Re: Victims Panel? (was: Powerlessness)

[Guest guest]

> , what is " Victims Panel " ?

> Cheers,

>

> nz

My sister sideswiped a car one night. She left her name and insurance

info and went home.

Next day a cop came to the house to talk to her about it. He asked

her if she'd been drinking. She, (niave in the extreme) said that

she'd had " a beer. "

The cop sited her for drunk driving on the spot.

My mom went with her to a thing, and I *think* they called it a

" victim's panel. " It was a trauma nurse that presented movies of the

results of drunk driving. It was extremely graphic, an at one point

showed a decapitated baby.

My mom has never been the same since. I don't know how my sister

reacted, she never told me.

[Guest guest]

Victim's Panel: A meeting of two sets of people: 1) Those who are

family/friends of people who have died or have been seriously debilitated

due to a drunk driver killing/debilitating their loved one(s) and 2) People

who have been arrested for drunk driving.

The meeting is basically the victims telling their gut and heart wrenching

personal stories to an audience of people who must listen. My husband was

so affected by this that he said it was the actual beginning of the end of

drinking for him. He actually never drove again with any alcohol in him

after that meeting. He still, to this day, says he remembers a mother named

Pat who lost her teenage son. Says he remembers what she looked like, her

story, and that it made him cry to hear the story. My husband DOES NOT CRY

as a general rule. So when he came home shaking and literally white as a

sheet, I knew it was a good thing (policy-wise).

He was particularly disturbed by the man sitting next to him though (a DUI

arrestee) ... apparently the man made rude comments under his breath, sighed

heavily a lot etc. My husband said that he was so close to taking this man

outside and kicking his ass that it was all he could do to contain himself.

The man left the room at the end of the meeting and was gone before my

husband could act on the ass kicking. This man obviously was not affected

by the meeting. Obviously not ready to stop drinking.

At any rate, this is something that is almost always part of sentencing for

DUI's.

Thanks for asking

lisak

Victims Panel? (was: Powerlessness)

> , what is " Victims Panel " ?

> Cheers,

>

> nz

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi

Although it seems to have been effective in your hubby's case, it's

not a good idea to jump too quickly to deciding that this kind of

thing is always helpful. A decent guy like your hubby would probably

respond to less graphic and truamtizing methods, whereas the a**hole

sitting next to him might be made worse.

P.

> Victim's Panel: A meeting of two sets of people: 1) Those who are

> family/friends of people who have died or have been seriously

debilitated

> due to a drunk driver killing/debilitating their loved one(s) and 2)

People

> who have been arrested for drunk driving.

>

> The meeting is basically the victims telling their gut and heart

wrenching

> personal stories to an audience of people who must listen. My

husband was

> so affected by this that he said it was the actual beginning of the

end of

> drinking for him. He actually never drove again with any alcohol in

him

> after that meeting. He still, to this day, says he remembers a

mother named

> Pat who lost her teenage son. Says he remembers what she looked

like, her

> story, and that it made him cry to hear the story. My husband DOES

NOT CRY

> as a general rule. So when he came home shaking and literally white

as a

> sheet, I knew it was a good thing (policy-wise).

>

> He was particularly disturbed by the man sitting next to him though

(a DUI

> arrestee) ... apparently the man made rude comments under his

breath, sighed

> heavily a lot etc. My husband said that he was so close to taking

this man

> outside and kicking his ass that it was all he could do to contain

himself.

> The man left the room at the end of the meeting and was gone before

my

> husband could act on the ass kicking. This man obviously was not

affected

> by the meeting. Obviously not ready to stop drinking.

>

> At any rate, this is something that is almost always part of

sentencing for

> DUI's.

> Thanks for asking

> lisak

> Victims Panel? (was: Powerlessness)

>

>

> > , what is " Victims Panel " ?

> > Cheers,

> >

> > nz

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

At 06:11 PM 7/2/01 +0000, you wrote:

>Hi

>

>Although it seems to have been effective in your hubby's case, it's

>not a good idea to jump too quickly to deciding that this kind of

>thing is always helpful. A decent guy like your hubby would probably

>respond to less graphic and truamtizing methods, whereas the a**hole

>sitting next to him might be made worse.

I was in a victim panel once. The woman running it didn't do a very

good job IMO. She told us all what horrible people we were, and

engaged in some petty power plays (such as insisting that people

change seats). This sort of nonsense interfered with the impact

of the story of her son's death, which probably would have been

effective if she'd just stuck to that.

[Guest guest]

Yeah, kinda like XA, you can't count on any consistency.

Re: Re: Victims Panel? (was: Powerlessness)

> At 06:11 PM 7/2/01 +0000, you wrote:

> >Hi

> >

> >Although it seems to have been effective in your hubby's case, it's

> >not a good idea to jump too quickly to deciding that this kind of

> >thing is always helpful. A decent guy like your hubby would probably

> >respond to less graphic and truamtizing methods, whereas the a**hole

> >sitting next to him might be made worse.

>

> I was in a victim panel once. The woman running it didn't do a very

> good job IMO. She told us all what horrible people we were, and

> engaged in some petty power plays (such as insisting that people

> change seats). This sort of nonsense interfered with the impact

> of the story of her son's death, which probably would have been

> effective if she'd just stuck to that.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>