Re: What an absolutely horrible night!!

[Guest guest]

Its nasty when others can intrude into our peace. About the only thing

I can think of to say to you is that this is HIS problem and he is

trying to make it YOUR problem. I can't help but wonder what he would

say/do if you flat out told him the same - " What ever YOUR problem is,

deal with it yourself. And if you find that something in me triggers

YOU, do us both a favor - stay away from me! "

Good for you to let the anger be anger. Its totally valid and you have

been unjustly hurt. If boxing helps do it. But it sounds to me like

you are really trying to understand this for YOURSELF and that is

excellent too. Another trick you may want to see if it works for you

is to try and picture this goon as a raging toddler, complete with

droopy diapers throwing a tantrum ;-) This could help you disconnect

from him? Or play the 'turn down the volume' trick where you mentally

reduce his voice to 'mute' and watch him mouth his nastiness without

any words. Believe me, as an 'active aggressive' type PASSIVE

aggressives drive me mad(der). If you don't buy into his rage, he MAY

pick on another person who will? Have you talked to any other workers

where you are that share this difficulty with this person? You may not

be the lone ranger ;-)

Again, good job for not letting this drive you to eat.

BEST to you, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> I am so angry and getting more angry as the day wears on. I'm not sure

> what to do. I will not eat as I'm too mad to do that anyway. I had an

> absolutely horrible, horrible night with an absolutely horrible man who

> hates women or just me - I don't know. First time I've worked with him

> have met him in past and do not care for him. He has for no reason had

> it out for me since I started working. I had to tell him off a few

> times last night but his retched treatment of me persisted all night.

> Today I am trying to sit with this anger that grows, however, I would

> like it to cease. Don't know what to do. I should go boxing. When I

> did eat today so far I have eaten for hunger and tried to be mindful of

> what and how and how much I was eating, it was a real chore. I do not

> want to stuff myself silly or mindlessly eat everything to numb this

> anger. Maybe I'll paint.

>

> Thanks,

> J.

>

[Guest guest]

I am starting to feel a little better. I read some posts and decided

to post and am glad I did. Thanks so much to both of you, you've

really given me some great ideas/insight and made me laugh in the

process. I am trying to deal with this anger and see if I can get it

simmered and so far so good. That is a big one for me as normally I

would let it eat me up and I would sit mindlessly and eat and eat and

eat and eat until I could no longer move. I will never work with

this man again - that is a given. The image I have of him is a

puppeteer but I have no strings and this infuriates him. I will enjoy

and nice dinner and evening with my loving husband.

Thanks so much,

J.

> >

> > I am so angry and getting more angry as the day wears on. I'm

not sure

> > what to do. I will not eat as I'm too mad to do that anyway. I

had an

> > absolutely horrible, horrible night with an absolutely horrible

man who

> > hates women or just me - I don't know. First time I've worked

with him

> > have met him in past and do not care for him. He has for no

reason had

> > it out for me since I started working. I had to tell him off a

few

> > times last night but his retched treatment of me persisted all

night.

> > Today I am trying to sit with this anger that grows, however, I

would

> > like it to cease. Don't know what to do. I should go boxing.

When I

> > did eat today so far I have eaten for hunger and tried to be

mindful of

> > what and how and how much I was eating, it was a real chore. I

do not

> > want to stuff myself silly or mindlessly eat everything to numb

this

> > anger. Maybe I'll paint.

> >

> > Thanks,

> > J.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

" Another trick you may want to see if it works for you

is to try and picture this goon as a raging toddler, complete with

droopy diapers throwing a tantrum ;-) This could help you disconnect

from him? Or play the 'turn down the volume' trick where you mentally

reduce his voice to 'mute' and watch him mouth his nastiness without

any words. "

I LOVE this!!! Thanks for the visual. It's definitely something that

will come in handy!

dawnz:)

> >

> > I am so angry and getting more angry as the day wears on. I'm not

sure

> > what to do. I will not eat as I'm too mad to do that anyway. I

had an

> > absolutely horrible, horrible night with an absolutely horrible

man who

> > hates women or just me - I don't know. First time I've worked

with him

> > have met him in past and do not care for him. He has for no

reason had

> > it out for me since I started working. I had to tell him off a few

> > times last night but his retched treatment of me persisted all

night.

> > Today I am trying to sit with this anger that grows, however, I would

> > like it to cease. Don't know what to do. I should go boxing.

When I

> > did eat today so far I have eaten for hunger and tried to be

mindful of

> > what and how and how much I was eating, it was a real chore. I do

not

> > want to stuff myself silly or mindlessly eat everything to numb this

> > anger. Maybe I'll paint.

> >

> > Thanks,

> > J.

> >

>