Re: Latest on Kerry

[Guest guest]

Kerry I am so sorry to hear about your Mom . How sad

to lose her so unexpectedly. I will say a prayer for

her.I hate to hear how you have been sliding and I

know you will kick ass when you get into the

transplant mode. Good Luck stay in touch . I will pray

for you.

IPF 2/07 IL

--- Kerry wrote:

> It's hard to know where to begin regarding an update

> about me.

> Hmmm. Well, just over a year ago I was playing ice

> hockey and

> threatening the lives of respiratory therapists when

> they wanted to

> give me O2 to keep up my sats at rehab. Rehab that

> I enrolled

> myself in just to make sure I had done absolutely

> everything I could

> to make myself the healthiest me I could be. I did

> get a pulseox in

> order to try to be more realistic in my activities

> and not be doing

> damage to the rest of my body by pushing myself too

> hard. I joined

> this group just before that to do more online

> research (maybe find

> feedback from actual people living w/ the disease I

> read on my

> charts, find out something that actually applied to

> me). February,

> I flew out to Cali to visit family and though I had

> given up hockey

> because my O2 was dropping too low, I was still

> working out at the Y

> with 5 group classes a week and running around after

> my kids and

> still doing it all. Severe and completely

> debilitating coughing

> attacks were my big, big complaint. I was trying to

> knock out all

> additional possible coughing culprits and making

> sure I was doing

> all I could in spite of the IPF. The coughing

> attacks kept on and

> the sob increased and the recovery time when my sats

> dropped

> increased. I tried nebulizers, flutter valves,

> postural therapy to

> try to focus on addressing the Bronchiectasis. None

> of that has

> really helped. I got all the bloodwork repeated to

> rule out any

> additional diseases, got back on allergy meds, got

> an upper GI and

> w/a small hiatal hernia and slight GERD I started

> taking Prevacid.

> I went for a 2nd opinion. No improvements and

> nothing new learned

> and all along I've been in a downhill slide w/ my

> diffusion. I

> finally gave in to getting O2 in August and finally

> actuall gave in

> and started using it almost full time in October. I

> was only taking

> it off to do my group classes at the Y. That went

> on until the

> weekend after Thanksgiving (right after my last post

> about Judy's

> lung collapse). That weekend my mother passed away.

> Sudden and

> shockingly and without any real explanation (after

> the fact we'll

> assume heartattack or arterial sclerosis). I was

> away from the Y

> and exercise for 2 months. I am finally back to

> exercise but I

> can't do anything w/out the O2. In fact, I'm

> getting back to

> borderline anxiety attacks because of the O2

> dropping. It drops w/

> every move. My diffusion is 20% and so pump in all

> the O2 you want,

> it ain't getting thru and when it drops it's very

> scary. I would

> never even discuss transplant, that was not an

> option as far as I

> was concerned. Now, that's my option. I am doing

> the battle w/

> disability and still waiting on the final word

> there. I have been

> referred for transplant, met w/ the transplant pulmo

> and am set up

> for eval. next month. I have become much less

> mobile and much more

> reliant on others. My husband has totally changed

> his work schedule

> to take my daughter to school each morning and I

> almost had a

> breakdown the other day in anticipation of him

> leaving town for one

> overnight trip. It's just so amazing what a

> difference a year

> makes. This is sounding like a sad email which is

> the wrong note to

> end on. I am totally bummed about the difference of

> the year and

> the decline and it's effects. I am however going

> into the

> transplant w/ nothing but positive thoughts. I am a

> very strong 37

> year old w/ no other health factors and a huge

> support system and as

> I told the transplant pulmo I plan to be the poster

> child success

> story and kick ass at the transplant games! So

> there. Off to go

> carry my sleeping 3 year old to the car, have a

> panic attack about

> not breathing, pick up my 6 year old and then check

> on Joyce.

>

> Off I go,

> Kerry

> IPF '01

> S. IN

>

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

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[Guest guest]

There isnt anything I can say accept you have the right attitude and

I know everyone is praying for you and I am glad your going to the

transplant team to see what you can do for yourself and for that

sweet 3 year old and 6 year old!

Hang in there!

Sandie

>

> It's hard to know where to begin regarding an update about me.

> Hmmm. Well, just over a year ago I was playing ice hockey and

> threatening the lives of respiratory therapists when they wanted to

> give me O2 to keep up my sats at rehab. Rehab that I enrolled

> myself in just to make sure I had done absolutely everything I

could

> to make myself the healthiest me I could be. I did get a pulseox

in

> order to try to be more realistic in my activities and not be doing

> damage to the rest of my body by pushing myself too hard. I joined

> this group just before that to do more online research (maybe find

> feedback from actual people living w/ the disease I read on my

> charts, find out something that actually applied to me). February,

> I flew out to Cali to visit family and though I had given up hockey

> because my O2 was dropping too low, I was still working out at the

Y

> with 5 group classes a week and running around after my kids and

> still doing it all. Severe and completely debilitating coughing

> attacks were my big, big complaint. I was trying to knock out all

> additional possible coughing culprits and making sure I was doing

> all I could in spite of the IPF. The coughing attacks kept on and

> the sob increased and the recovery time when my sats dropped

> increased. I tried nebulizers, flutter valves, postural therapy to

> try to focus on addressing the Bronchiectasis. None of that has

> really helped. I got all the bloodwork repeated to rule out any

> additional diseases, got back on allergy meds, got an upper GI and

> w/a small hiatal hernia and slight GERD I started taking Prevacid.

> I went for a 2nd opinion. No improvements and nothing new learned

> and all along I've been in a downhill slide w/ my diffusion. I

> finally gave in to getting O2 in August and finally actuall gave in

> and started using it almost full time in October. I was only

taking

> it off to do my group classes at the Y. That went on until the

> weekend after Thanksgiving (right after my last post about Judy's

> lung collapse). That weekend my mother passed away. Sudden and

> shockingly and without any real explanation (after the fact we'll

> assume heartattack or arterial sclerosis). I was away from the Y

> and exercise for 2 months. I am finally back to exercise but I

> can't do anything w/out the O2. In fact, I'm getting back to

> borderline anxiety attacks because of the O2 dropping. It drops w/

> every move. My diffusion is 20% and so pump in all the O2 you

want,

> it ain't getting thru and when it drops it's very scary. I would

> never even discuss transplant, that was not an option as far as I

> was concerned. Now, that's my option. I am doing the battle w/

> disability and still waiting on the final word there. I have been

> referred for transplant, met w/ the transplant pulmo and am set up

> for eval. next month. I have become much less mobile and much more

> reliant on others. My husband has totally changed his work

schedule

> to take my daughter to school each morning and I almost had a

> breakdown the other day in anticipation of him leaving town for one

> overnight trip. It's just so amazing what a difference a year

> makes. This is sounding like a sad email which is the wrong note

to

> end on. I am totally bummed about the difference of the year and

> the decline and it's effects. I am however going into the

> transplant w/ nothing but positive thoughts. I am a very strong 37

> year old w/ no other health factors and a huge support system and

as

> I told the transplant pulmo I plan to be the poster child success

> story and kick ass at the transplant games! So there. Off to go

> carry my sleeping 3 year old to the car, have a panic attack about

> not breathing, pick up my 6 year old and then check on Joyce.

>

> Off I go,

> Kerry

> IPF '01

> S. IN

>

[Guest guest]

Kerry, I am so sorry about your Mom. You are an amazing young woman and I love your spirit. You go girl.Thank you so much for the info on Joyce. I am very jealous you live so close. She is such a special lady.Keep us posted about you and take care of you. Love and Prayers, Peggyipf 6/04Worry looks around.Sorry looks back,Faith looks up. It's hard to know where to begin regarding an update about me. Hmmm. Well, just over a year ago I was playing ice hockey and threatening the lives of respiratory therapists when they wanted to give me O2 to keep up my sats at rehab. Rehab that I enrolled myself in just to make sure I had done absolutely everything I could to make myself the healthiest me I could be. I did get a pulseox in order to try to be more realistic in my activities and not be doing damage to the rest of my body by pushing myself too hard. I joined this group just before that to do more online research (maybe find feedback from actual people living w/ the disease I read on my charts, find out something that actually applied to me). February, I flew out to Cali to visit family and though I had given up hockey because my O2 was dropping too low, I was still working out at the Y with 5 group classes a week and running around after my kids and still doing it all. Severe and completely debilitating coughing attacks were my big, big complaint. I was trying to knock out all additional possible coughing culprits and making sure I was doing all I could in spite of the IPF. The coughing attacks kept on and the sob increased and the recovery time when my sats dropped increased. I tried nebulizers, flutter valves, postural therapy to try to focus on addressing the Bronchiectasis. None of that has really helped. I got all the bloodwork repeated to rule out any additional diseases, got back on allergy meds, got an upper GI and w/a small hiatal hernia and slight GERD I started taking Prevacid. I went for a 2nd opinion. No improvements and nothing new learned and all along I've been in a downhill slide w/ my diffusion. I finally gave in to getting O2 in August and finally actuall gave in and started using it almost full time in October. I was only taking it off to do my group classes at the Y. That went on until the weekend after Thanksgiving (right after my last post about Judy's lung collapse). That weekend my mother passed away. Sudden and shockingly and without any real explanation (after the fact we'll assume heartattack or arterial sclerosis). I was away from the Y and exercise for 2 months. I am finally back to exercise but I can't do anything w/out the O2. In fact, I'm getting back to borderline anxiety attacks because of the O2 dropping. It drops w/ every move. My diffusion is 20% and so pump in all the O2 you want, it ain't getting thru and when it drops it's very scary. I would never even discuss transplant, that was not an option as far as I was concerned. Now, that's my option. I am doing the battle w/ disability and still waiting on the final word there. I have been referred for transplant, met w/ the transplant pulmo and am set up for eval. next month. I have become much less mobile and much more reliant on others. My husband has totally changed his work schedule to take my daughter to school each morning and I almost had a breakdown the other day in anticipation of him leaving town for one overnight trip. It's just so amazing what a difference a year makes. This is sounding like a sad email which is the wrong note to end on. I am totally bummed about the difference of the year and the decline and it's effects. I am however going into the transplant w/ nothing but positive thoughts. I am a very strong 37 year old w/ no other health factors and a huge support system and as I told the transplant pulmo I plan to be the poster child success story and kick ass at the transplant games! So there. Off to go carry my sleeping 3 year old to the car, have a panic attack about not breathing, pick up my 6 year old and then check on Joyce.Off I go,KerryIPF '01S. IN 

[Guest guest]

Hi Kerry, I am sorry to hear about your mom, also. I wish I had half the courage you have!! You seem to be such a brave lady!! I know you will make it through this. Your post says it all. You are a fighter and I believe with all my heart that is what is going to get all of us through whatever we have to deal with in the disease process. Hip, hip, hooray for the fighters!! I am working each every day to be half as strong as you. I don't have any doubts at all that you will make it through with flying colors. You are in my thoughts and prayers and if I can do anything, please let me know. I always have an "ear." Carokiki boettin wrote: Kerry I am so sorry to hear about your Mom . How sadto lose her so unexpectedly. I will say a prayer forher.I hate to hear how you have been sliding and Iknow you will kick ass when you get into thetransplant mode. Good Luck stay in touch . I will prayfor you. IPF 2/07 IL--- Kerry <kerrygeron> wrote:> It's hard to know where to begin regarding an update> about me. > Hmmm. Well, just over a year ago I was playing ice> hockey and > threatening the lives of respiratory therapists when> they wanted to > give me O2 to keep up my sats at rehab. Rehab that> I enrolled > myself

in just to make sure I had done absolutely> everything I could > to make myself the healthiest me I could be. I did> get a pulseox in > order to try to be more realistic in my activities> and not be doing > damage to the rest of my body by pushing myself too> hard. I joined > this group just before that to do more online> research (maybe find > feedback from actual people living w/ the disease I> read on my > charts, find out something that actually applied to> me). February, > I flew out to Cali to visit family and though I had> given up hockey > because my O2 was dropping too low, I was still> working out at the Y > with 5 group classes a week and running around after> my kids and > still doing it all. Severe and completely> debilitating coughing > attacks were my big, big complaint. I was trying to> knock out

all > additional possible coughing culprits and making> sure I was doing > all I could in spite of the IPF. The coughing> attacks kept on and > the sob increased and the recovery time when my sats> dropped > increased. I tried nebulizers, flutter valves,> postural therapy to > try to focus on addressing the Bronchiectasis. None> of that has > really helped. I got all the bloodwork repeated to> rule out any > additional diseases, got back on allergy meds, got> an upper GI and > w/a small hiatal hernia and slight GERD I started> taking Prevacid. > I went for a 2nd opinion. No improvements and> nothing new learned > and all along I've been in a downhill slide w/ my> diffusion. I > finally gave in to getting O2 in August and finally> actuall gave in > and started using it almost full time in October. I> was only

taking > it off to do my group classes at the Y. That went> on until the > weekend after Thanksgiving (right after my last post> about Judy's > lung collapse). That weekend my mother passed away.> Sudden and > shockingly and without any real explanation (after> the fact we'll > assume heartattack or arterial sclerosis). I was> away from the Y > and exercise for 2 months. I am finally back to> exercise but I > can't do anything w/out the O2. In fact, I'm> getting back to > borderline anxiety attacks because of the O2> dropping. It drops w/ > every move. My diffusion is 20% and so pump in all> the O2 you want, > it ain't getting thru and when it drops it's very> scary. I would > never even discuss transplant, that was not an> option as far as I > was concerned. Now, that's my option. I am doing> the battle w/

> disability and still waiting on the final word> there. I have been > referred for transplant, met w/ the transplant pulmo> and am set up > for eval. next month. I have become much less> mobile and much more > reliant on others. My husband has totally changed> his work schedule > to take my daughter to school each morning and I> almost had a > breakdown the other day in anticipation of him> leaving town for one > overnight trip. It's just so amazing what a> difference a year > makes. This is sounding like a sad email which is> the wrong note to > end on. I am totally bummed about the difference of> the year and > the decline and it's effects. I am however going> into the > transplant w/ nothing but positive thoughts. I am a> very strong 37 > year old w/ no other health factors and a huge> support system and

as > I told the transplant pulmo I plan to be the poster> child success > story and kick ass at the transplant games! So> there. Off to go > carry my sleeping 3 year old to the car, have a> panic attack about > not breathing, pick up my 6 year old and then check> on Joyce.> > Off I go,> Kerry> IPF '01> S. IN > > __________________________________________________________Looking for last minute shopping deals? Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php?category=shoppingCaroAsthma 1976,Osteoarthritis 2002, COPD 02/06, IPF 08/06, UIP 01/08Mississippi

Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now.

[Guest guest]

Way to go - kicking ass! Keep it up and I'm looking forward to seeing that poster!

www.heatherkirkwood.blogspot.com

Hermansky-Pudlak Syndrome albinism/PF 06>> It's hard to know where to begin regarding an update about me. > Hmmm. Well, just over a year ago I was playing ice hockey and > threatening the lives of respiratory therapists when they wanted to > give me O2 to keep up my sats at rehab. Rehab that I enrolled > myself in just to make sure I had done absolutely everything I could > to make myself the healthiest me I could be. I did get a pulseox in > order to try to be more realistic in my activities and not be doing > damage to the rest of my body by pushing myself too hard. I joined > this group just before that to do more online research (maybe find > feedback from actual people living w/ the disease I read on my > charts, find out something that actually applied to me). February, > I flew out to Cali to visit family and though I had given up hockey > because my O2 was dropping too low, I was still working out at the Y > with 5 group classes a week and running around after my kids and > still doing it all. Severe and completely debilitating coughing > attacks were my big, big complaint. I was trying to knock out all > additional possible coughing culprits and making sure I was doing > all I could in spite of the IPF. The coughing attacks kept on and > the sob increased and the recovery time when my sats dropped > increased. I tried nebulizers, flutter valves, postural therapy to > try to focus on addressing the Bronchiectasis. None of that has > really helped. I got all the bloodwork repeated to rule out any > additional diseases, got back on allergy meds, got an upper GI and > w/a small hiatal hernia and slight GERD I started taking Prevacid. > I went for a 2nd opinion. No improvements and nothing new learned > and all along I've been in a downhill slide w/ my diffusion. I > finally gave in to getting O2 in August and finally actuall gave in > and started using it almost full time in October. I was only taking > it off to do my group classes at the Y. That went on until the > weekend after Thanksgiving (right after my last post about Judy's > lung collapse). That weekend my mother passed away. Sudden and > shockingly and without any real explanation (after the fact we'll > assume heartattack or arterial sclerosis). I was away from the Y > and exercise for 2 months. I am finally back to exercise but I > can't do anything w/out the O2. In fact, I'm getting back to > borderline anxiety attacks because of the O2 dropping. It drops w/ > every move. My diffusion is 20% and so pump in all the O2 you want, > it ain't getting thru and when it drops it's very scary. I would > never even discuss transplant, that was not an option as far as I > was concerned. Now, that's my option. I am doing the battle w/ > disability and still waiting on the final word there. I have been > referred for transplant, met w/ the transplant pulmo and am set up > for eval. next month. I have become much less mobile and much more > reliant on others. My husband has totally changed his work schedule > to take my daughter to school each morning and I almost had a > breakdown the other day in anticipation of him leaving town for one > overnight trip. It's just so amazing what a difference a year > makes. This is sounding like a sad email which is the wrong note to > end on. I am totally bummed about the difference of the year and > the decline and it's effects. I am however going into the > transplant w/ nothing but positive thoughts. I am a very strong 37 > year old w/ no other health factors and a huge support system and as > I told the transplant pulmo I plan to be the poster child success > story and kick ass at the transplant games! So there. Off to go > carry my sleeping 3 year old to the car, have a panic attack about > not breathing, pick up my 6 year old and then check on Joyce.> > Off I go,> Kerry> IPF '01> S. IN>

[Guest guest]

Kerry,

I'm so glad to hear from you!!! I think about you all the time and wonder how you are doing. Believe me I understand the feeling of total bewilderment and confusion at how utterly life changes with this flippin disease. I'm a bit older than you but at 46 when I was diagnosed I was not at all ready for life to turn on a dime the way it did.

You are positive and determined and that is going to help you more than anything else. You will remain in my thoughts and prayers.

Thank you also for updating us on Joyce. I know we all appreciate it!!!

Beth in NC age 48 Fibrotic NSIP 06/06

"For as long as I shall live, I will testify to Love."

Latest on Kerry

It's hard to know where to begin regarding an update about me. Hmmm. Well, just over a year ago I was playing ice hockey and threatening the lives of respiratory therapists when they wanted to give me O2 to keep up my sats at rehab. Rehab that I enrolled myself in just to make sure I had done absolutely everything I could to make myself the healthiest me I could be. I did get a pulseox in order to try to be more realistic in my activities and not be doing damage to the rest of my body by pushing myself too hard. I joined this group just before that to do more online research (maybe find feedback from actual people living w/ the disease I read on my charts, find out something that actually applied to me). February, I flew out to Cali to visit family and though I had given up hockey because my O2 was dropping too low, I was still working out at the Y with 5 group classes a week and running around after

my kids and still doing it all. Severe and completely debilitating coughing attacks were my big, big complaint. I was trying to knock out all additional possible coughing culprits and making sure I was doing all I could in spite of the IPF. The coughing attacks kept on and the sob increased and the recovery time when my sats dropped increased. I tried nebulizers, flutter valves, postural therapy to try to focus on addressing the Bronchiectasis. None of that has really helped. I got all the bloodwork repeated to rule out any additional diseases, got back on allergy meds, got an upper GI and w/a small hiatal hernia and slight GERD I started taking Prevacid. I went for a 2nd opinion. No improvements and nothing new learned and all along I've been in a downhill slide w/ my diffusion. I finally gave in to getting O2 in August and finally actuall gave in and started using it almost full time in October.

I was only taking it off to do my group classes at the Y. That went on until the weekend after Thanksgiving (right after my last post about Judy's lung collapse). That weekend my mother passed away. Sudden and shockingly and without any real explanation (after the fact we'll assume heartattack or arterial sclerosis). I was away from the Y and exercise for 2 months. I am finally back to exercise but I can't do anything w/out the O2. In fact, I'm getting back to borderline anxiety attacks because of the O2 dropping. It drops w/ every move. My diffusion is 20% and so pump in all the O2 you want, it ain't getting thru and when it drops it's very scary. I would never even discuss transplant, that was not an option as far as I was concerned. Now, that's my option. I am doing the battle w/ disability and still waiting on the final word there. I have been referred for transplant, met w/ the transplant

pulmo and am set up for eval. next month. I have become much less mobile and much more reliant on others. My husband has totally changed his work schedule to take my daughter to school each morning and I almost had a breakdown the other day in anticipation of him leaving town for one overnight trip. It's just so amazing what a difference a year makes. This is sounding like a sad email which is the wrong note to end on. I am totally bummed about the difference of the year and the decline and it's effects. I am however going into the transplant w/ nothing but positive thoughts. I am a very strong 37 year old w/ no other health factors and a huge support system and as I told the transplant pulmo I plan to be the poster child success story and kick ass at the transplant games! So there. Off to go carry my sleeping 3 year old to the car, have a panic attack about not breathing, pick up my 6 year old and

then check on Joyce.Off I go,KerryIPF '01S. IN

[Guest guest]

Kerry,

I know how it hurts,I lost my mom at 19, you are in my prayers.

Vicky81856 Start the year off right. Easy ways to stay in shape in the new year.

[Guest guest]

Kerry,

Thanks so much for telling us how you are doing. I have been very concerned about you since your Mom had passed suddenly. I know you are grieving for all those activities you no longer do. I think we all are in some stage of grief. I am glad you are staying in a positive frame of mind. Take care of you!

Toodles!

Jane UIP/IPF 12/1998 Dalton, Georgia aka pianolady_musicgirl>> It's hard to know where to begin regarding an update about me. > Hmmm. Well, just over a year ago I was playing ice hockey and > threatening the lives of respiratory therapists when they wanted to > give me O2 to keep up my sats at rehab. Rehab that I enrolled > myself in just to make sure I had done absolutely everything I could > to make myself the healthiest me I could be. I did get a pulseox in > order to try to be more realistic in my activities and not be doing > damage to the rest of my body by pushing myself too hard. I joined > this group just before that to do more online research (maybe find > feedback from actual people living w/ the disease I read on my > charts, find out something that actually applied to me). February, > I flew out to Cali to visit family and though I had given up hockey > because my O2 was dropping too low, I was still working out at the Y > with 5 group classes a week and running around after my kids and > still doing it all. Severe and completely debilitating coughing > attacks were my big, big complaint. I was trying to knock out all > additional possible coughing culprits and making sure I was doing > all I could in spite of the IPF. The coughing attacks kept on and > the sob increased and the recovery time when my sats dropped > increased. I tried nebulizers, flutter valves, postural therapy to > try to focus on addressing the Bronchiectasis. None of that has > really helped. I got all the bloodwork repeated to rule out any > additional diseases, got back on allergy meds, got an upper GI and > w/a small hiatal hernia and slight GERD I started taking Prevacid. > I went for a 2nd opinion. No improvements and nothing new learned > and all along I've been in a downhill slide w/ my diffusion. I > finally gave in to getting O2 in August and finally actuall gave in > and started using it almost full time in October. I was only taking > it off to do my group classes at the Y. That went on until the > weekend after Thanksgiving (right after my last post about Judy's > lung collapse). That weekend my mother passed away. Sudden and > shockingly and without any real explanation (after the fact we'll > assume heartattack or arterial sclerosis). I was away from the Y > and exercise for 2 months. I am finally back to exercise but I > can't do anything w/out the O2. In fact, I'm getting back to > borderline anxiety attacks because of the O2 dropping. It drops w/ > every move. My diffusion is 20% and so pump in all the O2 you want, > it ain't getting thru and when it drops it's very scary. I would > never even discuss transplant, that was not an option as far as I > was concerned. Now, that's my option. I am doing the battle w/ > disability and still waiting on the final word there. I have been > referred for transplant, met w/ the transplant pulmo and am set up > for eval. next month. I have become much less mobile and much more > reliant on others. My husband has totally changed his work schedule > to take my daughter to school each morning and I almost had a > breakdown the other day in anticipation of him leaving town for one > overnight trip. It's just so amazing what a difference a year > makes. This is sounding like a sad email which is the wrong note to > end on. I am totally bummed about the difference of the year and > the decline and it's effects. I am however going into the > transplant w/ nothing but positive thoughts. I am a very strong 37 > year old w/ no other health factors and a huge support system and as > I told the transplant pulmo I plan to be the poster child success > story and kick ass at the transplant games! So there. Off to go > carry my sleeping 3 year old to the car, have a panic attack about > not breathing, pick up my 6 year old and then check on Joyce.> > Off I go,> Kerry> IPF '01> S. IN>

[Guest guest]

Thank you to all who have sent condolences regarding my Mom. When

it happened I did notify a very few, but requested it not be posted

because it just felt too personal to post and at the time I just

couldn't handle it. It still is sooo, sooo very shocking. Hard to

believe she's gone. We had a lifetime of baggage, but had recently

made huge headways in our communication and well a lot. I really

haven't even begun to deal w/ it. It had it's immediate impact and

finally the tears have subsided on the surface as I go about my

day. It was a lot to work out the travel w/ O2 and the stress of

balancing not hurting myself physically and still being there and

doing what I needed to do. Then it was another thing to appear

before a huge group of people as the poor sick girl attached by a

leash to a machine. At least I gave everyone a distraction and

something else to focus on. I was able to help my Dad and my kids

were able to bring smiles to everyone (they're a heck of a

distraction too, and a much better one than I). We went thru

500,000 pictures (I made 10 poster boards of pics, put together a 15

pic online tribute and a 100 pic video tribute). It was healing,

yet there is no healing. I've done about 250 thank you cards on

behalf of the family (another thing I could do to help out since I

don't live near and well I could sit and do them). I just realized

I'm sitting here crying and just babbling so I'm gonna stop. It was

a very difficult time and it will be forever, absolutely forever. I

am trying though to put it in perspective as all part of this

journey I'm on and trying to learn from it all. One of the hardest

things and something that will come up again and again to make me

want to scream is that the plan was for my parents to take care of

me post transplant and that was really my Mom's time to shine... she

was the best when we were sick so I was really looking forward to

that. My illness was actually one of the things that was probably

helping put things in perspective and the last time she was in town

I told her how scared I was and just hugged her and cried before

they left for the airport (that was in October). I talked to her

the Wednesday before she died and thanked her for some art she'd

just done for me and told her how much I loved it. I said I love

you and that was the last time we spoke. Oh, babbling and crying

harder... gotta go. Anyway, thanks to all and obviously, I'm not

all tough and strong and peppy about all things, but I'm dealing w/

the " journey " and trying to be open and take in all the " lessons " I

can, that's my latest approach.

All for now,

Kerry

IPF '01

S. IN

[Guest guest]

Kerry,My heart goes out to you. I am so deeply sorry for your loss. You are such a strong lady. I miss your posts and I was so happy to check my email today and see posts from you. You always give yourself to everyone else first and think of yourself last. I am glad that you and your mom were on amends and that you will always remember you said "I Love You" to her. My thoughts are with you....I miss your posts and you.Cyndi (DAD PF12.05)Kerry wrote: Thank you to all who have sent condolences

regarding my Mom. When it happened I did notify a very few, but requested it not be posted because it just felt too personal to post and at the time I just couldn't handle it. It still is sooo, sooo very shocking. Hard to believe she's gone. We had a lifetime of baggage, but had recently made huge headways in our communication and well a lot. I really haven't even begun to deal w/ it. It had it's immediate impact and finally the tears have subsided on the surface as I go about my day. It was a lot to work out the travel w/ O2 and the stress of balancing not hurting myself physically and still being there and doing what I needed to do. Then it was another thing to appear before a huge group of people as the poor sick girl attached by a leash to a machine. At least I gave everyone a distraction and something else to focus on. I was able to help my Dad and my kids were able to bring smiles to

everyone (they're a heck of a distraction too, and a much better one than I). We went thru 500,000 pictures (I made 10 poster boards of pics, put together a 15 pic online tribute and a 100 pic video tribute). It was healing, yet there is no healing. I've done about 250 thank you cards on behalf of the family (another thing I could do to help out since I don't live near and well I could sit and do them). I just realized I'm sitting here crying and just babbling so I'm gonna stop. It was a very difficult time and it will be forever, absolutely forever. I am trying though to put it in perspective as all part of this journey I'm on and trying to learn from it all. One of the hardest things and something that will come up again and again to make me want to scream is that the plan was for my parents to take care of me post transplant and that was really my Mom's time to shine... she was the best when we

were sick so I was really looking forward to that. My illness was actually one of the things that was probably helping put things in perspective and the last time she was in town I told her how scared I was and just hugged her and cried before they left for the airport (that was in October). I talked to her the Wednesday before she died and thanked her for some art she'd just done for me and told her how much I loved it. I said I love you and that was the last time we spoke. Oh, babbling and crying harder... gotta go. Anyway, thanks to all and obviously, I'm not all tough and strong and peppy about all things, but I'm dealing w/ the "journey" and trying to be open and take in all the "lessons" I can, that's my latest approach. All for now, Kerry IPF '01 S. IN

[Guest guest]

Kerry, I am sending a huge warm hug to you. You are a special girl. Love and Prayers, Peggyipf 6/04Worry looks around.Sorry looks back,Faith looks up. Thank you to all who have sent condolences regarding my Mom. When it happened I did notify a very few, but requested it not be posted because it just felt too personal to post and at the time I just couldn't handle it. It still is sooo, sooo very shocking. Hard to believe she's gone. We had a lifetime of baggage, but had recently made huge headways in our communication and well a lot. I really haven't even begun to deal w/ it. It had it's immediate impact and finally the tears have subsided on the surface as I go about my day. It was a lot to work out the travel w/ O2 and the stress of balancing not hurting myself physically and still being there and doing what I needed to do. Then it was another thing to appear before a huge group of people as the poor sick girl attached by a leash to a machine. At least I gave everyone a distraction and something else to focus on. I was able to help my Dad and my kids were able to bring smiles to everyone (they're a heck of a distraction too, and a much better one than I). We went thru 500,000 pictures (I made 10 poster boards of pics, put together a 15 pic online tribute and a 100 pic video tribute). It was healing, yet there is no healing. I've done about 250 thank you cards on behalf of the family (another thing I could do to help out since I don't live near and well I could sit and do them). I just realized I'm sitting here crying and just babbling so I'm gonna stop. It was a very difficult time and it will be forever, absolutely forever. I am trying though to put it in perspective as all part of this journey I'm on and trying to learn from it all. One of the hardest things and something that will come up again and again to make me want to scream is that the plan was for my parents to take care of me post transplant and that was really my Mom's time to shine... she was the best when we were sick so I was really looking forward to that. My illness was actually one of the things that was probably helping put things in perspective and the last time she was in town I told her how scared I was and just hugged her and cried before they left for the airport (that was in October). I talked to her the Wednesday before she died and thanked her for some art she'd just done for me and told her how much I loved it. I said I love you and that was the last time we spoke. Oh, babbling and crying harder... gotta go. Anyway, thanks to all and obviously, I'm not all tough and strong and peppy about all things, but I'm dealing w/ the "journey" and trying to be open and take in all the "lessons" I can, that's my latest approach.All for now,KerryIPF '01S. IN 

[Guest guest]

Hi , How are you? I always smile when I see a post from you. How is Dad doing? Say Hello for me. Love and Prayers, Peggyipf 6/04Worry looks around.Sorry looks back,Faith looks up. Kerry,My heart goes out to you.  I am so deeply sorry for your loss.  You are such a strong lady.  I miss your posts and I was so happy to check my email today and see posts from you.  You always give yourself to everyone else first and think of yourself last. I am glad that you and your mom were on amends and that you will always remember you said "I Love You" to her.  My thoughts are with you....I miss your posts and you.Cyndi (DAD PF12.05)Kerry <kerrygeron> wrote:Thank you to all who have sent condolences regarding my Mom. When it happened I did notify a very few, but requested it not be posted because it just felt too personal to post and at the time I just couldn't handle it. It still is sooo, sooo very shocking. Hard to believe she's gone. We had a lifetime of baggage, but had recently made huge headways in our communication and well a lot. I really haven't even begun to deal w/ it. It had it's immediate impact and finally the tears have subsided on the surface as I go about my day. It was a lot to work out the travel w/ O2 and the stress of balancing not hurting myself physically and still being there and doing what I needed to do. Then it was another thing to appear before a huge group of people as the poor sick girl attached by a leash to a machine. At least I gave everyone a distraction and something else to focus on. I was able to help my Dad and my kids were able to bring smiles to everyone (they're a heck of a distraction too, and a much better one than I). We went thru 500,000 pictures (I made 10 poster boards of pics, put together a 15 pic online tribute and a 100 pic video tribute). It was healing, yet there is no healing. I've done about 250 thank you cards on behalf of the family (another thing I could do to help out since I don't live near and well I could sit and do them). I just realized I'm sitting here crying and just babbling so I'm gonna stop. It was a very difficult time and it will be forever, absolutely forever. I am trying though to put it in perspective as all part of this journey I'm on and trying to learn from it all. One of the hardest things and something that will come up again and again to make me want to scream is that the plan was for my parents to take care of me post transplant and that was really my Mom's time to shine... she was the best when we were sick so I was really looking forward to that. My illness was actually one of the things that was probably helping put things in perspective and the last time she was in town I told her how scared I was and just hugged her and cried before they left for the airport (that was in October). I talked to her the Wednesday before she died and thanked her for some art she'd just done for me and told her how much I loved it. I said I love you and that was the last time we spoke. Oh, babbling and crying harder... gotta go. Anyway, thanks to all and obviously, I'm not all tough and strong and peppy about all things, but I'm dealing w/ the "journey" and trying to be open and take in all the "lessons" I can, that's my latest approach.All for now,KerryIPF '01S. IN 

[Guest guest]

Hi Vicky, I was just going to go to bed and saw your post pop up. It is so good to see pink again.What have you been doing with yourself? How is ? I think of y'all and wonder how your daughter and hubby are.I'm headed to bed but I'll check tomorrow and see if you have replied. Love and Prayers, Peggyipf 6/04Worry looks around.Sorry looks back,Faith looks up. Kerry, I know how it hurts,I lost my mom at 19, you are in my prayers. Vicky81856 Start the year off right. Easy ways to stay in shape in the new year.

[Guest guest]

Kerry:Im so sorry to hear about your motherI know the pain you are feeling and I wish I could say that it will get betterbut it doesn't , it never really goes away I lost my mother three years ago she died two days after her 59th birthdaybut it wasn't sudden, she died of this stupid f--ken disease (pardon my french)the last 5-yrs. of her life were just horrible to watch I just keep telling myself that, where she is at she is no longer sufferingshe is in a much better place and I believe she is looking over me stillevery where I go and every step I take .again Im so sorry about your mom, but just remember she is still with you.BRETT familial IPF/UIP 11/07 MI.Thank you to all who have sent condolences regarding my Mom. When it happened I did notify a very few, but requested it not be posted because it just felt too personal to post and at the time I just couldn't handle it. It still is sooo, sooo very shocking. Hard to believe she's gone. We had a lifetime of baggage, but had recently made huge headways in our communication and well a lot. I really haven't even begun to deal w/ it. It had it's immediate impact and finally the tears have subsided on the surface as I go about my day. It was a lot to work out the travel w/ O2 and the stress of balancing not hurting myself physically and still being there and doing what I needed to do. Then it was another thing to appear before a huge group of people as the poor sick girl attached by a leash to a machine. At least I gave everyone a distraction and something else to focus on. I was able to help my Dad and my kids were able to bring smiles to everyone (they're a heck of a distraction too, and a much better one than I). We went thru 500,000 pictures (I made 10 poster boards of pics, put together a 15 pic online tribute and a 100 pic video tribute). It was healing, yet there is no healing. I've done about 250 thank you cards on behalf of the family (another thing I could do to help out since I don't live near and well I could sit and do them). I just realized I'm sitting here crying and just babbling so I'm gonna stop. It was a very difficult time and it will be forever, absolutely forever. I am trying though to put it in perspective as all part of this journey I'm on and trying to learn from it all. One of the hardest things and something that will come up again and again to make me want to scream is that the plan was for my parents to take care of me post transplant and that was really my Mom's time to shine... she was the best when we were sick so I was really looking forward to that. My illness was actually one of the things that was probably helping put things in perspective and the last time she was in town I told her how scared I was and just hugged her and cried before they left for the airport (that was in October). I talked to her the Wednesday before she died and thanked her for some art she'd just done for me and told her how much I loved it. I said I love you and that was the last time we spoke. Oh, babbling and crying harder... gotta go. Anyway, thanks to all and obviously, I'm not all tough and strong and peppy about all things, but I'm dealing w/ the "journey" and trying to be open and take in all the "lessons" I can, that's my latest approach.All for now,KerryIPF '01S. IN brett bowserbrett@...

[Guest guest]

Kerry,

I wish I had the right words to help you deal with this. Just reading your post made me cry again. I doubt if I will ever stop hurting so much for my Mom. When I get really SOB and scared , I always wish for my Mom. Everyone tells me it will get better but I am still waiting for the better to happen. Just know I am hurting with you.

L

Re: Latest on Kerry

Thank you to all who have sent condolences regarding my Mom. When it happened I did notify a very few, but requested it not be posted because it just felt too personal to post and at the time I just couldn't handle it. It still is sooo, sooo very shocking. Hard to believe she's gone. We had a lifetime of baggage, but had recently made huge headways in our communication and well a lot. I really haven't even begun to deal w/ it. It had it's immediate impact and finally the tears have subsided on the surface as I go about my day. It was a lot to work out the travel w/ O2 and the stress of balancing not hurting myself physically and still being there and doing what I needed to do. Then it was another thing to appear before a huge group of people as the poor sick girl attached by a leash to a machine. At least I gave everyone a distraction and something else to focus on. I was able to help my Dad and my kids were able to bring smiles to everyone (they're a heck of a distraction too, and a much better one than I). We went thru 500,000 pictures (I made 10 poster boards of pics, put together a 15 pic online tribute and a 100 pic video tribute). It was healing, yet there is no healing. I've done about 250 thank you cards on behalf of the family (another thing I could do to help out since I don't live near and well I could sit and do them). I just realized I'm sitting here crying and just babbling so I'm gonna stop. It was a very difficult time and it will be forever, absolutely forever. I am trying though to put it in perspective as all part of this journey I'm on and trying to learn from it all. One of the hardest things and something that will come up again and again to make me want to scream is that the plan was for my parents to take care of me post transplant and that was really my Mom's time to shine... she was the best when we were sick so I was really looking forward to that. My illness was actually one of the things that was probably helping put things in perspective and the last time she was in town I told her how scared I was and just hugged her and cried before they left for the airport (that was in October). I talked to her the Wednesday before she died and thanked her for some art she'd just done for me and told her how much I loved it. I said I love you and that was the last time we spoke. Oh, babbling and crying harder... gotta go. Anyway, thanks to all and obviously, I'm not all tough and strong and peppy about all things, but I'm dealing w/ the "journey" and trying to be open and take in all the "lessons" I can, that's my latest approach.All for now,KerryIPF '01S. IN

[Guest guest]

Kerry, I'm so sorry for your loss!!!

The fact that you had positive time with her will

be a comfort to you in the future.

Stay strong and remember that we all are here

for you.

-- Z.fibriotic NSIP/05/ "mild" PH 10/07 PA Reynaud's too!!! Potter, reader,carousel lover, and MomMom to Darah "I'm gonna be iron like a lion in Zion." Bob Marley

--------- Re: Latest on Kerry

Thank you to all who have sent condolences regarding my Mom. When it happened I did notify a very few, but requested it not be posted because it just felt too personal to post and at the time I just couldn't handle it. It still is sooo, sooo very shocking. Hard to believe she's gone. We had a lifetime of baggage, but had recently made huge headways in our communication and well a lot. I really haven't even begun to deal w/ it. It had it's immediate impact and finally the tears have subsided on the surface as I go about my day. It was a lot to work out the travel w/ O2 and the stress of balancing not hurting myself physically and still being there and doing what I needed to do. Then it was another thing to appear before a huge group of people as the poor sick girl attached by a leash to a machine. At least I gave everyone a distraction and something else to focus on. I was able to help my Dad and my kids were able to bring s

miles to everyone (they're a heck of a distraction too, and a much better one than I). We went thru 500,000 pictures (I made 10 poster boards of pics, put together a 15 pic online tribute and a 100 pic video tribute). It was healing, yet there is no healing. I've done about 250 thank you cards on behalf of the family (another thing I could do to help out since I don't live near and well I could sit and do them). I just realized I'm sitting here crying and just babbling so I'm gonna stop. It was a very difficult time and it will be forever, absolutely forever. I am trying though to put it in perspective as all part of this journey I'm on and trying to learn from it all. One of the hardest things and something that will come up again and again to make me want to scream is that the plan was for my parents to take care of me post transplant and that was really my Mom's time to shine... she was the best when we were sick so I was r

eally looking forward to that. My illness was actually one of the things that was probably helping put things in perspective and the last time she was in town I told her how scared I was and just hugged her and cried before they left for the airport (that was in October). I talked to her the Wednesday before she died and thanked her for some art she'd just done for me and told her how much I loved it. I said I love you and that was the last time we spoke. Oh, babbling and crying harder... gotta go. Anyway, thanks to all and obviously, I'm not all tough and strong and peppy about all things, but I'm dealing w/ the "journey" and trying to be open and take in all the "lessons" I can, that's my latest approach.All for now,KerryIPF '01S. IN

[Guest guest]

That smile comes to my face when I think of you too! My dad is doing good. Great attitude, but I think his breathing is getting worse. Thanks for keeping us posted on Joyce. I'm going to get my card in the mail right now! Take care of yourself Peggy!Cyndi Peggy wrote: Hi , How are you? I always smile when I see a post from you. How is Dad doing? Say Hello for me. Love and Prayers, Peggyipf 6/04Worry looks around.Sorry looks back,Faith looks up. Kerry,My heart goes out to you. I am so deeply sorry for your loss. You are such a strong lady. I miss your posts and I was so happy to check my email today and see posts from you. You always give yourself to everyone else first and think of yourself last. I am glad that you and your mom were on amends and that you will always remember you said "I Love You" to her. My thoughts are with you....I miss your posts and you.Cyndi (DAD PF12.05)Kerry <kerrygeron> wrote:Thank you to all who have sent condolences regarding my Mom. When it happened I did notify a very few, but requested it not be posted because it just felt too personal to post and at the time I just couldn't handle it. It still is sooo, sooo very shocking. Hard to believe she's gone. We had a lifetime of baggage, but had recently made huge headways in our communication and well a lot. I really haven't even begun to deal w/ it. It had it's immediate impact and finally the tears have subsided on the surface as I go about my day. It was a lot to work out the travel w/ O2 and the stress of balancing not hurting myself physically and still being there and doing what I needed to do. Then it was another thing to appear before a huge group of people as the poor sick girl attached by a leash to a machine. At least I gave everyone a distraction and something else to focus on. I was able to help my Dad and my kids were able to bring smiles to everyone (they're a heck of a distraction too, and a much better one than I). We went thru 500,000

pictures (I made 10 poster boards of pics, put together a 15 pic online tribute and a 100 pic video tribute). It was healing, yet there is no healing. I've done about 250 thank you cards on behalf of the family (another thing I could do to help out since I don't live near and well I could sit and do them). I just realized I'm sitting here crying and just babbling so I'm gonna stop. It was a very difficult time and it will be forever, absolutely forever. I am trying though to put it in perspective as all part of this journey I'm on and trying to learn from it all.

One of the hardest things and something that will come up again and again to make me want to scream is that the plan was for my parents to take care of me post transplant and that was really my Mom's time to shine... she was the best when we were sick so I was really looking forward to that. My illness was actually one of the things that was probably helping put things in perspective and the last time she was in town I told her how scared I was and just hugged her and cried before they left for the airport (that was in October). I talked to her the Wednesday before she died and thanked her for some art she'd just done for me and told her how much I loved it. I said I love you and that was the last time we spoke. Oh, babbling and crying harder... gotta go. Anyway, thanks to all and obviously, I'm not all tough and strong and peppy about all things, but I'm dealing w/ the "journey" and trying to be open and take in all the "lessons" I can, that's my latest approach.All for now,KerryIPF '01S. IN