Re: Re: Any past calorie counters out there?

[Guest guest]

Glad I could be of some help!

Kipkabob

(Intuitive eating since September 2006)

Subject: Re: Any past calorie counters out there?To: IntuitiveEating_Support Received: Monday, December 8, 2008, 11:04 AM

Thank you! It is so good to hear that someone was able to move beyond the daily counting. Your reply helped me realize I get so focused on the end result I always lose sight of how the journey helps me get there. I remember last time this is where I got tripped up, rejecting the diet mentality. At the time I was in a very stressful point in my life and I just felt exhausted so I gave up. I can't do that again... Thanks!- K

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[Guest guest]

I dont count calories or points, but i did radically overeat over thanksgiving, not just for one day, but for several days in a row. So i can relate to that part of the experience.

I tried to just keep telling myself that it was okay if that happened for a couple of days, and that in a way, I was succeeding in doing IE because I at least I was more aware of what I was doing, and was much more conscious of being too full, even if I overate anyway.

I tried to see it as a success along the road to IE. I really believe that with every experience we learn, so that it's moving us closer to our own personal destination.

So if you learned something about yourself, that's valuable.

When I came back home, i was trying to honor my hunger, and was horrified that I was starving about every two hours, even though I had been stuffing myself the past three days. And still wanted sweets and white bread. But after a day of that, my appetite dropped way down.

Just try to tune back in to your body, forgive yourself, remind yourself that however you eat, you keep on learning about yourself. and just try to focus today on listening to your body again.

This wasn't a failure, this was a learning experience!

No, you were a huge help... I appreciate any response! Even knowing that someone else out there is struggling with this is a huge help to me. I find myself panicking that I will gain weight through I.E. So I

calorie count to control that panic feeling. But I just try to tell myself that, regarding my weight, I am unhappy if I am dieting, binging, overeating, restricting etc... So I need to finally call all of this off. Nothing has worked for me, it has only

made me more unhappy. I don't want to look back on my life as a struggle with weight. I want to eventually be able to move into some sort of positive direction. Anything but the constant circles! For me, I always would emotionally/over/binge eat so I figure if I do

IE at the very worst I won't gain weight... because I won't be binging on food but eating it in moderation. But only time will tell. I refuse to let myself weigh in until I know there will be a positive

result. So today I won't let myself tally my calories. I have let myself do that until now... I am fighting the urge. Tallying my calories to justify my IE only reinforces the diet mentality. It is a hard urge

to fight... Usually I pull out my cell phone calculator and do it real fast but not today. I am trying to tell myself one step at a time... We can do it! ; ) - K > > > Has anyone else gone through this? Thanks for reading... : ) > > Yes, I even went to my old foodplaner accunt today after discovering

> that I gained weight during exam preparation. My jeans are tighter than> they used to be.> > I will stop this. It's so damn toxic. I try to be nice to myself but> catch myself thinking " how can I cut calories " during the last days

over> and over again.> > No wonder I gained weight during exam preparation. I ate past fullness> way too often and I drank more alcohol than usually. It's really> alarming how weight gain can blow anything IE for me. I hate that.

Not> that I was the only one gaining weight during exam preparation. Several> colleagues complained about that. Not that they would be fat right now> even though they probably gained more weight than I did...

> > I feel the urge to " revamp my diet " again. It's so tempting right now.> > I'm sorry I was no help. I need help myself right now with this issue.> > Regards

> s.>

[Guest guest]

Abigail Wolfson wrote:

> When I came back home, i was trying to honor my hunger, and was horrified

> that I was starving about every two hours, even though I had been stuffing

> myself the past three days. And still wanted sweets and white bread. But

> after a day of that, my appetite dropped way down.

I made that experience, too. It horrified me. " Now that the exam is

over, I STILL want to overeat?! Oh, no!! "

It scared me. It has gotten less worse since a few days but it was way

better a year ago.

> Just try to tune back in to your body, forgive yourself, remind yourself

> that however you eat, you keep on learning about yourself. and just try to

> focus today on listening to your body again.

> This wasn't a failure, this was a learning experience!

It feels so much like a failure, sigh. However, what is worse than this

" being a failure " feeling is the thought of " oh no, this is happening

all over again " . You know, these episodes of losing weight and then

gaining and gaining and gaining and gaining... without being able to

control the urge to JUST EAT.

On days I notice a larger appetite or a strong drive to eat without

being hungry throw me into a panic. It was not THAT bad while I was

still losing weight (though still a very unpleasant feeling). But now

that I've gained it's horrible and scaring me. My health has improved

since I lost a bit of weight - I don't want to destroy that because the

eating starts again!

I wonder how long it will take until these

eating-more-than-is-good-for-me days won't scare me that much anymore. A

few months ago I was able to deal with a single day of overeating and I

could relax the day after when I noticed a smaller appetite again. Even

two days in a row was manageable but made me nervous. I hoped that this

would improve with time but what happened is that I took several steps

back. It's alarming to see how deeply ingrained eating/coping patterns

are and that " newer, healthier patterns " are wiped out within days when

the going gets tough. It makes me feel disappointed, scared and weak.

" Weak " seems to be the predomiant feeling lately when it comes to using

food as a coping mechanism. I can't help the thoughts: " Look at what

you're doing (again)! Using food as a coping mechanism! Look at other

people. They don't have to do that! They're man/woman enough to get

through hard times without having to stuff themselves and being fat! "

I envy these people and I feel shame and inferior because I need (and

obviously always needed and maybe will always need) FOOD to cope with

the hard things in life and everyone is able to see my weakness (visible

fat).

This is really depressing and scary.

Regards

s.

[Guest guest]

S-

I am struggling with the same "fear". I say to myself, "Come on! What's going on here? Get back on track!" The pounds are coming on....

Part of me says, "well, what do you expect when you eat whatever you want whenever you want it!? The pounds, of course, will come back!! Duh!"

That voice is not so very kind.

But the fear is very real within me.

> When I came back home, i was trying to honor my hunger, and was horrified> that I was starving about every two hours, even though I had been stuffing> myself the past three days. And still wanted sweets and white bread. But> after a day of that, my appetite dropped way down.I made that experience, too. It horrified me. "Now that the exam isover, I STILL want to overeat?! Oh, no!!"It scared me. It has gotten less worse since a few days but it was waybetter a year ago.> Just try to tune back in to your body, forgive yourself, remind yourself> that however you eat, you keep on learning about yourself. and just try to> focus today on listening to your body again.> This wasn't a failure, this was a learning experience!It

feels so much like a failure, sigh. However, what is worse than this"being a failure" feeling is the thought of "oh no, this is happeningall over again". You know, these episodes of losing weight and thengaining and gaining and gaining and gaining... without being able tocontrol the urge to JUST EAT.On days I notice a larger appetite or a strong drive to eat withoutbeing hungry throw me into a panic. It was not THAT bad while I wasstill losing weight (though still a very unpleasant feeling). But nowthat I've gained it's horrible and scaring me. My health has improvedsince I lost a bit of weight - I don't want to destroy that because theeating starts again!I wonder how long it will take until theseeating-more- than-is-good- for-me days won't scare me that much anymore. Afew months ago I was able to deal with a single day of overeating and Icould relax the day after when I noticed a smaller

appetite again. Eventwo days in a row was manageable but made me nervous. I hoped that thiswould improve with time but what happened is that I took several stepsback. It's alarming to see how deeply ingrained eating/coping patternsare and that "newer, healthier patterns" are wiped out within days whenthe going gets tough. It makes me feel disappointed, scared and weak."Weak" seems to be the predomiant feeling lately when it comes to usingfood as a coping mechanism. I can't help the thoughts: "Look at whatyou're doing (again)! Using food as a coping mechanism! Look at otherpeople. They don't have to do that! They're man/woman enough to getthrough hard times without having to stuff themselves and being fat!"I envy these people and I feel shame and inferior because I need (andobviously always needed and maybe will always need) FOOD to cope withthe hard things in life and everyone is able to see my

weakness (visiblefat).This is really depressing and scary.Regardss.

[Guest guest]

S,

is there anything else going on in your life right now that is throwing you out of sync? other life stressors?

are you getting enough sleep? exercise?

do you think you could try to focus on taking gentle, loving care of yourself while letting go of the food issues for even a couple of days?

i like the idea of talking to and treating myself like a small child, as others have mentioned. if that works for you, how would you help her (your inner child) if SHE was feeling bad?

hope this might be helpful.

good luck, and be gentle with you! you deserve loving kindness.

abby

Abigail Wolfson wrote:> When I came back home, i was trying to honor my hunger, and was horrified

> that I was starving about every two hours, even though I had been stuffing> myself the past three days. And still wanted sweets and white bread. But> after a day of that, my appetite dropped way down.

I made that experience, too. It horrified me. " Now that the exam isover, I STILL want to overeat?! Oh, no!! " It scared me. It has gotten less worse since a few days but it was waybetter a year ago. > Just try to tune back in to your body, forgive yourself, remind yourself> that however you eat, you keep on learning about yourself. and just try to> focus today on listening to your body again.

> This wasn't a failure, this was a learning experience!It feels so much like a failure, sigh. However, what is worse than this " being a failure " feeling is the thought of " oh no, this is happening

all over again " . You know, these episodes of losing weight and thengaining and gaining and gaining and gaining... without being able tocontrol the urge to JUST EAT.On days I notice a larger appetite or a strong drive to eat without

being hungry throw me into a panic. It was not THAT bad while I wasstill losing weight (though still a very unpleasant feeling). But nowthat I've gained it's horrible and scaring me. My health has improved

since I lost a bit of weight - I don't want to destroy that because theeating starts again!I wonder how long it will take until theseeating-more-than-is-good-for-me days won't scare me that much anymore. A

few months ago I was able to deal with a single day of overeating and Icould relax the day after when I noticed a smaller appetite again. Eventwo days in a row was manageable but made me nervous. I hoped that this

would improve with time but what happened is that I took several stepsback. It's alarming to see how deeply ingrained eating/coping patternsare and that " newer, healthier patterns " are wiped out within days when

the going gets tough. It makes me feel disappointed, scared and weak. " Weak " seems to be the predomiant feeling lately when it comes to usingfood as a coping mechanism. I can't help the thoughts: " Look at what

you're doing (again)! Using food as a coping mechanism! Look at otherpeople. They don't have to do that! They're man/woman enough to getthrough hard times without having to stuff themselves and being fat! "

I envy these people and I feel shame and inferior because I need (andobviously always needed and maybe will always need) FOOD to cope withthe hard things in life and everyone is able to see my weakness (visible

fat).This is really depressing and scary.Regardss.