Guest guest Posted January 3, 2008 Report Share Posted January 3, 2008 I'm limited. I can live with that. Most of the time I'm not a burden at this point. However, I do feel that way like Monday when insisted on taking me to the ER. I knew she'd be mad if I didn't call, but I'm trying to impress on her that when she's teaching and other times, she can't always do that, that this is part of my life now. I will have more ER appearances, just like more MC gigs. We left here at 1:30 and got to my home with the prescriptions and 's at 10:30. I felt like I'd robbed her of 9 hours, basically one day of her life, and I don't like doing that. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm feeling scared, guilty, worried, down > > > > > > > > > > I hate what is happening to me > > > > > > > > > > I hate that there is no cure > > > > > > > > > > I hate that they can't give me a prognosis > > > > > > > > > > I hate having to worry about every little thing. > > > > > > > > > > I hate that I can't just get on an do stuff > > > > > > > > > > I hate the idea that I might not see my baby grow up. > > > > > > > > > > I hate that she's got to live life with a mum that isn't > firing > > > on all > > > > > cylinders. > > > > > > > > > > I hate that I have to curtail one of my hobbies. > > > > > > > > > > I hate that I have to plan going out so that I don't run out > of > > > O2 > > > > > > > > > > I've tried to talk to Rob, but I end up 'pulling my self > > > together' and > > > > > saying 'don't mind me, I'm fine really' And I'm doing this not > > > to upset > > > > > him too much. I don't know if he really knows the full > > > implications of > > > > > PF, and I don't know how to bring it up. > > > > > > > > > > But I'm not Ok right now. > > > > > > > > > > I want to scream and shout and rage at the unfairness of it > all > > > (except > > > > > that I'd get too out of breath [8-|] I can't even have a damn > > > good > > > > > laugh at anything as it makes me cough too much [] ) > > > > > > > > > > My father is having a second op following problems with a hip > > > > > replacement, and I was his main carer, (frankly my brother is > > > useless > > > > > and selfish when it comes to looking after dad, happy to > borrow > > > dads > > > > > car, but not so good at running errands) so I'm now worrying > at > > > how he's > > > > > going to cope > > > > > > > > > > And to top everything I have a wisdom tooth causing me lots of > > > problems, > > > > > it started last night, so I won't get to a dentist until at > > > least > > > > > tomorrow and I need to see a doctor tomorrow as I'm starting > to > > > get a > > > > > cough as well [8-|] > > > > > > > > > > Right now, I've just had enough and I want to step out of my > > > body for a > > > > > little while and hop into someone elses while it get's on with > > > it. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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