My eating obstacle course today...Two out of three...not bad...:)

[Guest guest]

So, I went to a panel discussion on a green/sustainability initiative

in my area today for the second day in a row. They served food at the

event yesterday...so I knew that they would be serving food again

today. Well yesterday, I was successful at honoring my body cues

somewhat...when my mouth told me that I had enough of a chocolate cup

I was knawing on, I threw it away. Yay! Yet, I ate when I wasn't quite

hungry and threw my body off. I came home last night and felt

compelled to eat again though I wasn't hungry and got a stomach ache.

Day 2:

Challenge 1: Food Offered at Reception

Today, I ate again when I wasn't hungry because food was offered at

the post-forum reception. Some part of me feels like I would be

missing out if I didn't eat it. There's just something about someone

else preparing free visually appetizing foods that still overrides my

better sense. I also realized that food calms me in these settings...I

don't like mingling and talking about whatever...I'd rather sit and

have a more intimate conversation. Guess what? I got the same antsy

feeling about food when I arrived home again...I wanted to eat when I

wasn't hungry.

Challenge 2: Gas Station Convenience Store

On my return home, I went to a gas station with my mom. I've noticed

that I always feel compelled to buy some food product when I go into a

gas station convenience store. Rows and rows of candy bars, chips,

cookies, sodas...sensory overload...must buy...must buy. I realized

that I felt this pressure, I really felt the pressure, and noticed

that I could buy something and I really didn't want anything. I walked

out of the store without buying something. Woo Hoo! Walking out of

that store without something felt like lifting heavy weights. I hope

one day to be immune from feeling that pressure.

Challenge 3: Arrival Home - Still Antsy

I still wanted to get rid of the antsy feeling created by eating when

I wasn't hungry at the reception. I went into the kitchen...ate a

couple of grapes. Thought to myself, just drink some water and see if

your body state changes. Drank some water and sat with myself. The

antsy feeling went away! More heavy lifting.

I saw something today...when I eat when I'm not hungry, it causes a

sort of chain reaction...I'm more likely to eat when not hungry again.

I can offer myself something just as appetizing and prepared by

someone else at a later point in the day when I'm actually hungry to

prevent my compulsion to eat during these events and eliminate

feelings of deprivation. Convenience stores cause sensory overload for

me. I've experienced time and again how my body state will change by

just sitting with myself. Definitely heavy lifting and I'm getting

stronger.

Two out of three is pretty good.

L.