RE: Help-911

[Guest guest]

Lori you can add me to the last bit .. I've really slacked on vitamins,

food, exericse & I do NOT know why .. I am doing this bad behaviour .. I am

14 months post op and up until the last few months I could have been a

poster child for wls .. exericsing, supplementing, water, walking, etc ..

Just wanted you to know you aren't alone. Feel free to email me. Focus on

how far you've come you're doing great! Hopefully that 10 lbs will slip

right back off.

Hugs

Lyssa

Help-911

Hello all,

I joined this list about 2-3 weeks ago and have been

absolutely amazed and the support and knowledge this

group offers. I am enlisting in this support and

knowledge now as I need it desperately.

My name is Lori. I am 28 years old and I live in San

Diego. I had my surgery through Pacific Bariatric in

July 1999. I went into surgery weighing 407lbs and

got down to 239lbs (NOWHERE near where I wanted to

get). I am now back up to 249lbs (obviously meaning

I've regained 10 lbs) HELP! I need to keep going

down, NOT UP! I am 13 months post op and am

desperately afraid I've lost my " window of

opportunity " I've read from several people on here

that is just not true but I'm still scared. I'm

eating horrible things, not taking my vitamins and

supplements correctly and eating a lot more than I

used to. I haven't been to the gym in about 2 months

and I don't know why I'm going back to being so self

destructive. I know what I need to be doing but I am

not doing it. ANY advice and support is most welcome.

Thanks in advance

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 08/27/2000 1:30:24 PM Pacific Daylight Time,

ladylori_99@... writes:

> My name is Lori. I am 28 years old and I live in San

> Diego. I had my surgery through Pacific Bariatric in

> July 1999. I went into surgery weighing 407lbs and

> got down to 239lbs (NOWHERE near where I wanted to

> get). I am now back up to 249lbs (obviously meaning

> I've regained 10 lbs) HELP! I need to keep going

> down, NOT UP! I am 13 months post op and am

> desperately afraid I've lost my " window of

> opportunity " I've read from several people on here

> that is just not true but I'm still scared. I'm

> eating horrible things, not taking my vitamins and

> supplements correctly and eating a lot more than I

> used to. I haven't been to the gym in about 2 months

> and I don't know why I'm going back to being so self

> destructive. I know what I need to be doing but I am

> not doing it. ANY advice and support is most welcome.

> Thanks in advance

>

Hi Lori,

Sounds like you are living to eat, rather than eating to live, just

like the pre op days! Don't worry, there are lots of us for whom surgery

didn't produce the magic result of effortlessly obtaining our " ideal weight

range. " The fact is less than 10 - 15 % of all WLS patients, regardless of

procedure, attain and maintain that ideal weight range . . . so relax and

quit beating yourself up, PLEASE! If beating ourselves up made us slim and

healthy, none of us would have had to resort to surgery try and lose weight

and regain our health in the first place, would we have? So, know that

doesn't work and stop doing it! Focus is everything, so start focusing on

what you've gained (NOT THE 10 POUNDS) rather than what you haven't lost.

Make a list of 20 ways your life is better than it was 13 months ago and keep

it handy for reference. I bet there is a lot of things you can do and do do

everyday that you couldn't do 13 months ago. Let that be your foundation and

be the basis of why you move forward from now on!

Two of the problems with (most not all) the bariatric surgery

programs is that one, they do the same procedure on every patient (most

programs not all) and the second one is that they fail to understand the

importance of post op support and follow up. There isn't any good follow up

in any of the programs in San Diego, although Alvarado did a study and

published the results that show FOLLOW UP MATTERS as does frequency and

attendance! (More is more and better.) I think those of us that participate

in online groups have an advantage as well as long as we participate! The

success rate of online people seems to be higher than in the general WLS

population, BUT that could be because most are in the honeymoon phase and not

3 - 10 years post op when the regain occurs. There aren't long term studies

for the most common surgeries performed now. The fact is surgery just

doesn't change our relationship with food it only changes the mechanics.

Regardless of the surgery we have, we still need to learn to eat in

response to the needs of our body. If you don't have good nutrition and

meet its needs you are going feel it, tired, listless, lightheaded, faint,

cranky, ect. Before surgery, the only thing *I* tried to lose weight was

drugs, dieting or nutrition and exercise. Surgery was my last desperate

attempt to lose weight and for the first time, it was a matter of health not

appearance. Nothing *I* tried including surgery was natural or done with the

cooperation of my body so it wasn't sustainable for a lifetime. Calories

decide weight, exercise determines fitness . . . most of us can't exercise

enough to change our weight without changing the way we eat as well.

Anyhow (sorry so long), I quit losing weight at 4 months post op and

it wasn't a plateau as I could graze in enough calories to maintain roughly

210 pounds with my metabolism. The fact was, I ate " just because " . . . just

because it was time, because the food was there, because I wanted to eat it,

because I thought something would taste good. I didn't binge or do anything

like that, but I did eat compulsively. I figured out that because of the way

I ate, I wasn't going to be slim and healthy again like I dreamed. I still

lived to eat. My eating wasn't and never had been connected to the

physical needs of my body. I had heard many successful people say they often

forgot to eat. I was still too food focused to ever forget to eat! When I

realized that, I decided to find out what people that didn't have a weight

problem knew that I didn't. I just figured that surgery gave me a head start

and had undone some of the damage I had done to my stomach by often eating to

extreme fullness, was thankful and moved on.

Since I had once been a very successful sales trainer I had been to

many seminars of the top success motivators. And I remembered that if you

want something, you need to think and act the way somebody that is successful

in that same area does. I also knew that if you do the same thing over and

over you will get the same results every time. The only thing that ever

happened dieting was weight gain, so I knew there were no new diets to try.

I then defined what I wanted. I want to be a slim person rather than a fat

person that lost weight and fights to keep it off. I knew if ate, behaved,

and thought like a slim person (not a dieter) that eventually I would become

a slim person. The only problem was I didn't really know how slim people

(that don't diet) think or eat. I knew they ate less than me (even post op)

but didn't need 'will power' to stop like I did. Like I've done all my adult

life, I went to a book store to look for the answer. There had to be a book

that could teach me how to be slim. I went to the diet and health section

and started at the A's . . . it was all the same authors with new and

improved crap, or new authors with the same stuff in different covers . . .

Until I found, " The Seven Secrets Of Slim People. "

I have followed the book since I was 4 months post op. I have lost

down to my ideal weight range without effort or struggle. I am 20 months post

op and still losing. My relationship with food is different than it ever has

been in my life. I don't have willpower because I don't need it. I finally

feel strong and healthy and at peace with food . . . OH, I sometimes get busy

and forget to eat . . . ) There is a chapter by chapter outline at the

bottom. Good luck! You can get back on track and succeed!.

) Vicki In CA

The Seven Secrets of Slim People

by Vikki Hansen, MSW and Goodman

The Dieting Crisis - It Has Fatal Consequences

Excess weight and overeating have reached epidemic proportions in

America. 75% of Americans are overweight and over 30% are clinically obese.

Americans are the most nutritionally educated, health-conscious and yet

fattest nation in the world. For the first time, most Americans have now

learned and experienced that diets don't work. They know that the current

trend of 'lifestyle' diets don't work. They know indisputably, now, that diet

drugs don't work, are often harmful and can even be deadly.

They still do not know how to stop overeating. The are desperate for

a solution to their eating problem. Without at simple, viable method to

become a normal eater, they will turn again and again to the next 'miracle

diet'. And each time the miracle fails, as it almost always does, they blame

themselves. Vikki and are passionate about treating the problems of

overeating and dieting. They both began as normal-eating children. Like the

majority of Americans, though, they quickly graduated into many years of

painful overeating, excess weight and compulsive dieting.

Thirteen years ago, Vikki developed the 'seven secrets' method, and

since then she has been teaching this method around the world to people of

all ages and backgrounds and to eating disorder and medical professionals.

The Seven Secrets of Slim People method is not a gimmick. It is a permanent

solution to an epidemic problem, and it has been medically endorsed. There

are no complicated diets, no food restrictions or deprivation.

Vikki and have worked with thousands of people. Their clients,

like most, have been plagues for years by dieting and overeating. The same

people, now, will never have to diet again. The eat whatever they want and

have their ideal bodies. The are completely free from the obsession of

overeating and eat like normal eaters. We hear them say over and over again

that their triumph over weight and eating almost seems 'to good to be true.'

They are the inspiration for the book.

Chapters

Chapter 1: How Does Weight Control Damage You?

American Women and Weight, American Girls and Weight, It's Not Your Fault

- You Are Not Alone

Chapter 2: Dieting Has Made You Fatter

Why Diets Fail, Why Do Diets Make You Fatter?, Diets Are For People Who Are

Too Slim, If It Doesn't Work, Why Do You Keep On Dieting?, Which Came

First, Fat or Slim? One Diet Can Create An Eating Disorder

Chapter 3: Weight Is Not You Problem

What Is Your Real Problem?, How Can You Pick the Right Solution?, If You

Think Weight Is The Problem you'll Choose the Wrong Solution, You're not

Crazy; You're Only Making Yourself Crazy, Hating Your Body Doesn't Make It

Slimmer, What Is the Answer? The Seven Secrets of Slim People

Chapter 4: Secret #1. Listen to Your Body, Not Your Mind

Perfect Eating, Imperfect Eating, Distorted Eating, What Is a " Naturally "

Slim or a " Normal " Eater?, Who Are Naturally Slim People?, How Do the

Naturally Slim Eat?, Is Variation in Body Size Natural? Why Don't You Try

to Become Taller or Shorter? Is Weight as Impossible to Control As Height?

Why Is Obesity Nonexistent in the Wild? Listen to and Trust Your Body,

Week-One Assignments

Chapter 5: Secret #2. Eat With Awareness and Without Judgment

Become A Scientific Observer of Your Own Body, You Can't Make A Mistake ,

Being Conscious of Your Eating May Feel Odd at First, A Conscious Eating

Experiment, Eat Consciously, Disconnect the Eating Machine, Eat What You

Want In Front of Anyone Week-Two Assignments

Chapter 6: Secret #3. Eat When You Are Only Physically Hungry

What Does Physical Hunger Feel Like?, Other Signs of True Hunger, More

Hunger Hints, Assess Your Hunger Level, Pleasure Is the Key, Eat a Fist Size

of Food - Your Personal Portion Guide, Stop Preventative Eating, Stop Being

an " Efficient Eater " Week-Three Assignments

Chapter 7: Secret #4. Stop Eating When You Are Satisfied, Not Full

When Does Your Body Want To Stop Eating?, Your Body Never Wants to be Full,

When You Find It Hard to Stop at Satisfaction, Resign from the

" Clean-Your-Plate-Club " , Get Your " Money's Worth " by Increasing Your

Awareness of the Total Experience, Week-Four Assignments

Chapter 8: Secret #5. Eat What You Want Most

Is This Too Good To Be True?, Myth - You Can't Get Fat If You Don't Eat Fat,

Eat Anything in the World You Want, Successful Weight Loss Always Involves

a Limit, Never Deprive, Carry A Binge Food With You Everywhere,

Deliberately Have a Conscious Binge, Fill You House With All Of Your

Favorite Foods, Week-Five Assignments

Chapter 9: Secret #6. Notice How Your Body Feels After Eating

Your Body Regulates Nutrition as Well As Weight, Give Your Body What It Most

Wants to Eat, Identify Body Cravings, " Won't I Crave the Food I'm Addicted

Too? " , Food Combinations, Everyday Is Different, The Role Of Liquids, The

Pleasure/Pain Principle, Week-Six Assignments

Chapter 10: Secret #7. Honor Your Feelings, Don't Bury Them Under Food

Eating Has Been Your Life Preserver, Breaking the Overeating Spiral,

Non-Hunger Eating, How Food Keeps You Stuck, The Non-Hunger Eating Urge Is

You Best Friend, The Core Problem Is: Lack of Self-Love, You Cannot Love

Someone You Do Not Trust, The Stages of Becoming a Normal Eater, Week-Seven

Assignments

Congratulations!, Key Points

Chapter 11: To Be Slim For Life, You Must Adopt the Attitudes of The

Naturally Slim

Your " Control Attitude " - Lose It, Cultivate Your Naturally Slim Attitude,

Be Kind and Compassionate With Yourself, Be Curious- Not Critical, You Can't

Avoid the Learning Curve, Have Endless Patience, Accept and Celebrate Your

Body, Be Willing to Heal at Your Own Pace, Recovery Is..., Listen to and

Trust Yourself

Chapter 12: Questions and Answers

" What Is My Ideal Weight? "

" But Every time I Look In the Mirror, I Hate What I See "

" Shall I Weigh Myself? "

" I Don't Want To Buy New Clothes Until I'm Slimmer "

" I Just Overate, Now What? "

" Should I Tell My Friends What I'm Doing? "

" How Do I Get 'My Share' Without Seeming Selfish? "

" If I Eat Other Than At Lunchtime, My Boss Will Kill Me "

" Is There Any Way To Make Sure I'm Hungry for a Lunch Date? "

" How Do You Eat Only for Hunger with a Family? "

" Don't I have To Eat When Others Do in Order to Be Sociable? "

" I'm Afraid I'll Be Judged If I Eat Something Fattening, Since I'm Not Slim "

" Where Does Exercise Fit In? "

" I Feel Fat "

" I'm Eating Just Like You Said, and I'm Not Losing Weight? "

If You Have More Questions

Excerpt from Chapter Nine:

Give Your Body What It Most Wants To Eat

Perfect eating for ideal health and weight depends on your continuing to

fine-tune your awareness of how your body likes the foods you are putting

into it.

The ways to make a good food-to-body match are:

· What are you craving when you are hungry?

· If you eat it, does it taste great?

· If it's the body craving, the food will taste phenomenal.

· How does your body feel 30 minutes to a few hours after eating the food? If

the food was a good body match, you'll feel great.

· If the food was a bad match, you'll have acid, gas, pain, nausea,

discomfort, etc.

There are only two reasons your body will feel bad after eating when you are

hungry:

· You made a bad match, or a bad combination of foods.

· You ate too much food even if it was a good match.

[Guest guest]

Patti

Thats great you are joining a gym. I do have a membership and I promised

myself that I would go on Wed .. when my 9 yr old starts back to school.

Hopefully that will be a routine I can get back into. Well for the last 2

days I've taken my vitamins (woohoo) and I'll have to try and go back over

the posts to see about this calcium citrate (is that right?) I haven't been

supplement calcium other than the viactivs. Are those ok?

Well food wise I've been horrible too. I am going back on a low carb diet

(as prescribed by my surgeon) its not regimented if I want fruit or bread I

will have it but my main goal is get the protein in and cut out the sugar. A

good starting point for me.

I went to the store tonight & stocked up on what I needed.

I'm going to make a bit pitcher of crystal lite tomorrow too and make sure

I'm drinking my fluids.

Thats great that you found a surgeon for continued care. Did work take you

to FL? Do you like it? How do you get a scope and what is considered normal?

I will ask my surgeon but worried he'll say why do you want one and what

will you do with the results?

Take care!

We can do this!

Lyssa

[Guest guest]

Lyssa,

Yes, it is calcium citrate you want. I was taking Tums, but am of the opinion

now that they are not good enough.

Yes, my hubby got work out here. My home is Florida and I was very homesick out

there, even though I did meet some wonderful people.

I had the Endoscopy because I kept getting food stuck alot and they wanted to

make sure the stoma wasn't constricted too much. It wasn't, which means I am

either eating too fast or not chewing good enough or both.

I just had a Bone Density Scan. I will get the results the end of this week. I

got it mainly for a baseline.

Well take care and congratulations on your new committment in regards to food.

take care.

Love & Hugs,

Patti

" Too Blessed to be Stressed "

RNY 6/22/99 408

7/31/00 227

8/10/00 225

8/26/00 222

186 lbs Lost

http://pattiw.homestead.com/Patti2.html

http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/profile.phtml?N=Wethington924737743

Measurements: waist hips bust thigh neck

6/22/99 57 72 51 34 17

8/17/00 35 52 36 24 12

---- Original Message -----

From: LyssaF

To: Graduate-OSSGegroups

Sent: Sunday, August 27, 2000 9:16 PM

Subject: RE: Help-911

Patti

Thats great you are joining a gym. I do have a membership and I promised

myself that I would go on Wed .. when my 9 yr old starts back to school.

Hopefully that will be a routine I can get back into. Well for the last 2

days I've taken my vitamins (woohoo) and I'll have to try and go back over

the posts to see about this calcium citrate (is that right?) I haven't been

supplement calcium other than the viactivs. Are those ok?

Well food wise I've been horrible too. I am going back on a low carb diet

(as prescribed by my surgeon) its not regimented if I want fruit or bread I

will have it but my main goal is get the protein in and cut out the sugar. A

good starting point for me.

I went to the store tonight & stocked up on what I needed.

I'm going to make a bit pitcher of crystal lite tomorrow too and make sure

I'm drinking my fluids.

Thats great that you found a surgeon for continued care. Did work take you

to FL? Do you like it? How do you get a scope and what is considered normal?

I will ask my surgeon but worried he'll say why do you want one and what

will you do with the results?

Take care!

We can do this!

Lyssa

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[Guest guest]

Hi All,

May I also suggest the book: When Food Is Love by Geneen Roth - I have found

it to be an excellent book to help me start thinking about my " thoughts "

regarding food - I'm 12 years post op and have not gained back any weight -

but I still carry around some of the " baggage " and " old thinking " that

contributed (to some degree) in my weight issues to begin with - read this

book only 2 years ago and realized how much of that " old stuff " is still

" lurking " about.

Take care

Tracey