Choices....second guessing

[Guest guest]

I go shopping in a store and make a purchase and then get home and

later wonder if i made the right choice, especially if the purchase

disappoints me.

Yet, we are all forced to make major choices impacting our lives

forever. VATS, Prednisone, Transplants, Choice of Doctors, Choice of

Communication with Family. The list is long.

We try to do our best to make the wisest choices for ourselves but

many are so unpredictable. We all respond to VATS differently. Some

get definitive answers and some don't. Same thing with Prednisone. We

decide to try it and if it works then we're happy, but if it doesn't

and we suffer from side effects, how do we remind ourselves we did

what we thought was best and the choice wasn't wrong, just the

results. Or if we choose not to try Prednisone, when we get further

along, how do we not ask ourselves " what if. "

Me, I intend to deal with it with my very trusted counselor to

confide in when I have those self doubts and even anger at myself.

But I can't imagine one of us who doesn't have those moments of

wondering. I do and yet I feel very certain I've made the right

choices for me. But in ER on 12/31 I wasn't so sure about the VATS. I

know there will be the time I'll wonder would prednisone have helped.

What about chasing trials around the country and sacrificing whatever

necessary to participate? Well, if one is successful in finding a

meaningful treatment i'll be thrilled but I'll wonder why I didn't

find a way to be in it.