Feeling Alone

September 2, 2005

Dear ,

You are not alone. I'm so sorry things aren't going well right now.

When my was 14 and was suddenly a very, very sick young man I felt

just like you do. I really though he would die either from doing

something stupid like running into traffic, or from suicide, or from

starvation. I spent many days and nights in anguish. We were also in a

position where we couldn't do the sort of rewards he wanted (like

gamecube games, etc.) and he had no incentive to try to get better. He

didn't care if he was " weird " and even though life was better with OCD

because he could be safe. He retreated in his mind to a " warm, dark

place, " he called it a hole, and he even tried to make a hole out of a

huge Rubbermaid bin lined with blankets. He would crawl in and close

the lid (I didn't know about this right away) to feel warm and safe. He

thought his bed had an invisible force field around it and he wouldn't

leave it. He was seeing and hearing things that were not there. He

would not open up to the counselor. I felt so alone, helpless, ashamed

and guilty.

Things gradually began to get better after he went on Zoloft and

Risperdal. Now he is pretty okay. He still has " quirks " which I see

that others probably miss. Things that used to make him have to spit

and spit now just require him to wipe his lips off. Much more socially

acceptable. He has stopped having to spin when he goes under the

archways between rooms in our house, but sometimes he turns slightly.

He no longer freaks out about germs. He won't bite into something that

someone else has bitten (like a piece of a sandwich) but that is

socially okay, too. He is going to a new counselor, who is able to get

Dave to talk, and remains on meds. He recently stopped taking them

(again), though and I could tell there was something wrong with him

because he reverted to being worried about being near his sister and

spinned through the archway. So, I am afraid that he may be on meds for

a while. But I am glad to have the meds. They have helped him find

himself again and have allowed him to have control of his life and to

HAVE a life again.

Let us know how your trip goes.

Kim in IA (, 16 OCD)

February 19, 2006

When I am feeling down, I have a good cry. Then, I put everything in

perspective.... for example, it could always be worse. Be grateful for what you

are able to do rather than gloomy on what you can't do. But, cry first!

My mom was just diagnosed with breast cancer on Thursday.... but it could

almost always be worse.

When I start getting down on the things I can't do anymore (sports, long

walks, bike riding, jumping rope, living with out pain, etc, etc, etc,) I

remember the things I can do that make me happy. I love to cook... I can still

travel and am planning a big summer trip with my husband. I love to knit and

learning how to sew.... and I can still work. I am a teacher and am grateful

that I have a good job that I can do.

Buckleybabe, cry and start counting your blessings.

Just my .02 worth,

Jody

buckleybabe2005 <buckleybabe2005@...> wrote:

My doctor is great and

takes the time to listen to me but i would appreciate any feelings for

fighting the blues.

February 19, 2006

Dear Feeling Alone,

I understand how you feel. Having chronic pain is an inexplicable feeling. I

have a beautiful, loving wife and a great family- but was unable to share with

them my feelings. As my PA and P progressed, I felt more and more isolated.

Unfortunately, my level of depression worsened to the point that I failed to

maintain my household obligations and forced my family into foreclosure and

bankruptcy. For some reason, no one in my family had caught just how depressed

I was until the finances came into light and I attempted suicide. You must,

must, must talk to someone professionally and stay ontop of the depression. It

is so closely interwoven to the chronic pain component of our disease. As for

me, I am recovering, and in a good mental health program now. My wife and I are

talking again and I am hopeful to return to our family by the summer.

Please, do not feel alone. We are all here, and we are all ready to

communicate. So many of us are going through this with you. Good Luck!

-Lars

buckleybabe2005 <buckleybabe2005@...> wrote:

Hi I am new to this so sorry if I sound stupid. I am a 27 year old

female with psoriasis who has recently been diagnosed with pa,

fibromialga and depression, and to be honest right now I feel alone.

My mums their as always but I don't want to burden her with how I feel

my boyfriend doesn't understand and well I've basically shut my self

off from veryone else. I think I need help. My doctor is great and

takes the time to listen to me but i would appreciate any feelings for

fighting the blues.

February 19, 2006

Dear Feeling Alone:

I am 60 and I have PA. I informed my family about PA, about this group, about

fatigue, and about their inability to understand me. I informed them of the

mortgage payment, the tax payment, and other payments and bills. I told them I

feel I may die any day and you have to be prepaired and take care of yourselves.

I told them that before I die I would like the china cabinet which I bought and

left in the garage (because my wife does not like it) be moved to the living

room and filled with books that are in the basement out of sight. I told them

this a few months ago. They did not care about the china cabinet and I don't

care much about any thing any more (except my joints). I feel alone too, but I

was a loner all my life and it does not bother me, I feel great.

I hope you feel good too.

Lawrence Lichtenfeld <sportslinq@...> wrote:

buckleybabe2005 <buckleybabe2005@...> wrote:

Hi I am new to this so sorry if I sound stupid. I am a 27 year old

female with psoriasis who has recently been diagnosed with pa,

fibromialga and depression, and to be honest right now I feel alone.

My mums their as always but I don't want to burden her with how I feel

my boyfriend doesn't understand and well I've basically shut my self

off from veryone else. I think I need help. My doctor is great and

takes the time to listen to me but i would appreciate any feelings for

fighting the blues.

February 20, 2006

Thank you fro your kind words as it is good to find a site where i can talk to

people who understand. Things just seem to get on top of me as i am having to

sell my house because it has stairs and is just to big for me to cope in. I am

glad to hear things are back on track for you and your family. I hope to hear

from you soon and thanks again. Lynn

Lawrence Lichtenfeld <sportslinq@...> wrote: Dear Feeling Alone,