Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 Gwynne...my daughter Zoe, was also "self-destructive and troubled" and when I wrote Judy earlier, talking with her is harder because we have been estranged for so many years. It's so much better now and she turned her life around about 4 years ago. She is still maturing from a life of drugs. Oh I thank God for our kids who have "turned around" from anything! Sometimes I ask God to open a door for me (anything) and I realize in hindsight, He did! Zoe and I communicate at least once a day and there were many years when once a year was painful. Mama-Sher, 69; IPF, 3-06, OR.Don't fret about tomorrow, God is already there! grief Judy B,My heart aches over the situation with your daughter. Mydaughter is 23 and isn't dealing well with my illness either.I can't expect her to be okay with the fact that her fathercommitted suicide when she was 8, and her 56-year-oldmother has a terminal illness. She will talk about it onlyin brief spurts. She and my son are definitely alreadygrieving, even though on the surface Kate seems to bedoing fine. The timing of all this is terrible, as she onlyturned her life around 3 years ago after being self-destructive and troubled. We were kind of making upfor lost time, and then WHAM - this diagnosis. Unlikeme, Kate's still not great at openly and honestlyexpressing her emotions. Both she and my son live3 hours away, and I think they do feel guilt about notbeing physically closer to provide more support.Fortunately, my son will talk about any and everythingwith me, not that it's easy or pleasant. He's SO sweetand supportive. He's 28, and my daughter-in-law isvery special and dear to my heart too.If you two have always been close, I believe that thingswill work themselves out somehow. You will find a wayto lovingly say to her what you need to say, in a way thatgives you peace and helps ease her mind and her pain later.You will ease the way for her to say what she needs tosay, by being an approachable mother. Parenting's anincredibly hard job, even when you're baby's 44.None of us knows exactly how long we'll be here, butthis disease gives us reason to begin grieving early. Italso teaches us to cherish the sanctity of life, and togive to God what we cannot do for ourselves. You're inmy prayers.Hugs and blessings,Gwynne IPF 7/04 listed for transplant 3/07 Texas Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2008 Report Share Posted January 9, 2008 Welcome and sorry you have to find us but glad that you did. As you see already every one here is with open arms and very supportive and informational and everything else. I hope your getting all your questions answered and remember we are always here for you! Sandie suffering succotash, WI 2007, 37 > > > > It could be they do not want to face losing you. I know that my family > finds it hard to realize that i am dying. That option was always there > but no one wants a specific time frame. I know I have trouble myself > accepting IPF. I find no fault at them wanting me forever but forever is > sometimes shorter than we think. Love you all. > > > > > > grief > > > > > > Judy B, > > My heart aches over the situation with your daughter. My > > daughter is 23 and isn't dealing well with my illness either. > > I can't expect her to be okay with the fact that her father > > committed suicide when she was 8, and her 56-year-old > > mother has a terminal illness. She will talk about it only > > in brief spurts. She and my son are definitely already > > grieving, even though on the surface Kate seems to be > > doing fine. The timing of all this is terrible, as she only > > turned her life around 3 years ago after being self- > > destructive and troubled. We were kind of making up > > for lost time, and then WHAM - this diagnosis. Unlike > > me, Kate's still not great at openly and honestly > > expressing her emotions. Both she and my son live > > 3 hours away, and I think they do feel guilt about not > > being physically closer to provide more support. > > Fortunately, my son will talk about any and everything > > with me, not that it's easy or pleasant. He's SO sweet > > and supportive. He's 28, and my daughter-in- law is > > very special and dear to my heart too. > > > > If you two have always been close, I believe that things > > will work themselves out somehow. You will find a way > > to lovingly say to her what you need to say, in a way that > > gives you peace and helps ease her mind and her pain later. > > You will ease the way for her to say what she needs to > > say, by being an approachable mother. Parenting's an > > incredibly hard job, even when you're baby's 44. > > > > None of us knows exactly how long we'll be here, but > > this disease gives us reason to begin grieving early. It > > also teaches us to cherish the sanctity of life, and to > > give to God what we cannot do for ourselves. You're in > > my prayers. > > > > Hugs and blessings, > > Gwynne IPF 7/04 listed for transplant 3/07 Texas > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2008 Report Share Posted January 9, 2008 TRUE, TRUE. I told the other day I a still not afraid of death but this dying part is really hard. I Hate not being able to get a good breath. Hate not being able to make my bed. Hate that I have just had to order a larger flow concentrator. HATE this disease. All that being said, I insist on having a good day. It is about 75 outside and I am headed to the porch. Love and Prayers, Peggy ipf 6/04 Florida"Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." Yes, but at some point an adult child should think of us and what WE need. This dying is about us. It is so good to come here.....if nothing else, we can say the words that no one else wants to hear. God's blessings.Hugs, Joyce D.PULMONARY FIBROSIS/LUPUS 1997 BRONCHIECTASIS 2004 INDIANA 2 COR. 12:10 ....when I am weak, then I am strong.>> It could be they do not want to face losing you. I know that my family finds it hard to realize that i am dying. That option was always there but no one wants a specific time frame. I know I have trouble myself accepting IPF. I find no fault at them wanting me forever but forever is sometimes shorter than we think. Love you all.> > > grief> > > Judy B,> My heart aches over the situation with your daughter. My> daughter is 23 and isn't dealing well with my illness either.> I can't expect her to be okay with the fact that her father> committed suicide when she was 8, and her 56-year-old> mother has a terminal illness. She will talk about it only> in brief spurts. She and my son are definitely already> grieving, even though on the surface Kate seems to be> doing fine. The timing of all this is terrible, as she only> turned her life around 3 years ago after being self-> destructive and troubled. We were kind of making up> for lost time, and then WHAM - this diagnosis. Unlike> me, Kate's still not great at openly and honestly> expressing her emotions. Both she and my son live> 3 hours away, and I think they do feel guilt about not> being physically closer to provide more support.> Fortunately, my son will talk about any and everything> with me, not that it's easy or pleasant. He's SO sweet> and supportive. He's 28, and my daughter-in- law is> very special and dear to my heart too.> > If you two have always been close, I believe that things> will work themselves out somehow. You will find a way> to lovingly say to her what you need to say, in a way that> gives you peace and helps ease her mind and her pain later.> You will ease the way for her to say what she needs to> say, by being an approachable mother. Parenting's an> incredibly hard job, even when you're baby's 44.> > None of us knows exactly how long we'll be here, but> this disease gives us reason to begin grieving early. It> also teaches us to cherish the sanctity of life, and to> give to God what we cannot do for ourselves. You're in> my prayers.> > Hugs and blessings,> Gwynne IPF 7/04 listed for transplant 3/07 Texas> > > > > > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage.> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2008 Report Share Posted January 9, 2008 Peggy... ahhh, that wonderful porch. I can close my eyes and go there with you! Mama-Sher, 69; IPF, 3-06, OR.Don't fret about tomorrow, God is already there! grief> > > Judy B,> My heart aches over the situation with your daughter. My> daughter is 23 and isn't dealing well with my illness either.> I can't expect her to be okay with the fact that her father> committed suicide when she was 8, and her 56-year-old> mother has a terminal illness. She will talk about it only> in brief spurts. She and my son are definitely already> grieving, even though on the surface Kate seems to be> doing fine. The timing of all this is terrible, as she only> turned her life around 3 years ago after being self-> destructive and troubled. We were kind of making up> for lost time, and then WHAM - this diagnosis. Unlike> me, Kate's still not great at openly and honestly> expressing her emotions. Both she and my son live> 3 hours away, and I think they do feel guilt about not> being physically closer to provide more support.> Fortunately, my son will talk about any and everything> with me, not that it's easy or pleasant. He's SO sweet> and supportive. He's 28, and my daughter-in- law is> very special and dear to my heart too.> > If you two have always been close, I believe that things> will work themselves out somehow. You will find a way> to lovingly say to her what you need to say, in a way that> gives you peace and helps ease her mind and her pain later.> You will ease the way for her to say what she needs to> say, by being an approachable mother. Parenting's an> incredibly hard job, even when you're baby's 44.> > None of us knows exactly how long we'll be here, but> this disease gives us reason to begin grieving early. It> also teaches us to cherish the sanctity of life, and to> give to God what we cannot do for ourselves. You're in> my prayers.> > Hugs and blessings,> Gwynne IPF 7/04 listed for transplant 3/07 Texas> > > > > > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage.> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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