Re: Re: BPD's and pathological lying

[Guest guest]

yeah...my therapist says they end up fulfilling their own prophecy for being

abandoned. It really does break my heart for them.

Re: Apparently, I " need help "

>

>

>

>

> I d like to share something for you to consider.

>

> I haven t read your previous posts about your mom s blow ups, so I m

> coming in at the middle. However, I m assuming that she is a nada,

that

> is a BP.

>

> That being the case, you should consider this: BP s lie. They

> gaslight, re invent the past, hear conversations as they want them to

> be, not as they are.

>

> All these things you have heard of Nada s T, telling her she is a

> victim, that her family is sicker than she is so she should ignore

them,

> pitting her against them, again, I m assuming that you have heard

these

> things only from nada, or from someone to whom nada has spoken. I

> further assume that you have NOT heard any of them directly from the

T.

>

> My own nada told me at various times that her T said she didn t need

to

> be in therapy, her psychiatrist had another woman in the office with

her

> while she talked, and the woman told her she was a very wise woman,

who

> helped other people more than they helped her, that it was right for

> her to hate her mother. I could go on with this list, but the main

> point about it is that not One of these things were true.

>

> I DID in fact meet with her T , with her, and alone, when she refused

to

> show up for a family therapy session. Nada very frequently told me,

and

> others, things her T had said that NO professional counselor would

ever

> say, and things that her Dr said that no Dr would ever tell a patient.

> The bottom line is that she was gaslighting, and telling the story

that

> lined up with what she wanted to do and to believe.

>

> I can t tell you for certain that is what your nada is doing, but just

> the brief story you shared makes me highly suspicious that this is the

> case. They love to say things that deflect anger or hurt feelings away

> from them, because , of course, nothing is ever their fault.

>

> My rule of thumb with a BP, is that I never, ever believe what they

say

> unless it is confirmed and verified by another person who is NOT a

> flying monkey!

>

> And just to help you out,

>

> CSAT is Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist

> NCC is National Certified Counselor

>

> Just sharing some knowledge and experience with you, not trying to

tell

> you what to do, by any means. You have a BP in your life, it is a

> tough thing.

>

> Good luck to you.

>

> Doug

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

yeah...my therapist says they end up fulfilling their own prophecy for being

abandoned. It really does break my heart for them.

Re: Apparently, I " need help "

>

>

>

>

> I d like to share something for you to consider.

>

> I haven t read your previous posts about your mom s blow ups, so I m

> coming in at the middle. However, I m assuming that she is a nada,

that

> is a BP.

>

> That being the case, you should consider this: BP s lie. They

> gaslight, re invent the past, hear conversations as they want them to

> be, not as they are.

>

> All these things you have heard of Nada s T, telling her she is a

> victim, that her family is sicker than she is so she should ignore

them,

> pitting her against them, again, I m assuming that you have heard

these

> things only from nada, or from someone to whom nada has spoken. I

> further assume that you have NOT heard any of them directly from the

T.

>

> My own nada told me at various times that her T said she didn t need

to

> be in therapy, her psychiatrist had another woman in the office with

her

> while she talked, and the woman told her she was a very wise woman,

who

> helped other people more than they helped her, that it was right for

> her to hate her mother. I could go on with this list, but the main

> point about it is that not One of these things were true.

>

> I DID in fact meet with her T , with her, and alone, when she refused

to

> show up for a family therapy session. Nada very frequently told me,

and

> others, things her T had said that NO professional counselor would

ever

> say, and things that her Dr said that no Dr would ever tell a patient.

> The bottom line is that she was gaslighting, and telling the story

that

> lined up with what she wanted to do and to believe.

>

> I can t tell you for certain that is what your nada is doing, but just

> the brief story you shared makes me highly suspicious that this is the

> case. They love to say things that deflect anger or hurt feelings away

> from them, because , of course, nothing is ever their fault.

>

> My rule of thumb with a BP, is that I never, ever believe what they

say

> unless it is confirmed and verified by another person who is NOT a

> flying monkey!

>

> And just to help you out,

>

> CSAT is Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist

> NCC is National Certified Counselor

>

> Just sharing some knowledge and experience with you, not trying to

tell

> you what to do, by any means. You have a BP in your life, it is a

> tough thing.

>

> Good luck to you.

>

> Doug

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

My mother always " misconstrued " things. She always told me that the doctor told

her she had 6 months to live. I don't know why that was her pat answer, but it

always was. Or the doctor was surprised she was still alive. That kind of

thing. My dad would just roll his eyes and never stand up to her.

Re: Apparently, I " need help "

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > I d like to share something for you to consider.

> >

> > I haven t read your previous posts about your mom s blow ups, so I m

> > coming in at the middle. However, I m assuming that she is a nada,

> that

> > is a BP.

> >

> > That being the case, you should consider this: BP s lie. They

> > gaslight, re invent the past, hear conversations as they want them to

> > be, not as they are.

> >

> > All these things you have heard of Nada s T, telling her she is a

> > victim, that her family is sicker than she is so she should ignore

> them,

> > pitting her against them, again, I m assuming that you have heard

> these

> > things only from nada, or from someone to whom nada has spoken. I

> > further assume that you have NOT heard any of them directly from the

> T.

> >

> > My own nada told me at various times that her T said she didn t need

> to

> > be in therapy, her psychiatrist had another woman in the office with

> her

> > while she talked, and the woman told her she was a very wise woman,

> who

> > helped other people more than they helped her, that it was right for

> > her to hate her mother. I could go on with this list, but the main

> > point about it is that not One of these things were true.

> >

> > I DID in fact meet with her T , with her, and alone, when she refused

> to

> > show up for a family therapy session. Nada very frequently told me,

> and

> > others, things her T had said that NO professional counselor would

> ever

> > say, and things that her Dr said that no Dr would ever tell a patient.

> > The bottom line is that she was gaslighting, and telling the story

> that

> > lined up with what she wanted to do and to believe.

> >

> > I can t tell you for certain that is what your nada is doing, but just

> > the brief story you shared makes me highly suspicious that this is the

> > case. They love to say things that deflect anger or hurt feelings away

> > from them, because , of course, nothing is ever their fault.

> >

> > My rule of thumb with a BP, is that I never, ever believe what they

> say

> > unless it is confirmed and verified by another person who is NOT a

> > flying monkey!

> >

> > And just to help you out,

> >

> > CSAT is Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist

> > NCC is National Certified Counselor

> >

> > Just sharing some knowledge and experience with you, not trying to

> tell

> > you what to do, by any means. You have a BP in your life, it is a

> > tough thing.

> >

> > Good luck to you.

> >

> > Doug

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >