RE: : Don M. --Update

[Guest guest]

> I think my brother is unfortunately in denial, I have tried to

> push him along as much as possible but must admit I decided not

> to sugest too many of the bad possibilities until after his

> biopsy. He is in a very rural part of Northumerland (Northern

> England) and his GP, despite being in his early thirties does

> not seem to be very concerned either. They have ruled out BPH

> and before the biopsy I suggested a free PSA test which the GP

> had not even heard of (and would not authorise). I also

> suggested a month of Cipro to rule out prostatitis, but the GP

> doen't deem it appropriate as my brother had no discomfort! I'm

> sure prostatitis is often symtom free?

As I understand it, " prostatitis " is a term that just means

" inflammation of the prostate " . It is often asymptomatic. A

course of antibiotics doesn't rule it out because a lot of

prostatitis, some think the majority of cases, are not caused by

bacterial infection or, perhaps in some cases, there is a

bacterial infection but the antibiotic doesn't affect it.

As for your brother's denial, I understand that and did it

myself. My GP never specified a PSA test but I went to the lab

and a woman at the lab (perhaps her father had prostate cancer?)

added a check mark to the PSA test box on the list of lab tests

that the clinic did. I saw her do it and asked why she did and

she just said, " You ought to have a PSA test. "

It came back high and I was referred to a urologist. I thought

that was unnecessary. The urologist said I needed a biopsy. I

thought that was ridiculous. The urologist himself said there

was only a 15% chance that I had cancer. And I was obviously

very healthy. If I had cancer, I'd know it, wouldn't I? But

both doctors insisted and I decided that I better yield to their

superior knowledge.

> Thankfully he is now under the care of one of Newcastle's

> (city) hospitals and it is the second largest cancer 'centre of

> excellence' within the UK NHS system. I will pass on your info

> as I myself have found that even when dealing with the most

> erudite specialist in the private sector (here in Spain) it is

> well worth having ideas of your own and reminding them of

> possibilities.

Does that mean that he is now having his high PSA investigated?

Or is he still, as you say, in denial?

I am the kind of person who shies away from giving others

forceful personal advice. After all, who am I to intrude on

another's life and tell them what to do? So I tend to say things

like, " If I were in your situation I think I might ... " or " You

might consider ... " or " Perhaps you can ask your doctor if ... "

But I'm not sure that's always the best course.

Alan

[Guest guest]

Hi Alan,

Thank you for your reply. I think my approach is similar to yours - ie offering gentle advice. I can be blunt if I feel it's required but i know it would be a useless approach with my brother! Thankfully his elevated PSA is being investigated - Hence his appointment for the MRI on 27th Sept. I have passed on the links Chuck posted but will do no more until my brother is ready after his MRI.

Thank you for your concern and advice.

Best regards,

Chris

Re: : Don M. --Update

> I think my brother is unfortunately in denial, I have tried to> push him along as much as possible but must admit I decided not> to sugest too many of the bad possibilities until after his> biopsy. He is in a very rural part of Northumerland (Northern> England) and his GP, despite being in his early thirties does> not seem to be very concerned either. They have ruled out BPH> and before the biopsy I suggested a free PSA test which the GP> had not even heard of (and would not authorise). I also> suggested a month of Cipro to rule out prostatitis, but the GP> doen't deem it appropriate as my brother had no discomfort! I'm> sure prostatitis is often symtom free?As I understand it, "prostatitis" is a term that just means"inflammation of the prostate". It is often asymptomatic. Acourse of antibiotics doesn't rule it out because a lot ofprostatitis, some think the majority of cases, are not caused bybacterial infection or, perhaps in some cases, there is abacterial infection but the antibiotic doesn't affect it.As for your brother's denial, I understand that and did itmyself. My GP never specified a PSA test but I went to the laband a woman at the lab (perhaps her father had prostate cancer?)added a check mark to the PSA test box on the list of lab teststhat the clinic did. I saw her do it and asked why she did andshe just said, "You ought to have a PSA test."It came back high and I was referred to a urologist. I thoughtthat was unnecessary. The urologist said I needed a biopsy. Ithought that was ridiculous. The urologist himself said therewas only a 15% chance that I had cancer. And I was obviouslyvery healthy. If I had cancer, I'd know it, wouldn't I? Butboth doctors insisted and I decided that I better yield to theirsuperior knowledge.> Thankfully he is now under the care of one of Newcastle's> (city) hospitals and it is the second largest cancer 'centre of> excellence' within the UK NHS system. I will pass on your info> as I myself have found that even when dealing with the most> erudite specialist in the private sector (here in Spain) it is> well worth having ideas of your own and reminding them of> possibilities.Does that mean that he is now having his high PSA investigated?Or is he still, as you say, in denial?I am the kind of person who shies away from giving othersforceful personal advice. After all, who am I to intrude onanother's life and tell them what to do? So I tend to say thingslike, "If I were in your situation I think I might ..." or "Youmight consider ..." or "Perhaps you can ask your doctor if ..."But I'm not sure that's always the best course.Alan

[Guest guest]

I don’t know how good your relationship is

with your brother, but can I suggest that you do not tell him that he is in denial

just because he does not regard his PSA levels as seriously as you  do. I can

assure you, from personal experience, that it is very annoying. By all means

guide him to information that you believe is appropriate, but he has to choose

what he wants to do, what suits him.

I was told repeatedly that I was in denial

even though I had been diagnosed with prostate cancer. What I was “denying†was

that it was essential for me to have surgery immediately – a very foolish and

life threatening decision according to the chorus of voices. Just why I denied

the surgeons the opportunity to make any money from me is set out more fully in

http://www.yananow.org/whynotsurgery.htm

All the best

Prostate men need enlightening, not

frightening

Terry

Herbert - diagnosed in 1996 and

still going strong

Read A Strange Place for unbiased information at http://www.yananow.org/StrangePlace/index.html

From: ProstateCancerSupport [mailto:ProstateCancerSupport ] On Behalf Of El Horizonte

Sent: Monday, 19 September 2011

8:10 PM

To: ProstateCancerSupport

Subject: Re: :

Don M. --Update



 

Hello Chuck,

Thank you for the second link. I will pass that on to my

brother.

I think my brother is unfortunately in denial, I have tried

to push him along as much as possible but must admit I decided not to sugest

too many of the bad possibilities until after his biopsy. He is in a very rural

part of Northumerland (Northern England) and

his GP, despite being in his early thirties does not seem to be very concerned

either. They have ruled out BPH and before the biopsy I suggested a free PSA

test which the GP had not even heard of (and would not authorise). I also

suggested a month of Cipro to rule out prostatitis, but the GP doen't deem it

appropriate as my brother had no discomfort! I'm sure prostatitis is often

symtom free?

Thankfully he is now under the care of one of Newcastle's (city)

hospitals and it is the second largest cancer 'centre of excellence'

within the UK NHS system. I will pass on your info as I myself have found that

even when dealing with the most erudite specialist in the private sector (here

in Spain)

it is well worth having ideas of your own and reminding them of possibilities.

Many thanks,

Spain

[Guest guest]



Hi Terry,

Thank you, but I would not do anything so crass! I do know my brother very well, which is precisely why I have not been pushy offering him advice as to what he must do. When I said in my post that I was pushing him along I was reffering to asking his doctor that he gets the full range of tests available (as his doctor doesn't seem to be very experinced in matters PC) to establish his actual situation.While I think the UK NHS offers a very good standard of care it is also very easy to drop through the cracks and be ignored (and left without treatment) if you do not push for your entitlements.

My own experience feels very recent, and while information is gratefully received by me, being 'strongly advised' doesn't go down well with me either! He knows I'm here if there is anything he does want information on. If he choses AS that is fine by me - and would likely be my choice in his situation with a negative biopsy - but doing nothing is not the same as AS.

Best regards,

Spain

RE: : Don M. --Update

I don’t know how good your relationship is with your brother, but can I suggest that you do not tell him that he is in denial just because he does not regard his PSA levels as seriously as you do. I can assure you, from personal experience, that it is very annoying. By all means guide him to information that you believe is appropriate, but he has to choose what he wants to do, what suits him.

I was told repeatedly that I was in denial even though I had been diagnosed with prostate cancer. What I was “denying†was that it was essential for me to have surgery immediately – a very foolish and life threatening decision according to the chorus of voices. Just why I denied the surgeons the opportunity to make any money from me is set out more fully in http://www.yananow.org/whynotsurgery.htm

All the best

Prostate men need enlightening, not frightening

Terry Herbert - diagnosed in 1996 and still going strong

Read A Strange Place for unbiased information at http://www.yananow.org/StrangePlace/index.html

From: ProstateCancerSupport [mailto:ProstateCancerSupport ] On Behalf Of El HorizonteSent: Monday, 19 September 2011 8:10 PMTo: ProstateCancerSupport Subject: Re: : Don M. --Update



Hello Chuck,

Thank you for the second link. I will pass that on to my brother.

I think my brother is unfortunately in denial, I have tried to push him along as much as possible but must admit I decided not to sugest too many of the bad possibilities until after his biopsy. He is in a very rural part of Northumerland (Northern England) and his GP, despite being in his early thirties does not seem to be very concerned either. They have ruled out BPH and before the biopsy I suggested a free PSA test which the GP had not even heard of (and would not authorise). I also suggested a month of Cipro to rule out prostatitis, but the GP doen't deem it appropriate as my brother had no discomfort! I'm sure prostatitis is often symtom free?

Thankfully he is now under the care of one of Newcastle's (city) hospitals and it is the second largest cancer 'centre of excellence' within the UK NHS system. I will pass on your info as I myself have found that even when dealing with the most erudite specialist in the private sector (here in Spain) it is well worth having ideas of your own and reminding them of possibilities.

Many thanks,

Spain