Guest guest Posted January 9, 2008 Report Share Posted January 9, 2008 I agree. We're all entitled to our bad days, or bad weeks. With any serious illness can come depression. It's a natural reaction to hearing you have a terminal illness. The trick is in learning to understand the disease, and let yourself go through all the reactions. Panic was my first response, and I've been through all the rest. Anger, denial, grief.....and am finally, finally at the stage of just being at peace with having a terminal illness. Here's the rub. Any one of us could be killed in any manner of ways other than PF. My childhood friend (literally since the age of one year)was killed instantly on her way to work in November. She was 49 and left behind a daughter, and a brand new nephew. And a sad and bewildered friend in Texas. We don't really know the day or time of our demise. We know that we have an illness that will LIKELY take us, but that's not a definite. I haven't mentioned this before, but I think it's pertinent to this discussion. I have cervical cancer. It's mild, non-progressing, and under control, but it could spread at any time and move into my ovaries. We all know the prognosis from there.... I could also be killed by a tornado, an earthquake, in a vehicle accident, or by some new, as yet unknown to me disease.... I could have a heart attack from my lupus, or a stroke. Pulmonary embolism is always a concern. I don't spend my days dwelling on any of these. I spend my days trying to fill them with laughter, love, new experiences and finding ways to fight the good fight. If I die from PF, so be it. Odds are that I will. But I refuse to let it rule my life or dictate how my days are spent. I know depression is real, and a serious disease. Meds are necessary and a huge help. If you're depressed and can't seem to feel better by all means get some help and find a way to enjoy life again. Chaz asked me yesterday if I believed in reincarnation, and would I like to come back to this world again. I told him " oh my gosh NO, please don't put me through this again " . I don't want to endure this life again, but I will make the most of the time I have in the here and now. I'm not scolding anyone. We're all made differently, and we handle life and it's situations differently. I'm just saying please don't let PF or any disease kill you before you die from it. Give thanks for each day we're here, and know that something better is waiting when the roll is called. Hugs to you all, and peace. Babs in Texas > > > > > > > > It could be they do not > want to face losing you. I know that my > family finds it hard to realize that i am dying. That option was > always there but no one wants a specific time frame. I know I have > trouble myself accepting IPF. I find no fault at them wanting me > forever but forever is sometimes shorter than we think. Love you all. > > > > > > > > > > > > grief > > > > > > > & ! gt; > > > > Judy B, > > > > My heart aches over the situation with your daughter. My > > > > daughter is 23 and isn't dealing well with my illness either. > > > > I can't expect her to be okay with the fact that her father > > > > committed suicide when she was 8, and her 56-year-old > > > > mother has a terminal illness. She will talk about it only > > > > in brief spurts. She and my son are definitely already > > > > grieving, even though on the surface Kate seems to be > > > > doing fine. The timing of all this is terrible, as she only > > > > turned her life around 3 years ago after being self- > > > > destructive and troubled. We were kind of making up > > > > for lost time, and then WHAM - this diagnosis. Unlike > > > > me, Kate's still not great at openly > and honestly > > > > expressing her emotions. Both she and my son live > > > > 3 hours away, and I think they do feel guilt about not > > > > being physically closer to provide more support. > > > > Fortunate! ly, my s on will talk about any and everything > > > > with me, not that it's easy or pleasant. He's SO sweet > > > > and supportive. He's 28, and my daughter-in- law is > > > > very special and dear to my heart too. > > > > > > > > If you two have always been close, I believe that things > > > > will work themselves out somehow. You will find a way > > > > to lovingly say to her what you need to say, in a way that > > > > gives you peace and helps ease her mind and her pain later. > > > > You will ease the way for her to say what she needs to > > > > say, by being an approachable mother. Parenting's an > > > > > incredibly hard job, even when you're baby's 44. > > > > > > > > None of us knows exactly how long we'll be here, but > > > > this disease gives us reason to begin grieving early. It > > > > also teaches us to cherish the sanctity of life, and to > > > > give to God what we cannot do for ourselves. You're in > > > > my prayers. > > > > > > > > Hugs and blessings, > > > > Gwynne IPF 7/04 listed for transplant 3/07 Texas > > > > > > > > > > > ! > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ------------ --------- --------- --- > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? Find them fast with Yahoo! > > Search. > > > > > > > > > Be a better friend, newshound, and > know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. > > > > > > > > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-mkp{ > border:1px solid #d8d8d8;font-family:Arial;margin:14px 0px;padding:0px 14px;} > #ygrp-mkp hr{ > border:1px solid #d8d8d8;} > #ygrp-mkp #hd{ > color:#628c2a;font-size:85%;font-weight:bold;line- height:122%;margin:10px 0px;} > #ygrp-mkp #ads{ > margin-bottom:10px;} > #ygrp-mkp .ad{ > padding:0 0;} > #ygrp-mkp .ad a{ > color:#0000ff;text-decoration:none;} > --> > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc{ > font-family:Arial;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc #hd{ > margin:10px 0px;font-weight:bold;font-size:78%;line-height:122%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc .ad{ > margin-bottom:10px;padding:0 0;} > --> > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-mlmsg {font-size:13px;font-family:arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif;} > #ygrp-mlmsg table {font-size:inherit;font:100%;} > #ygrp-mlmsg select, input, textarea {font:99% arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif;} > #ygrp-mlmsg pre, code {font:115% monospace;} > #ygrp-mlmsg * {line-height:1.22em;} > #ygrp-text{ > font-family:Georgia; > } > #ygrp-text p{ > margin:0 0 1em 0;} > #ygrp-tpmsgs{ > font-family:Arial; > clear:both;} > #ygrp-vitnav{ > padding-top:10px;font-family:Verdana;font-size:77%;margin:0;} > #ygrp-vitnav a{ > padding:0 1px;} > #ygrp-actbar{ > clear:both;margin:25px 0;white-space:nowrap;color:#666;text- align:right;} > #ygrp-actbar .left{ > float:left;white-space:nowrap;} > .bld{font-weight:bold;} > #ygrp-grft{ > font-family:Verdana;font-size:77%;padding:15px 0;} > #ygrp-ft{ > font-family:verdana;font-size:77%;border-top:1px solid #666; > padding:5px 0; > } > #ygrp-mlmsg #logo{ > padding-bottom:10px;} > > #ygrp-vital{ > background-color:#e0ecee;margin-bottom:20px;padding:2px 0 8px 8px;} > #ygrp-vital #vithd{ > font-size:77%;font-family:Verdana;font-weight:bold;color:#333;text- transform:uppercase;} > #ygrp-vital ul{ > padding:0;margin:2px 0;} > #ygrp-vital ul li{ > list-style-type:none;clear:both;border:1px solid #e0ecee; > } > #ygrp-vital ul li .ct{ > font-weight:bold;color:#ff7900;float:right;width:2em;text- align:right;padding-right:.5em;} > #ygrp-vital ul li .cat{ > font-weight:bold;} > #ygrp-vital a{ > text-decoration:none;} > > #ygrp-vital a:hover{ > text-decoration:underline;} > > #ygrp-sponsor #hd{ > color:#999;font-size:77%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ov{ > padding:6px 13px;background-color:#e0ecee;margin-bottom:20px;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ov ul{ > padding:0 0 0 8px;margin:0;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ov li{ > list-style-type:square;padding:6px 0;font-size:77%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ov li a{ > text-decoration:none;font-size:130%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #nc{ > background-color:#eee;margin-bottom:20px;padding:0 8px;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad{ > padding:8px 0;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad #hd1{ > font-family:Arial;font-weight:bold;color:#628c2a;font- size:100%;line-height:122%;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad a{ > text-decoration:none;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad a:hover{ > text-decoration:underline;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad p{ > margin:0;} > o{font-size:0;} > .MsoNormal{ > margin:0 0 0 0;} > #ygrp-text tt{ > font-size:120%;} > blockquote{margin:0 0 0 4px;} > .replbq{margin:4;} > --> > > > > > > > > > ______________________________________________________________________ ______________ > Never miss a thing. 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Guest guest Posted January 10, 2008 Report Share Posted January 10, 2008 Jim I am sorry your struggling today and feeling down but dont beat yourself up on it, your entitiled to be down and have not so good days. Let yourself grieve and have a low day then work on getting yourself picked back up for the next day! I am glad for you that the cancer is still in remission, that may not be important to you but I am sure deep down it is because its one less thing you have to NOT worry about! Which when dealing with this already that means a whole lot! Hang in there! You sun will come out tomorrow! Sandie suffering succotash, WI 2007 37 > > > > > > > > It could be they do not want to face losing you. I know that my > family finds it hard to realize that i am dying. That option was > always there but no one wants a specific time frame. I know I have > trouble myself accepting IPF. I find no fault at them wanting me > forever but forever is sometimes shorter than we think. Love you all. > > > > > > > > > > > > grief > > > > > > > & ! gt; > > > > Judy B, > > > > My heart aches over the situation with your daughter. My > > > > daughter is 23 and isn't dealing well with my illness either. > > > > I can't expect her to be okay with the fact that her father > > > > committed suicide when she was 8, and her 56-year-old > > > > mother has a terminal illness. She will talk about it only > > > > in brief spurts. She and my son are definitely already > > > > grieving, even though on the surface Kate seems to be > > > > doing fine. The timing of all this is terrible, as she only > > > > turned her life around 3 years ago after being self- > > > > destructive and troubled. We were kind of making up > > > > for lost time, and then WHAM - this diagnosis. Unlike > > > > me, Kate's still not great at openly and honestly > > > > expressing her emotions. Both she and my son live > > > > 3 hours away, and I think they do feel guilt about not > > > > being physically closer to provide more support. > > > > Fortunate! ly, my s on will talk about any and everything > > > > with me, not that it's easy or pleasant. He's SO sweet > > > > and supportive. He's 28, and my daughter-in- law is > > > > very special and dear to my heart too. > > > > > > > > If you two have always been close, I believe that things > > > > will work themselves out somehow. You will find a way > > > > to lovingly say to her what you need to say, in a way that > > > > gives you peace and helps ease her mind and her pain later. > > > > You will ease the way for her to say what she needs to > > > > say, by being an approachable mother. Parenting's an > > > > incredibly hard job, even when you're baby's 44. > > > > > > > > None of us knows exactly how long we'll be here, but > > > > this disease gives us reason to begin grieving early. It > > > > also teaches us to cherish the sanctity of life, and to > > > > give to God what we cannot do for ourselves. You're in > > > > my prayers. > > > > > > > > Hugs and blessings, > > > > Gwynne IPF 7/04 listed for transplant 3/07 Texas > > > > > > > > > > > ! > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? Find them fast with Yahoo! > Search. > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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