Last week... (long)

[Guest guest]

Hey all, just wanted to share a small success... Last Thursday and

Friday, I had a 2-day seminar at a really nice hotel, with upscale

quality food that I don't usually encounter. Thursday started with

lunch. Gourmet sandwiches with 3 kinds of salads with 3 kinds of

cheeses, lots of artisan breads and biscotti and cookies for

dessert. I had just eaten breakfast about an hour before and I

wasn't hungry, so guess what? I didn't eat! Everyone that I was

hanging out with was asking why I wasn't eating and I said I just

wasn't hungry. I got a lot of " good for you " and " I'm not hungry

either, but this is so good " kind of comments. The one woman there

who had had gastric bypass was the one who said, she wasn't hungry

but couldn't pass this up. Usually I would take something for later,

but the napkins were cloth, and I didn't think I could steal one.

Luckily, another woman had a zip-lock baggie and so I took a chicken

salad sandwich (with bleu cheese on foccacia bread with olive oil)

if I got hungry later. About 3pm, I was hungry, but they had snacks

for us then, too. I had just enough to feel satisfied. Then we had a

dinner later and it was divine. I ate just enough of each thing to

feel satisfied and everyone around the table (I was with the same

group for the 2-days) was saying " wasn't it good? " and " aren't you

hungry " . Yes, I was very hungry and the food was great, and I ate a

little of everything I wanted and felt really good, not stuffed.

Later that night, about 11, I was hungry again, so I ate my sandwich

that I took from lunch and it was so good! Not to mention all the

mints and chocolates and such that I got to take home. I haven't

eaten any of them yet.

Friday they had an amazing breakfast, eggs, sausage and bacon buffet

with croissants and danish and it was all amazing. I ate an egg and

1.1/2 slices bacon and a 1/2 a sausage , and a 1/2 apple danish. It

was so good and I was satisfied. About 10am they brought in more

snacks, but I didn't want any. At lunch, the meeting was over, but

they gave us box lunches with 3 kinds of sandwiches, kettle chips,

biscotti and a beautiful apple. I still wasn't hungry so I took most

of it home. About 2pm I was hungry so I ate some chips and 1 of the

sandwiches, the biscotti, and my horse got to enjoy that beautiful

apple.

It just felt really good to eat all that wonderful food without

feeling guilty, or eating just because it's there, or that I may not

be able to eat such gourmet food for a long time. I enjoyed it all

with no guilt or judgement. Taking some for later, if not hungry at

the moment, I still got to enjoy it all. I was satisfied, not full,

and ate way less that the woman who had had gastric bypass! There

were so many comments like, " I am not eating all wekend after this " ,

or " I ate way too much the past 2 days " , or " I'm dieting tomorrow. "

I am so glad to be OFF of that merry-go-round. Before IE, I would

have been right there, eating everything because it's free, and it's

expensive food I don't usually get to eat, or eating a lot of bacon

(one of my favorites), because it is usually forbidden. Telling

myself it is a free-for-all and the diet starts tomorrow is a thing

of the past, thank goodness. It did feel weird eating less that the

woman who had gastric bypass. I had talked to her about the surgery

in the past, when I was considering it myself before finding IE, and

she still says that she has so many issues with food. Surgery takes

care of a symptom, but she still takes too much food, even though

she knows she can't eat it all, and still has all the eating issues

she had before.

Anyway, sorry so long, but it feels so different to be able to enjoy

something like this, and still feel so normal. No arguing with

myself, no guilt. It was really nice.

Meg

IE since Feb '08