Re: BPD and Inappropriate reactions

November 19, 2010

That is just awful that you weren't taken to the hospital right away, and have

paid for the neglect with chronic pain.

-Annie

>

> BTW,,,I crushed 4 disks in my lower back in that skating accident...that was

my real injury in which I didn't go to the hospital.

>

November 20, 2010

Hi Annie,

Ok,I'm glad to know my post wasn't too much I think you're right

that there are strong features of sociopathy/psychopathy present in some of our

BPD parents.My own nada seems to be a mix of both BPD and psychopathy,which is

quite a strange combo given that the one (BPD) is pathological *over reaction*

to one's own emotions while the other (psychopathy) is pathological *under

reaction* to emotion.

But I have witnessed both states co-existing within my nada.Like what

you said about your nada being able to wait for just the opportune moment to

strike--that is the cold,premeditated calculation of psychopathy,not the

reflexive emotional reactivity of BPD.And while the latter occurs with the

intent to cause the other person to *feel* the BPD's pain (like using the other

person as a container or receptacle?) the former is,like you said,purely

intended to cause harm for its own sake (or for the sake of having the power to

cause harm,but as an end in itself--not to discharge pain but simply to inflict

it).

What you wrote about your nada's cat and your speculations as to why she

had that apparent grief reaction--I've noticed that I have also attributed sort

of " typically human " reactions to some of my nada's seemingly tender

feelings,such as how you as what the posters of the " psychopath blog " call a

" neurotypical " or an " empath " ,wondered if your nada's tears over the death of

her cat might have been repressed grief over your dad's death coming up

indirectly.I suppose that is possible.But I think it's also true that it is

often nearly impossible for us as nons to even conceive of what actually drives

our PD parents--believe me,there have been many instances when I sought to

" humanize " nada's reactions by wondering if they might be along the lines of

something I,as an " empath " ,might have felt.But on reflection or the few times

nada herself " clued " me in with her own take on it,they aren't--not what I would

have felt or thought or done but something very " other " .

Again,this can only be speculation,but it's just as possible your nada

was so torn up over the death of her cat because it was something she had no

control or power over--she wanted more to continue to *have* the cat and when

her power to *have* what she wanted the way she wanted it was " taken " from

her,it felt like an assault on her need to control and what she was crying over

was her own powerlessness,not really the loss of the cat as the cat in itself.

While I was living in France my nada adopted a kitten with Down

Syndrome.I had never known it's even possible for a feline to have Down Syndrome

but I met this cat myself during a Xmas visit and she really did have it--stocky

little body and facial features just like a person with Down Syndrome; inability

to groom herself,etc.She was also incredibly cute.

Nada had " always wanted " a child with Down Syndrome.Can you imagine

that? Actually *wanting* your own baby to be afflicted with a condition like

that? But to nada's mind,such a child would be " the perfect child " ,presumably

because she assumed they'd be under her total control at all times.So having a

cat with Down Syndrome was like a dream come true for her,a fur kid by proxy.

She took this cat into school with her every day (she was a grammar

school teacher) and her students took turns holding her on their laps all

day.Here was a cat that was completely passive with none of the regular feline

independence--you could plant that cat on your lap and she'd just sit there

purring forever.

This poor little cat suffered from upper respitory problems and the vet

proscribed some liquid medication (I don't remember what exactly).One morning

while getting ready for work nada gave the cat her medicine and she choked on it

and tragically died despite nada's frantic efforts to revive her.

Nada was absolutely devastated.She called out sick to work crying

hysterically and since everyone at the school also knew and loved the cat,they

totally sympathized with nada's distress.I think she ended up taking that entire

week off.Her cherished dream of having absolute control over another living

thing (in that case even tailor made to her Down Syndrome child fantasy)had

ended horribly.

I'm sure other people only saw a pet owner grieving the tragic loss of

her very special and unique kitty,which is precisely what that would have been

for anyone else.But nada's devastation was due to losing something she totally

controlled,not the terrible pain of not being able to prevent the cat's

suffering and dying because she loved her,as in hurting more for the cat than

for herself,but simply because she had been powerless at the moment when the cat

died and hadn't wanted that to happen and of course could never ever bear

feeling powerless.

And your nada getting misty eyed when mentioning her deceased

father...I don't know of course but it's possible that your nada's memories of

her father include the pleasurable recall of having had him wrapped around her

little finger in some ways (so that's a loss worth sniffling about),although I

know your nada has also alleged that he beat her.These people are so

complicated! It's almost like a bizarre sado-masochism: the sado (psychopath)

waxing " nostalgic " for the power lost and the erstwhile masochist (BPD) wanting

to figuratively cash in on the capitol of alleged victimization,using the same

person for both ends.What *is* that,then? It certainly doesn't seem like " pure "

BPD,to me.Because wouldn't a BPD never know for certain that they did have power

over someone,like their father (you have also said that your nada's parents

allowed her to misbehave/didn't seem to know how to handle her/didn't confront

her),so the BPD would be in a constant default victim position vis a vis their

relationship with say their father and would only tear up talking about how he

had allegedly beaten her? I mean,what is your nada saying about her deceased

father when she gets that quavery voice? I guess that would be more telling as

to what her motivation for (apparent grief) is?

When my nada's mother died she never cried,never broke down,didn't seem

traumatized by it--I kept waiting for that to happen and expecting it but it

never did.The only grief-like thing she ever said to me was,out of the blue the

day after she died, " I'll miss my mommy. "

Said in a childlike tone but without any agony,as if she was trying to

sound grief stricken but could only come up with something a small child might

say.It was mega creepy.She never said anything like that again and never later

ever mentioned missing anything about her relationship with my grandmother and

never cried or got teary eyed or *anything* if the subject of my grandmother

came up.My grandmother had actually been a " mommy " to nada in ways nada never

was to me,yet once she had passed on it was like her " mommy-ness " was moot aside

from that one very brief instance when nada said she'd miss her.And knowing

nada,when she said she'd miss her mommy,it *felt* to me that what she meant

was, " I'll miss all the things she did for me " ....She had been at her mother's

bedside when she died--I was at my fada's bedside when he died and seeing him

die had been really upsetting to me yet nada never seemed to be upset at

all--for me watching my father die was so painfully distressing because I

couldn't make it better for *him*,but nada watching her own mother die seemed to

mean nothing to her.Had she ever really loved her mother at all? Or are *all* of

her relationships just illusions of " love " and " caring " but are in actuality

mere gradations of power and control? All she cared about when fada died was

that he was leaving *her*--a consideration of hurting for *his* suffering seemed

not to enter into her knee jerk analysis of his death as a cost/benefit equation

to *herself*.

>

> ((())) No, you haven't crossed any lines with me, and I thank you for

posting your opinion/speculation. I hadn't been aware of those particular

psychopathic traits before but it makes sense to me: that once someone is dead

they are of no further use to the psychopath, so they show little emotion about

it. I've speculated before that my nada has shown some antisocial (or

psychopathic) traits, so, I'm open to the idea; very much so. I've even

referred to my nada as a " walking Cluster B " before, to get the point across.

>

> A part of this particular story that I didn't include in my last post, is that

a full two years (or more) after dad's death, my nada had to have her pet cat

put to sleep because it was very old and in pain, and she told me that she'd had

a complete breakdown/hysterical crying jag over the cat's death (!!?) It made

me wonder if perhaps she'd repressed her grief over losing dad so thoroughly

that she was only able to access her grief two+ years later, and indirectly,

triggered by the death of a pet?

>

> But on the other hand I've never once in the 12+ years following dad's death

personally observed her becoming sad or misty-eyed over dad's being gone. She

never fondly mentions him, that something or other reminds her of him, or that

she misses him; nothing like that... and I have thought that was both cold and

odd. She will grow misty-eyed and quavery-voiced when mentioning her own

father, however.

>

> I can only guess that nada ceased loving my dad at some point, and doesn't

miss him or think about him fondly at all.

>

> But whether any of my speculations RE nada and dad's relationship are accurate

or not, I've also wondered if my mothers need to " get back " at me for perceived

slights, her apparent enjoyment when she'd put me down or humiliate me and make

me cry, and her ability to patiently wait for precisely the most opportune

moment to do so, is due to psychopathic traits as opposed to " just " her bpd. I

really do wonder about that.

>

> It seems likely.

>

> -Annie

November 20, 2010

Awesome theorizing! I think your speculations about the way the psychopathic

brain works are probably right on target, based on reading the blogs by

psychopaths at that site. (Its interesting to me that they are *aware* that

they do not experience the emotional state of " empathy " and they speculate about

what " empathy " and " guilt " and " remorse " must feel like. Fascinating and creepy

at the same time.)

It hadn't occurred to me that my nada's unusually strong grief reaction to

having her cat put down might be the psychopathic loss of control you described,

but its certainly possible. Unlike your nada's cat dying by accident,

unexpectedly, my nada's cat was very old and it was nada's choice to have the

cat euthanized. So, either dynamic could have been in play, I suppose.

That is completely fascinating that your nada actually wished to have a Down's

syndrome child, and wound up with a Down's syndrome cat. And indeed, some of

the lower-functioning Down's syndrome children are very placid and biddable, and

the little cat sounds similar!

I think your theory as to why she wanted such a child is probably accurate: she

wanted total, absolute, unending control over another human being. Wow.

I believe my nada treated me as though she expected me to be an inanimate object

with no individual thoughts, feelings, or needs of my own that differed from

hers. Yet my nada's narcissism would have been offended if I'd been a Down's

syndrome child; her need to be seen as perfect and her need for Sister and me to

be perfect would have overridden her desire for an obedient child who would

never grow up.

The whole dynamic between my nada and her father IS odd, I agree. And even more

so because my nada's memories are probably very skewed. My nada's sisters do

NOT confirm that their father had a horrible temper and beat them, that's just

nada's perception. (My own observation of my grandfather is that he was not a

scary man full of repressed rage, he was just a nice, normal guy who treated his

family with kindness and love.) Yet my nada always claimed that her father had

a terrible temper, he beat her, she was afraid of him, and yet she loved him

deeply because " he loved her and her mother didn't. " That does sound completely

sado-masochistic, I agree. And creepy. And SO weird because my own

observations RE my grandparents were at such odds to what she was claiming.

So, its very interesting to me to get your objective viewpoint on my family's

dynamics.

Thanks!

-Annie

> >

> > ((())) No, you haven't crossed any lines with me, and I thank you

for posting your opinion/speculation. I hadn't been aware of those particular

psychopathic traits before but it makes sense to me: that once someone is dead

they are of no further use to the psychopath, so they show little emotion about

it. I've speculated before that my nada has shown some antisocial (or

psychopathic) traits, so, I'm open to the idea; very much so. I've even

referred to my nada as a " walking Cluster B " before, to get the point across.

> >

> > A part of this particular story that I didn't include in my last post, is

that a full two years (or more) after dad's death, my nada had to have her pet

cat put to sleep because it was very old and in pain, and she told me that she'd

had a complete breakdown/hysterical crying jag over the cat's death (!!?) It

made me wonder if perhaps she'd repressed her grief over losing dad so

thoroughly that she was only able to access her grief two+ years later, and

indirectly, triggered by the death of a pet?

> >

> > But on the other hand I've never once in the 12+ years following dad's death

personally observed her becoming sad or misty-eyed over dad's being gone. She

never fondly mentions him, that something or other reminds her of him, or that

she misses him; nothing like that... and I have thought that was both cold and

odd. She will grow misty-eyed and quavery-voiced when mentioning her own

father, however.

> >

> > I can only guess that nada ceased loving my dad at some point, and doesn't

miss him or think about him fondly at all.

> >

> > But whether any of my speculations RE nada and dad's relationship are

accurate or not, I've also wondered if my mothers need to " get back " at me for

perceived slights, her apparent enjoyment when she'd put me down or humiliate me

and make me cry, and her ability to patiently wait for precisely the most

opportune moment to do so, is due to psychopathic traits as opposed to " just "

her bpd. I really do wonder about that.

> >

> > It seems likely.

> >

> > -Annie

>

November 20, 2010

Hhhmmm,Annie,your nada saying she deeply loved the same father who tormented her

with (evidently non existent) belt beatings because he loved her while her

(apparently loving) mother didn't is pretty twisted.My nada has always claimed

that my grandfather was a tyrant and it took me a long time to work that one out

because in my experience he wasn't.It seems more that she projects her own

aggressive traits onto her father as a way of disowning them.

I used to wonder if my grandfather had mellowed *considerably* by the

time I was born since according to nada when she was a kid you couldn't even

breathe too loud at the dinner table or Pop had a fit--the same guy who seemed

pretty laid back and easy going to me.

Yet she has also mentioned pitching the kinds of fits herself that the

child of a true tyrant would *never* dare to do,such as refusing to attend

school for days after Pop failed to appear to watch one of her tennis matches in

high school or refusing to open the rest of her presents one Xmas when she was

fourteen because she had asked for a leather jacket and her parents had bought

her a denim one instead.And they both caved in to her and promised to take the

denim one back and buy her the leather one--and they did! Now,*who* was the

tyrant?

In the book " And I Don't Want To Live This Life " by Deborah Spungen,about

her daughter (at the time undiagnosed as BPD but who is now considered to

be a " classic case " of severe BPD with very strong sociopathic traits,if not

actual co-morbid ASPD),Deborah writes about how began to accuse her father

of " beating " her from about the age of twelve onward.,the father,was

devastated by these false accusations because for years he had been going with

his wife and from psychiatrist to psychotherapist trying to get her help

and Deborah was baffled because she couldn't understand how could claim

something she *had* to know wasn't true.This wasn't a family in denial: 's

problems were so severe they couldn't be denied,such as attacking her babysitter

with a pair of scissors,almost killing the family cat,and being kicked out of

the public school system in the seventh grade,among many other things.

Deborah and 's marriage became very strained at points from dealing

with and trying to follow the misguided advice they were getting from the

therapists they saw,who tended to blame *them* for 's problems.But they

were never abusive to one another and weren't themselves personality disordered

types,nor were their other two children.

was stabbed to death at the age of I think it was twenty one by

her boyfriend,the punk rocker Sid Vicious.A few days before she was killed,she

asked her mother during a telephone conversation, " Did Daddy ever beat you? "

Again,Deborah was baffled.How could even ask her such a question?

How could she think that would ever do something like that,something so

completely out of character for him?

Yet had told other people the same thing: that her father used to

beat her.

It was like she couldn't see her father for who he actually was,or how

he actually was,but had to impose this weird sadomasochistic dynamic onto their

relationship--something that existed in *her* mind but not in fact.And then when

she left home and had her first serious longterm intimate relationship,it was so

sadomasochistic,it killed her.But that was not the kind of relationship her

parents had had together nor the kind of relationship they had role modeled for

her. also always claimed that had a terrible temper when *she* was

the one who screamed obscenities at him.

She also claimed that her parents had never loved her--something that

caused Deborah and great anguish.They came to the conclusion that this

belief of hers was due to 's inability to love anyone herself--she had no

real idea of what love even is.Although they had tried and tried and tried to

show her love.

I can imagine someone like your nada feeling very insulted if they had a

Down Syndrome baby,lol.I think for my nada that particular fantasy also involved

*her* looking perfect in comparison--or receiving what she fantasied would be

endless sympathy from others for her,the poor mother of the handicapped child.

Deciding to have her cat put to sleep wouldn't necessarily preclude your

nada from feeling powerless about it.One of the nastiest,creepiest things my

nada did was take me along with her to the vets' when I was twelve to have our

cat put down,the cat I had grown up with.When we got there,she handed the cat

over to be euthanized and walked away,as I stood there begging to be able to go

with the cat and hold her while they gave her the needle,and was ignored by

all.Nada had decided to have the cat put down because she had kidney failure and

was clearly suffering,but I think that she also knew she'd feel like she wasn't

in control if she had to be there while it was done,so handing the cat over and

walking off was her way of remaining in control.She never cried about it

later,though.The only time I ever saw her cry over a pet was when our gerbil's

babies got twisted up in some nesting material she had bought and some of them

died--but that again was unexpected and out of her control and she was crying

because she felt like it was a " nightmare " .It was,actually.

Do you think your nada is aware of not feeling empathy? I find it

fascinating and creepy too that they *know* they are feeling nothing nice.They

even joke about it on that site.Something else I found interesting is that when

they've spoken about *trying* to make a sustained effort to be " nice " without

reverting to nasty just for its own sake,their system short circuits and they

become so out of sorts that they feel like they *have* to lash out.As if being

nice as an end in itself is toxic to them if they allow it to go on for too

long.That was actually a pattern Spungen had--so all of her therapist's

attempts to get her to modify her impulses to do harm by being " good " backfired

again and again and led to even worse behavior.The people posting on that site

have said that what psychopaths understand best is incentives as a consequence:

if you refrain from punching Chuckie for a month,you'll get a day's leave

pass.But imposing consequences on them without incentives never works,as in: If

you punch Chuckie,you'll be put in solitary confinement elicits a reaction in

them of punching Chuckie anyway.They've said that they can only really be

controlled via incentives to behave with the removal of the *incentive* as the

consequence to bad behavior.Which does amount to constantly blackmailing others

into giving them an incentive to behave.The higher functioning ones create their

own incentives: if I seduce this woman with the intention of dumping her cold as

soon as I get bored instead of just grabbing her and raping her right now,I will

get to have my power thrill without the risk of doing jail time.But if there is

no incentive to control their urges,such as being able to have their thrill

while maintaining their freedom,they will simply give in to them on the

spot.Without an incentive to " play nice " (or nicer than they'd rather be),they

will have the nasty fest they *really* want.

What you said about your nada wanting you to be an extension of herself

like an inanimate object with no autonomous qualities of your own seems more

indicative of BPD or NPD to me.I'm still puzzling over that one with my own nada

because she did to that to me as well to some extent but she also vampirized my

spirit in ways that go much farther and deeper than just roping me to her

identity.What psychopaths want is to *consume* the other person's qualities

because the psychopath knows that they are empty--if they suppressed the other

person's qualities then they wouldn't have ready access to them.They want to

devour innocence or sweetness or talent but it's not a competition like it is

for say an NPD who always thinks along the lines of " this town isn't big enough

for the two of us " ,only ONE of us can be sweet and it's gonna be me not you.Or

the pathological symbiosis demanded by the BPD: what do you mean that sweetness

is yours,no it's not,it's mine--well we're the same person so what's the

difference? The psychopath thinks: Hhhmm,you're sweet...I'll take that until

it's all used up--they *feed* on other peoples' qualities and they *leave*

inanimate objects in their wake,aka empty shells that have been sucked dry of

their essence.NPDs will stamp you down and try to keep their foot stuck to your

head so you can't get up and challenge them.BPDs will cling to you and drag you

down even if you both go under.Psychopaths will either cut you right down with

the full intent of purposefully crippling or killing your sweetness since

destroying it is also a way of devouring it or they will draw you in by

mirroring your sweetness as if they are of a kind with you when all the while

they intend to make a meal of it and of you--and they *know* that their

disarming imitation of *your* sweetness is a trick to get you where they want

you: within easy devouring range.Either way,they are consuming whatever quality

of yours it is that they want.On that blog under the question " Do sociopaths

love? " the blog owner wrote: " When I kiss someone,I want to suck out their

soul " ....

>

> Awesome theorizing! I think your speculations about the way the psychopathic

brain works are probably right on target, based on reading the blogs by

psychopaths at that site. (Its interesting to me that they are *aware* that

they do not experience the emotional state of " empathy " and they speculate about

what " empathy " and " guilt " and " remorse " must feel like. Fascinating and creepy

at the same time.)

>

> It hadn't occurred to me that my nada's unusually strong grief reaction to

having her cat put down might be the psychopathic loss of control you described,

but its certainly possible. Unlike your nada's cat dying by accident,

unexpectedly, my nada's cat was very old and it was nada's choice to have the

cat euthanized. So, either dynamic could have been in play, I suppose.

>

> That is completely fascinating that your nada actually wished to have a Down's

syndrome child, and wound up with a Down's syndrome cat. And indeed, some of

the lower-functioning Down's syndrome children are very placid and biddable, and

the little cat sounds similar!

> I think your theory as to why she wanted such a child is probably accurate:

she wanted total, absolute, unending control over another human being. Wow.

>

> I believe my nada treated me as though she expected me to be an inanimate

object with no individual thoughts, feelings, or needs of my own that differed

from hers. Yet my nada's narcissism would have been offended if I'd been a

Down's syndrome child; her need to be seen as perfect and her need for Sister

and me to be perfect would have overridden her desire for an obedient child who

would never grow up.

>

> The whole dynamic between my nada and her father IS odd, I agree. And even

more so because my nada's memories are probably very skewed. My nada's sisters

do NOT confirm that their father had a horrible temper and beat them, that's

just nada's perception. (My own observation of my grandfather is that he was

not a scary man full of repressed rage, he was just a nice, normal guy who

treated his family with kindness and love.) Yet my nada always claimed that

her father had a terrible temper, he beat her, she was afraid of him, and yet

she loved him deeply because " he loved her and her mother didn't. " That does

sound completely sado-masochistic, I agree. And creepy. And SO weird because

my own observations RE my grandparents were at such odds to what she was

claiming.

>

> So, its very interesting to me to get your objective viewpoint on my family's

dynamics.

>

> Thanks!

>

> -Annie

November 20, 2010

Yes, it is confusing. My nada's version of her childhood is not corroborated by

her own sisters; they are bewildered by nada's claims that all three of them

were beaten often by their terrible-tempered dad, with a strop. My aunt's

version is that their dad, one time, after much verbal remonstrance and

reminders, had come into their room and spanked them briefly on top of the

several layers of sheet/blankets/quilt, because they all kept giggling and

keeping him awake. Her sisters don't understand at all why my nada claims that

their mother rejected nada and preferred her oldest daughter, and my aunts were

poleaxed with astonishment when Sister shared with them that tales of abuse and

neglect had been fed to us since babyhood.

It made it highly bewildering when I was little, to be told one day how

frightened my mother had been of her dad, how angry and violent he was, but that

she loved him anyway (!?) and how her mother didn't love her at all... and then

the next day be told with delight that we were going to visit granny and grandpa

for Sunday dinner! Then I'd watch as my nada gushed and fawned over her parents

and watch as my grandparents behaved just like they always did: like normal,

regular, sweet, kind people...? (No violence from grandpa, ever. No coldness

from granny, ever.) When I was very little I believed my mother and was leery of

my grandpa, scared of making him angry, but as I grew older I could see that

there was a big disconnect between what my mother claimed and the reality I

experienced. It was very, very confusing.

My nada is the only adult I ever saw pitching red-faced, screaming,

spittle-flying tantrums out of rage, being physically violent, and verbally

attacking others (me, Sister, dad, and her own older sister.) Like in the story

you mentioned, I think my own nada had always been the tyrant in her foo and she

simply projected her own tyranny and violence and rejecting behaviors onto her

foo members.

My nada also made a point for most of my life of disparaging and denigrating her

older sister to me, I suppose hoping to make me hate her as much as nada did,

yet this aunt is and always has been a sweet, dear, lovable person who never

held it against me that my mother is (or used to be) so hateful to her. In that

one respect, my nada has mellowed. The last time she attacked her sister in my

presence was about 8 years ago, and my Sister has told me that nada even had a

visit with her older sister not too long ago. I guess miracles can happen.

I don't understand enough about abnormal psychology to understand why the

long-term fixed delusions that my nada appears to have are *not* considered

psychotic? This tendency of hers to re-write history to fit her feelings (her

insisting that my dad had affairs all the time and beat her, for example), her

" selective memory " (her denial that she ever hit Sister and me, for example)

why aren't things like that considered to be psychotic?! My nada has an

alternate reality she's living in in which she is perfect and a perpetual

victim, and (apparently) the only thing that keeps *that* from being " psychotic "

is that it doesn't include her hearing voices that aren't there or seeing people

that aren't there. But its everything BUT that. I don't get it; how can living

in a reality that's 80 degrees off of real be anything *but* psychotic?

So bizarre, so confusing, and so at odds with itself, this personality disorder

stuff.

-Annie

" When I kiss someone,I want to suck out their

soul " ....

>

November 21, 2010

" When I kiss someone,I want to suck out their

soul " ....

>

, I really like your analogies on how NPD, BPD, and sociopaths would

approach another person's " sweetness " . I wonder what script you'd give the BPD

wolf to say? I posted this elsewhere but thought you might find it interesting

too even though it's about NPD vs. sociopathy...it comes from that same website

you found....

----------------------------

So I've been reading with great unease the sociopathworld website in an effort

to understand these people better and answer some open questions about my NF and

various ex-bf's. I found this bit about the difference between narcissists and

sociopaths interesting...I'll quote the relevant bit here:

Here is a good illustration of the differences between narcissists and

sociopaths that I found here:

Narcissist wolf says to everyone:

" I'm a sheep, I'm a sheep, I'm in the sheep club. The sheep are the best.

Those wolves are terrible. You have to be a special sheep to be in the high-wool

club like me. If you don't believe I'm a sheep then you are calling me a liar. I

was only eating meat because my boss made me do it. I was howling at the moon

because you made me angry. I have always been a sheep. You are paranoid, I don't

have canine teeth. You are imagining it. I'm a sheep. I won best sheep of the

year award. We have to be on the look out for SueTarget. She's a wolf in sheeps'

clothing. I am the one that did all the work. SueTarget messed it all up.

SueTargets's fur looks fake. I'm the biggest sheep so I should be the boss. I

have every right to punish SueTarget and eat her. It will be good for her, and

teach her a lesson. I'm not doing it for me, I'm doing it for the team. I have

to be the enforcer here and eat bad sheeps to help keep society clean. I used to

be a vegetarian but because all these lazy sheep won't do anything, I am forced

into keeping order and forced into being the bad guy and have to do all the

eating of sheep. "

Sociopath wolf says:

" Become the sheep. Believe you are the sheep. Keep the wolf hidden. Don't

act like a narcissist and don't try to " talk your way " . Become the sheep. Do

sheep things. Behave like sheep. No one will see the wolf. Baa baa baa. Eat

grass for a while. Give up meat for a while. Tell the sheep things that will

make them feel good about themselves. Gain their trust. Be humble. Make them the

center of attention. Get them to lower their defenses. Tell them you lost your

teeth in a car accident and your parents could only afford wolf-teeth

replacements. Keep past a secret so they don't research. Let them do all the

talking. Then when the time is right, devour! It is worth the sacrifice and the

wait. Then on a polygraph when they ask if I am a sheep, I will have all the

sheep memories because I became a sheep. I have memories of eating grass and

living like a sheep. I'm telling the truth. "

http://www.sociopathworld.com/2008/08/why-i-hate-narcissists.html

November 21, 2010