is for me and that it is something I should really feel good > about. Because I am morbidly obese, I tend to focus more on my > concern that I am not losing weight. But your post reminds me

[Guest guest]

Thanks Katcha, and I'm thrilled to be back. And I can tell everyone on this list that if I could do these things and overcome my disordered eating, than you can too. I really didn't think I could do it. I thought I was different, I was flawed, that something was wrong with me compared to everyone else and I had no hope. If any of you feel this way, please know it's not true.

Wow, how long have I been IEing? I think since 2000, so 8 years? I just checked my website and it says over 6, but that was written a couple years ago, so there you go.

Thanks!GillianGillian Hood-son, MS, ACSM

Healthier Outcomes

Get your report, "The 6 Steps to Guilt-Free Eating" by visiting http://www.HealthierOutcomes.com Check out the upcoming Am I Hungry? seminar beginning October 16th: http://www.BreakOutofDietPrison.com

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of KatchaSent: Tuesday, October 07, 2008 5:18 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Yes, I do still exist...

GOOD to read a post from you Gillian! I know you have been workingyour way back here, but its wonderful to actually have you here too. Excellent post about long term IE does bring significant changes thatwe all so doubt will ever be possible when we start. You have beenIEing for at least 7 years right?!? IE for life I say :)ehugs, KatchaIEing since March 2007>> Hi Everyone!> > > > I've been wanting to pop in and say hello for some time now, itseems like> forever since I've participated in the conversations. I've beenstaying in> touch, reading the messages and it's been really cool to see howwell you> all are supporting each other. There is so much wisdom in thisgroup, every> single post is helpful to someone in the group, even the silentmajority. We> now have over 1200 members, the word is spreading! > > > > I want to thank both Katcha and Eva for all their help in myabsence, it's> been so helpful knowing they are here to keep things runningsmoothly while> I was dealing with my own stuff this summer. > > > > Also, welcome to all our new members! It seems many of you havesettled into> the group and are getting and offering support. If you have anyquestions or> concerns about the group, don't hesitate to email me directly. > > > > I have had a challenging and very stressful summer, which is thereason I> have not been very active here. I have to believe it's behind me nowand I> can get back to my "normal" life. But whenever I am dealing withsomething> really difficult or stressful, I always try to look back and seewhat I was> supposed to learn from that situation or what the positive was that came> from it. Not always easy, of course, but it helps put things inperspective.> One of my observations from this time may be encouraging for thoseof you> still at the beginning of your IE journey.> > > > I don't remember a more stressful time in my life than this summer.It was> not because of what was going on, it was the number of thingshappening at> once. We were right in the middle of the Northern California fires for> almost 8 weeks, under the threat of evacuation. We were safe andnever had> to leave, so we were lucky, but it was scary. I also had three family> emergencies happen within a 2 week period, and other things that I won't> bore you with. It's not my intention to be a victim here or whineabout my> life, I just want to set the scene for you. That's because even though I> have been eating intuitively for quite a while now and usually don'thave> urges to binge, those old desires to binge came up a lot this summer. > > > > I'm sure many of you feel like you'll never get past the binging orbreak> the cycle of stress/emotional eating. I know I felt that way a lot. It> seemed like maybe this works for other people, but it isn't going towork> for me. What I started to see and hopefully what you're seeing is adecrease> in that behavior and maybe you have noticed that your binges aren't as> intense or as long as they used to be before you discovered IE.Eventually I> stopped binging and my urges to binge went away as well. But like Isaid,> they came back this summer. It really scared me at first. Then I calmed> down, remembered that it was my choice to binge if I so choose, and that> this was my coping mechanism for years and years, so of course underextreme> stress my brain was going to turn to binging. At one point I decidedto go> ahead and have that binge I wanted so bad, even though I knew itwouldn't> solve anything and I would probably not feel well afterwards. I remained> aware of what I was doing and the consequences and decided to do itwithout> feeling guilty afterwards. > > > > Here's the best part: I had all the food ready, went to the store,got all> my "favorites". I started eating, and after about 10 minutes, Ididn't want> anymore. I was done physically and my body did not want me to eatanymore.> It was impossible for me to binge! In the moment, it's a bitdisappointing,> my friend binging is gone for good, but looking back it's awesome.When I> looked at how much I had eaten on my so-called binge, it was basically> enough to get me to full or satisfied, not stuffed, not overly full,just> enough.> > > > The point of this long rambling is to encourage all of you to keepgoing, it> gets easier, it becomes more natural, and will become a part of yourlife> that generally takes care of itself. > > > > If I can be of any help to any of you, don't hesitate to contact me. And> please keep posting here, share your experiences, ask for support,and get> what you need! A big part of IE is asking for and getting what youneed. We> are all here to support you in this, even if no one else outside of the> group understands.> > > > > > Thanks!> Gillian> > Gillian Hood-son, MS, ACSM> > Healthier Outcomes> > > > > > Get your report, "The 6 Steps to Guilt-Free Eating" by visiting> http://www.HealthierOutcomes.com <http://www.healthieroutcomes.com/> > > > Check out the upcoming Am I Hungry? seminar beginning October 16th:> http://www.BreakOutofDietPrison.com>

[Guest guest]

I agree Gillian with your thoughts it is a learning experience for me on my journey sometimes it takes me longer to learn the lesson then others but it does help me. Eva

"I know this sounds annoying to many of my clients, because I say itall the time, but it's true - every time you overeat it's anopportunity to learn something. And that learning will contribute totaking another forward step on your IE journey."Gillian,This was incredibly helpful for me to hear this morning. Incredibly.So maybe I AM on the right track. dawnz------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Gillian,I hope you are doing better! I miss talking to you and your wisdom. Your story below gives me hope. I do know that binging anymore isn't an option. I keep eating about the same every day and that is I guess ok?! Subject: RE: Re: Yes, I do still exist...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Friday, October 10, 2008, 8:50 PM

Thanks Katcha, and I'm thrilled to be back. And I can tell everyone on this list that if I could do these things and overcome my disordered eating, than you can too. I really didn't think I could do it. I thought I was different, I was flawed, that something was wrong with me compared to everyone else and I had no hope. If any of you feel this way, please know it's not true.

Wow, how long have I been IEing? I think since 2000, so 8 years? I just checked my website and it says over 6, but that was written a couple years ago, so there you go.

Thanks!GillianGillian Hood-son, MS, ACSM

Healthier Outcomes

Get your report, "The 6 Steps to Guilt-Free Eating" by visiting http://www.Healthie rOutcomes. com Check out the upcoming Am I Hungry? seminar beginning October 16th: http://www.BreakOut ofDietPrison. com

From: IntuitiveEating_ Support@yahoogro ups.com [mailto:IntuitiveEa ting_Support@ yahoogroups. com] On Behalf Of KatchaSent: Tuesday, October 07, 2008 5:18 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_ Support@yahoogro ups.comSubject: [intuitiveEating_ Support] Re: Yes, I do still exist...

GOOD to read a post from you Gillian! I know you have been workingyour way back here, but its wonderful to actually have you here too. Excellent post about long term IE does bring significant changes thatwe all so doubt will ever be possible when we start. You have beenIEing for at least 7 years right?!? IE for life I say :)ehugs, KatchaIEing since March 2007>> Hi Everyone!> > > > I've been wanting to pop in and say hello for some time now, itseems like> forever since I've participated in the conversations. I've beenstaying in> touch, reading the messages and it's been really cool to see howwell you> all are supporting each other. There is so much wisdom in thisgroup, every> single post is helpful to someone in the group, even the silentmajority. We> now have over 1200 members, the word is spreading! > > > > I want to thank both Katcha and Eva for all their help in myabsence, it's> been so helpful knowing they are here to keep things runningsmoothly while> I was dealing with my own stuff this summer. > > > > Also, welcome to all our new members! It seems many of you havesettled into> the group and are getting and offering support. If you have anyquestions or> concerns about the group, don't hesitate to email me directly. > > > > I have had a challenging and very stressful summer, which is thereason I> have not been very active here. I have to believe it's behind me nowand I> can get back to my "normal" life. But whenever I am dealing withsomething> really difficult or stressful, I always try to look back and seewhat I was> supposed to learn from that situation or what the positive was that came> from it. Not always easy, of course, but it helps put things inperspective.> One of my observations from this time may be encouraging for thoseof you> still at the beginning of your IE journey.> > > > I don't remember a more stressful time in my life than this summer.It was> not because of what was going on, it was the number of thingshappening at> once. We were right in the middle of the Northern California fires for> almost 8 weeks, under the threat of evacuation. We were safe andnever had> to leave, so we were lucky, but it was scary. I also had three family> emergencies happen within a 2 week period, and other things that I won't> bore you with. It's not my intention to be a victim here or whineabout my> life, I just want to set the scene for you. That's because even though I> have been eating intuitively for quite a while now and usually don'thave> urges to binge, those old desires to binge came up a lot this summer. > > > > I'm sure many of you feel like you'll never get past the binging orbreak> the cycle of stress/emotional eating. I know I felt that way a lot. It> seemed like maybe this works for other people, but it isn't going towork> for me. What I started to see and hopefully what you're seeing is adecrease> in that behavior and maybe you have noticed that your binges aren't as> intense or as long as they used to be before you discovered IE.Eventually I> stopped binging and my urges to binge went away as well. But like Isaid,> they came back this summer. It really scared me at first. Then I calmed> down, remembered that it was my choice to binge if I so choose, and that> this was my coping mechanism for years and years, so of course underextreme> stress my brain was going to turn to binging. At one point I decidedto go> ahead and have that binge I wanted so bad, even though I knew itwouldn't> solve anything and I would probably not feel well afterwards. I remained> aware of what I was doing and the consequences and decided to do itwithout> feeling guilty afterwards. > > > > Here's the best part: I had all the food ready, went to the store,got all> my "favorites". I started eating, and after about 10 minutes, Ididn't want> anymore. I was done physically and my body did not want me to eatanymore.> It was impossible for me to binge! In the moment, it's a bitdisappointing,> my friend binging is gone for good, but looking back it's awesome.When I> looked at how much I had eaten on my so-called binge, it was basically> enough to get me to full or satisfied, not stuffed, not overly full,just> enough.> > > > The point of this long rambling is to encourage all of you to keepgoing, it> gets easier, it becomes more natural, and will become a part of yourlife> that generally takes care of itself. > > > > If I can be of any help to any of you, don't hesitate to contact me. And> please keep posting here, share your experiences, ask for support,and get> what you need! A big part of IE is asking for and getting what youneed. We> are all here to support you in this, even if no one else outside of the> group understands.> > > > > > Thanks!> Gillian> > Gillian Hood-son, MS, ACSM> > Healthier Outcomes> > > > > > Get your report, "The 6 Steps to Guilt-Free Eating" by visiting> http://www.Healthie rOutcomes. com <http://www.healthie routcomes. com/> > > > Check out the upcoming Am I Hungry? seminar beginning October 16th:> http://www.BreakOut ofDietPrison. com>

[Guest guest]

Gillian Hood-son wrote:

> You may want to take a look at the legalization. Have you truely legalized

> everything? Do you still feel guilty when eating certain things? Are you

> still labeling things? Do you go unconcious when eating a previously " bad "

> food?

I'm still a " food labellor " . I can't help but seeing artificial, fat-

and calorie- and chemistry-loaden foods like all these sweets and

convenience foods (all the people who talk about " good chocolate " : take

a look at the ingredients list, still a lot of stuff many people can't

pronounce right) as bad. I also think of eating animal products as

" bad " . ( " Why does this animal have to suffer because of my

greediness?! " )

It seems like I'm not able to eat animal foods without a bad conscience,

even though I crave them (a lot of them because I can't afford the more

expensive alternatives at the moment AND these food would be

chemistry-loaden as well).

I can't decide if that's " just " diety thinking or if it's something

else, but I'd rather eat unroasted nuts than a sugar- and fat-free

jello.

Regards

s.