Re: Gwynne/Tina/Joyce

[Guest guest]

I do understand so what Joyce just said. I am so new and in such

relatively good health compared to those waiting for their

transplants. So, in February I'm going to go talk and listen and see

about evaluation. I can't tell you how I'll feel about one if I'm a

candidate and when the time comes I need one and if I get on the

list. I just know I want to explore and keep the doors open and not

prematurely make a decision. I do know in Tina's situation I think

I'd be fighting for one simply because of Kaleb, but I don't honestly

know. I know I don't have the same reason, Kaleb, and that same

burden, although wish I did have such a wonderful kid and reason to

fight.

Joyce is age confused. I sure am. I'm 58 but in spirit I'm in my 30's

and then when I spend the day in ER or think of my disease some days

I'm 75 or 80. My body and spirit don't match up and its very

confusing to say the least. Some of my best friends are in their 20's

and I feel right at home talking to them. Then I feel like I should

be going to the Senior Center more and playing cards or something.

But its this way with all of us. Oh my, you sit and talk with and

look at Gwynne and you see a much younger woman in spirit, attitudes

toward life and appearance. Yet, I know on the days recently with the

scare, the depression and Misha's problems she's felt very old. I

know its got to be confusing to our friends. Oh well, I'm 13 going on

80 and thats the way it is.

Again, to Tina, what shines through your words is a woman who still

has a lot of fight left and wants her transplant. Frustrated, yes.

Afraid to admit how much you want it for fear of disappointment, yes.

But in the short time you've been here, we've seen the determination

and fortitude. There are a lot of good hands here to hold. Just grab

the one that fits for the day and keep moving forward. We'll pull

when we can and if we can't do that we'll stand behind and push

unless you tell us to stop and I don't see that happening.

> > >

> > > To all,

> > > I'm battling depression right now... crashed after

> > > the party. It isn't too severe and there are no tears,

> > > but I think 10 months of waiting have started to

> > > cause a constant kind of low-level anxiety in me.

> > > Especially since I spend more time in bed when

> > > I'm at home these days, it just emphasizes the

> > > point. I'm on meds, which I know help, but it takes

> > > a lot of grit to live with this thing, and it does

> > > take a toll as you go along, no matter how

> > > well-grounded you are for the most part.

> > > Plus, I'll find out in a few days if Misha has a

> > > progressive liver disease, which never leaves my

> > > mind. She did get to come home today in hopes

> > > that she'd eat (it had been 4 days) - and she did.

> > > And I'm worried about Joyce, , Peggy,

> > > Bruce, and Zena and everyone else who is struggling

> > > extra hard to stay well and maintain quality of

> > > life. God bless you all.

> > >

> > > Bruce,

> > > You must get well right away. That's all there is

> > > to it. Lean pockets and rest for you, my friend.

> > > I do wish I could have been a fly on the ER wall

> > > when you kicked arse. Way to go - look how far

> > > you've come, dude. Hugs to you.

> > >

> > > Sher,

> > > Thank you for the card. I hope this will be a year

> > > filled with all kinds of good things for you. Please

> > > do send us a photo of you and Rosebud.

> > >

> > > Sandie,

> > > I will be thinking of you at the doctor and hoping

> > > that some things will be resolved for you. We know

> > > there are more questions than answers when dealing

> > > with some of our types of illness, but I think you

> > > have better prepared yourself for whatever is to

> > > come. You are strong enough to handle it. I'll be

> > > anxious to hear what happens next.

> > >

> > > ,

> > > Thank goodness there's a post from you to start off

> > > the new year, but what an awful experience you had.

> > > These convulsions that you and Joyce had are

> > > horrifying. (I stay amazed that that hasn't happened

> > > to me yet, nor have I passed out, which I think is

> > > sort of incredible.) I'm sorry you are having to fight

> > > so very hard to breathe and to fight infection. My

> > > prayers are with you. You are so loved.

> > >

> > > Peggy,

> > > The Levaquin is a gift that just keeps on giving, huh?

> > > Bah. Hope you get relief on all counts starting NOW.

> > >

> > > Hugs,

> > > Gwynne IPF 7/04 listed for transplant 3/07 Texas

> > >

> >

>