Guest guest Posted November 26, 2010 Report Share Posted November 26, 2010 > 2. I wish people would understand that I have had an enormous weight on me for my entire life and every effort I make in life is with that huge weight added for resistance. Hell yeah, ! I've felt this frustration my whole life that people don't get it what I've overcome and still live with. It especially enrages me when I feel like I'm lifting 100 lbs. (with an invisible 500 stacked on so I've really got 600) and some person who's had all the advantages is lifting 150 lbs. and telling me " work harder...put your back into it, if I can do it you can do it! " and " Oh here maybe if you read this book about how to be happy you'll stop psyching yourself out and be able to lift 150 with ease like me! " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 26, 2010 Report Share Posted November 26, 2010 > 2. I wish people would understand that I have had an enormous weight on me for my entire life and every effort I make in life is with that huge weight added for resistance. Hell yeah, ! I've felt this frustration my whole life that people don't get it what I've overcome and still live with. It especially enrages me when I feel like I'm lifting 100 lbs. (with an invisible 500 stacked on so I've really got 600) and some person who's had all the advantages is lifting 150 lbs. and telling me " work harder...put your back into it, if I can do it you can do it! " and " Oh here maybe if you read this book about how to be happy you'll stop psyching yourself out and be able to lift 150 with ease like me! " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 26, 2010 Report Share Posted November 26, 2010 & , There's so much extra weight because, not only do we not have the standard *help* that parents are supposed to give, we also have extra weight instead, as our parents try to actively prevent us from success and happiness. And of course, it's all invisible to people who don't believe or comprehend it. I totally hear you guys. > > > 2. I wish people would understand that I have had an enormous weight on me for my entire life and every effort I make in life is with that huge weight added for resistance. > > Hell yeah, ! I've felt this frustration my whole life that people don't get it what I've overcome and still live with. It especially enrages me when I feel like I'm lifting 100 lbs. (with an invisible 500 stacked on so I've really got 600) and some person who's had all the advantages is lifting 150 lbs. and telling me " work harder...put your back into it, if I can do it you can do it! " and " Oh here maybe if you read this book about how to be happy you'll stop psyching yourself out and be able to lift 150 with ease like me! " > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 26, 2010 Report Share Posted November 26, 2010 & , There's so much extra weight because, not only do we not have the standard *help* that parents are supposed to give, we also have extra weight instead, as our parents try to actively prevent us from success and happiness. And of course, it's all invisible to people who don't believe or comprehend it. I totally hear you guys. > > > 2. I wish people would understand that I have had an enormous weight on me for my entire life and every effort I make in life is with that huge weight added for resistance. > > Hell yeah, ! I've felt this frustration my whole life that people don't get it what I've overcome and still live with. It especially enrages me when I feel like I'm lifting 100 lbs. (with an invisible 500 stacked on so I've really got 600) and some person who's had all the advantages is lifting 150 lbs. and telling me " work harder...put your back into it, if I can do it you can do it! " and " Oh here maybe if you read this book about how to be happy you'll stop psyching yourself out and be able to lift 150 with ease like me! " > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 26, 2010 Report Share Posted November 26, 2010 & , There's so much extra weight because, not only do we not have the standard *help* that parents are supposed to give, we also have extra weight instead, as our parents try to actively prevent us from success and happiness. And of course, it's all invisible to people who don't believe or comprehend it. I totally hear you guys. > > > 2. I wish people would understand that I have had an enormous weight on me for my entire life and every effort I make in life is with that huge weight added for resistance. > > Hell yeah, ! I've felt this frustration my whole life that people don't get it what I've overcome and still live with. It especially enrages me when I feel like I'm lifting 100 lbs. (with an invisible 500 stacked on so I've really got 600) and some person who's had all the advantages is lifting 150 lbs. and telling me " work harder...put your back into it, if I can do it you can do it! " and " Oh here maybe if you read this book about how to be happy you'll stop psyching yourself out and be able to lift 150 with ease like me! " > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 28, 2010 Report Share Posted November 28, 2010 How does it feel - it feels as though she has taken an invisible knife and cut strips of my soul. And that she has twisted my thinking in such a way, that I even do it to myself. And that I can't stop doing that, until I can learn to see that knife that to others just seems as insubstantial as FOG. What do I want people to understand? Just because you can't see the hurt, doesn't mean that it is not there or any less. I am not exaggerating or making things up, I am just trying to tell you how I feel. Stop trying to tell me how I should feel. To those who ignore - you need to learn that when something is wrong, screw social conventions and what you think " should " be happening or how things " should " be. Put yourself in that child's shoes and try to understand how it must be like. Then think about it like this, if this was me, what would I want someone to do? And then try doing that. > > > > > > I was thinking of writing a guest post on a friend's private blog about what it's like to have a parent with BPD. I was wondering if any of you would like to contribute your thoughts. I would like to list some quotes at the end of the article. I would quote you anonymously or by the first two letters of your screen name. If you would like to help, here's what I'm looking for: > > > > In three lines or less (on this yahoo text box), answer one of the following questions. a) How does it feel to have a parent with BPD? b)What do you wish other people understood about what it's like to live with someone who has BPD? c)What did you need from other adults who were aware that something wasn't " right " about your parent with BPD? > > > > Thank you for contributing. > > > > KT > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 28, 2010 Report Share Posted November 28, 2010 How does it feel - it feels as though she has taken an invisible knife and cut strips of my soul. And that she has twisted my thinking in such a way, that I even do it to myself. And that I can't stop doing that, until I can learn to see that knife that to others just seems as insubstantial as FOG. What do I want people to understand? Just because you can't see the hurt, doesn't mean that it is not there or any less. I am not exaggerating or making things up, I am just trying to tell you how I feel. Stop trying to tell me how I should feel. To those who ignore - you need to learn that when something is wrong, screw social conventions and what you think " should " be happening or how things " should " be. Put yourself in that child's shoes and try to understand how it must be like. Then think about it like this, if this was me, what would I want someone to do? And then try doing that. > > > > > > I was thinking of writing a guest post on a friend's private blog about what it's like to have a parent with BPD. I was wondering if any of you would like to contribute your thoughts. I would like to list some quotes at the end of the article. I would quote you anonymously or by the first two letters of your screen name. If you would like to help, here's what I'm looking for: > > > > In three lines or less (on this yahoo text box), answer one of the following questions. a) How does it feel to have a parent with BPD? b)What do you wish other people understood about what it's like to live with someone who has BPD? c)What did you need from other adults who were aware that something wasn't " right " about your parent with BPD? > > > > Thank you for contributing. > > > > KT > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 28, 2010 Report Share Posted November 28, 2010 How does it feel - it feels as though she has taken an invisible knife and cut strips of my soul. And that she has twisted my thinking in such a way, that I even do it to myself. And that I can't stop doing that, until I can learn to see that knife that to others just seems as insubstantial as FOG. What do I want people to understand? Just because you can't see the hurt, doesn't mean that it is not there or any less. I am not exaggerating or making things up, I am just trying to tell you how I feel. Stop trying to tell me how I should feel. To those who ignore - you need to learn that when something is wrong, screw social conventions and what you think " should " be happening or how things " should " be. Put yourself in that child's shoes and try to understand how it must be like. Then think about it like this, if this was me, what would I want someone to do? And then try doing that. > > > > > > I was thinking of writing a guest post on a friend's private blog about what it's like to have a parent with BPD. I was wondering if any of you would like to contribute your thoughts. I would like to list some quotes at the end of the article. I would quote you anonymously or by the first two letters of your screen name. If you would like to help, here's what I'm looking for: > > > > In three lines or less (on this yahoo text box), answer one of the following questions. a) How does it feel to have a parent with BPD? b)What do you wish other people understood about what it's like to live with someone who has BPD? c)What did you need from other adults who were aware that something wasn't " right " about your parent with BPD? > > > > Thank you for contributing. > > > > KT > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 28, 2010 Report Share Posted November 28, 2010 a) How does it feel to have a parent with BPD? I feel like I had to be my mother's mother, responsible for her well-being, but somehow, I was never supposed to become an adult and make decisions for myself. b)What do you wish other people understood about what it's like to live with someone who has BPD? It is terribly exhausting. Forgive the Star Trek reference, but your entire life is a Kobyashi Maru, a no-win situation. c)What did you need from other adults who were aware that something wasn't " right " about your parent with BPD? I think if you describe someone you are dating as crazy or neurotic, you should break up with them, quickly! For God's sake don't marry them and sure as hell, don't have children with them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 28, 2010 Report Share Posted November 28, 2010 a) How does it feel to have a parent with BPD? I feel like I had to be my mother's mother, responsible for her well-being, but somehow, I was never supposed to become an adult and make decisions for myself. b)What do you wish other people understood about what it's like to live with someone who has BPD? It is terribly exhausting. Forgive the Star Trek reference, but your entire life is a Kobyashi Maru, a no-win situation. c)What did you need from other adults who were aware that something wasn't " right " about your parent with BPD? I think if you describe someone you are dating as crazy or neurotic, you should break up with them, quickly! For God's sake don't marry them and sure as hell, don't have children with them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 28, 2010 Report Share Posted November 28, 2010 a) How does it feel to have a parent with BPD? I feel like I had to be my mother's mother, responsible for her well-being, but somehow, I was never supposed to become an adult and make decisions for myself. b)What do you wish other people understood about what it's like to live with someone who has BPD? It is terribly exhausting. Forgive the Star Trek reference, but your entire life is a Kobyashi Maru, a no-win situation. c)What did you need from other adults who were aware that something wasn't " right " about your parent with BPD? I think if you describe someone you are dating as crazy or neurotic, you should break up with them, quickly! For God's sake don't marry them and sure as hell, don't have children with them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 28, 2010 Report Share Posted November 28, 2010 > I think if you describe someone you are dating as crazy or neurotic, you should break up with them, quickly! For God's sake don't marry them and sure as hell, don't have children with them! > HERE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -Jade Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 28, 2010 Report Share Posted November 28, 2010 > I think if you describe someone you are dating as crazy or neurotic, you should break up with them, quickly! For God's sake don't marry them and sure as hell, don't have children with them! > HERE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -Jade Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 29, 2010 Report Share Posted November 29, 2010 KT Question: what is it like living w/a parent who is BPD? In 3 lines or less: It is a constant feeling that you are worthless, you'll never meet their expectations, and you are not loved, just tolerated. Laurie In a message dated 11/28/2010 4:40:01 A.M. Eastern Standard Time, tala_aislin@... writes: How does it feel - it feels as though she has taken an invisible knife and cut strips of my soul. And that she has twisted my thinking in such a way, that I even do it to myself. And that I can't stop doing that, until I can learn to see that knife that to others just seems as insubstantial as FOG. What do I want people to understand? Just because you can't see the hurt, doesn't mean that it is not there or any less. I am not exaggerating or making things up, I am just trying to tell you how I feel. Stop trying to tell me how I should feel. To those who ignore - you need to learn that when something is wrong, screw social conventions and what you think " should " be happening or how things " should " be. Put yourself in that child's shoes and try to understand how it must be like. Then think about it like this, if this was me, what would I want someone to do? And then try doing that. > > > > > > I was thinking of writing a guest post on a friend's private blog about what it's like to have a parent with BPD. I was wondering if any of you would like to contribute your thoughts. I would like to list some quotes at the end of the article. I would quote you anonymously or by the first two letters of your screen name. If you would like to help, here's what I'm looking for: > > > > In three lines or less (on this yahoo text box), answer one of the following questions. a) How does it feel to have a parent with BPD? b)What do you wish other people understood about what it's like to live with someone who has BPD? c)What did you need from other adults who were aware that something wasn't " right " about your parent with BPD? > > > > Thank you for contributing. > > > > KT > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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