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,

Sorry to hear you are having problems being sick. I am sure this will pass.

Regarding your midwife, can you go back to her when things with you and the

pregnancy have settled? It's important to be comfortable with the person that

will help bring your baby into this world. Maybe once you arent as sick as you

are now, and things are on a more even keel, then you can go back to your

midwife. Your doctor is just being careful, which is a good thing.

I hope things get better for you soon. Take care!

Marcy Wallis

edd 12/08/02

Baby Boy!!!

Mom to a beautiful 8 yr old daughter (PRE WLS)

hi

Just thought I'd send everyone a little note to say Hi! I hope you

are all doing well.

I was at my doctors office for three hours yesterday. I got

dehydrated and had to sit with an IV. I am thrilled to be pregnant

(Mike and I heard the heartbeat today) but I have been so sick, I am

pretty sure it should be called all day sickness. I even wake up at

2, 4 and 5 am to throw up! I am only 8 weeks and I hope this doesn't

go on a whole lot longer. I have lost 4 more pounds in 3 weeks My dr.

says it is ok, but they are putting me in a high rish group so I have

to give up my midwife ( I love her) and I don't really like the dr.

Stamm

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> Hello Everyone. I am a newcomer. I had open Gastric Bypass On May 3 of this

year. It is now 5 1/2 months later and I went from 274 to 175, and still losing

but not fast like I was. I remarried last year and my husband and I are wanting

to have a baby. I am 34 and not getting any younger, so Im ready now. Is there

anyone out there who got pregnant 6-9 months after surgery that has had trouble?

Is there any advice any of you wonderful women could give me as far as the

health of the baby and myself? IS there anyone who would advise NOT to do this

at this point? I have done absolutely wonderful with this surgery. I have no

problems all my bloodwork is perfect, and I NEVER get sick.(THANK YOU GOD!!)I

have had some wierd things going on with my period since surgery. Sorry in

avance for the gross details, but I'm clueless what is going on with my

body.............I have had strange periods since surgery, and inbetween I keep

having a dark brown tint when i wipe MOST of the time. It has been going on for

two weeks now, everyday. It is not heavy enough to wear a pad or anything just

there when wiping. What is this?? Am I even ovulating to get pregnant with

this going on? Someone help if you can...

Thank you so much

Rhonda

>

> Date: 2002/10/18 Fri PM 05:37:19 EDT

> To: <OSSG-pregnant >

> Subject: Re: hi

>

>

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> Hello Everyone. I am a newcomer. I had open Gastric Bypass On May 3 of this

year. It is now 5 1/2 months later and I went from 274 to 175, and still losing

but not fast like I was. I remarried last year and my husband and I are wanting

to have a baby. I am 34 and not getting any younger, so Im ready now. Is there

anyone out there who got pregnant 6-9 months after surgery that has had trouble?

Is there any advice any of you wonderful women could give me as far as the

health of the baby and myself? IS there anyone who would advise NOT to do this

at this point? I have done absolutely wonderful with this surgery. I have no

problems all my bloodwork is perfect, and I NEVER get sick.(THANK YOU GOD!!)I

have had some wierd things going on with my period since surgery. Sorry in

avance for the gross details, but I'm clueless what is going on with my

body.............I have had strange periods since surgery, and inbetween I keep

having a dark brown tint when i wipe MOST of the time. It has been going on for

two weeks now, everyday. It is not heavy enough to wear a pad or anything just

there when wiping. What is this?? Am I even ovulating to get pregnant with

this going on? Someone help if you can...

Thank you so much

Rhonda

>

> Date: 2002/10/18 Fri PM 05:37:19 EDT

> To: <OSSG-pregnant >

> Subject: Re: hi

>

>

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> Hello Everyone. I am a newcomer. I had open Gastric Bypass On May 3 of this

year. It is now 5 1/2 months later and I went from 274 to 175, and still losing

but not fast like I was. I remarried last year and my husband and I are wanting

to have a baby. I am 34 and not getting any younger, so Im ready now. Is there

anyone out there who got pregnant 6-9 months after surgery that has had trouble?

Is there any advice any of you wonderful women could give me as far as the

health of the baby and myself? IS there anyone who would advise NOT to do this

at this point? I have done absolutely wonderful with this surgery. I have no

problems all my bloodwork is perfect, and I NEVER get sick.(THANK YOU GOD!!)I

have had some wierd things going on with my period since surgery. Sorry in

avance for the gross details, but I'm clueless what is going on with my

body.............I have had strange periods since surgery, and inbetween I keep

having a dark brown tint when i wipe MOST of the time. It has been going on for

two weeks now, everyday. It is not heavy enough to wear a pad or anything just

there when wiping. What is this?? Am I even ovulating to get pregnant with

this going on? Someone help if you can...

Thank you so much

Rhonda

>

> Date: 2002/10/18 Fri PM 05:37:19 EDT

> To: <OSSG-pregnant >

> Subject: Re: hi

>

>

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  • 1 year later...
Guest guest

Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He went in

for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer is very

aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad?? They

are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to cure

his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then? Rather

than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to know.

One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

anyway?

I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that all

of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death. My

Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't get

all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am with

him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not to tell

him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is that I

can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell him.

After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped to

make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?) tube

out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go in

there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

going home.

They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I just

feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him to

come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

find out answers?

Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

Please feel free to email me.

Lynette

lkfraley@...

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Lynette,

Hang in there. I've been where your dad has been and although the

news is usually bad in the long run, I think it'll get better before

it gets worse, and there is always the possibility, even with stage

IV cancer (stage IV is cancer that has metastisized, or spread away

from the primary tumor to other parts of the body), that he'll be

cured. So first and foremost, keep up the hope. I had my operation

at the beginning of February (found out I had cancer on my 40th

birthday, actually), spent about 6 days in the hospital, and was out

for no more than 7 days before I developed a leak, absess, and

infection, so I spent another 7 days in, and went home with a drain

in my backside. My kids called it my poopstick, which my wife and I

still laugh about. It sounds like your dad has some other problems -

it may take some time for him to get over them, but he will - the

surgery he had is pretty tough stuff; from what you've said, it

sounds like most of his problems are surgery related, and not related

to another systemic illness. That's good news. When he is able, do

what you can to get him up out of bed as often as possible - the

more he is up (again, when he is able), the less likely it is that he

will get in bad shape again and the sooner he will feel better. My

wife is a nurse who worked in a post surgery floor - she had me up

out of bed the morning after surgery - that's how strongly she felt

about it.

I've been doing chemo ever since, and although the side effects

can be really irritating, I have to say that I have more energy now,

about 4 months into chemo, than I have since before the surgery. To

boot, I'm not even sure that the cancer is any better now than it was

before - that's why I say that it'll get better for him.

What the docs say, I think, is true - without any treatment, the

disease will usually claim life in 6-9 months.

The next couple of months are going to be tough for him and you,

so I think what you can do is be as supportive (read upbeat) as

possible without being too feel-sorry for him (I can't remember the

right word for it). He will probably go through a time where he will

be really mad about the whole thing and really emotional - it takes

a couple of months to come to grips with the reality of the

situation - just be there for him and listen to him. It will take

about 4-5 weeks for him to recover from surgery - until then, he will

be weak and pretty tired. After that, when chemo starts, there will

be good and bad days. The days during and 3-4 days after chemo are

usually the worse, and will involve fatigue and maybe some nausea and

diarrea and maybe some other minor, but nevertheless irritating

stuff, like altered taste. After that though, most people get a full

week-10 days of feeling pretty good. Many aren't phased by the chemo

at all. Finally, depending on what they cut out, GI stuff might be a

problem, because it takes the colon/rectum about a year to get used

to not having everything there anymore. For example, I have

incontinence from time to time. Other people have runs or

constipation. Either way, the docs can give him medicine to help out.

Hope this helps - our prayers will be with you and your dad - if

you have any other questions or anything, don't hesitate to post or

send an email off line. HOpe I didn't babble on too much - if I did,

I apologize.

Joe

> Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

> today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

> My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

> just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He went

in

> for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

> remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

> removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

> the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer is

very

> aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

> area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

> him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad?? They

> are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

> would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to cure

> his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

> this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

> medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then? Rather

> than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

> estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to know.

> One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

> and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

> they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

> anyway?

> I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that all

> of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death. My

> Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't get

> all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

> chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

> live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

> breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am with

> him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not to

tell

> him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is

that I

> can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell him.

> After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped to

> make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?) tube

> out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

> digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

> kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go in

> there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

> supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

> have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

> there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

> going home.

> They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

> they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I just

> feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him to

> come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

> losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

> find out answers?

> Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

> cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

> Please feel free to email me.

>

> Lynette

> lkfraley@y...

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Guest guest

Lynette:

I am sorry for everything that you are having to go through. I feel

for you completely I am 28 and my father was Dx. with Stage IV

cancer with mets to the liver almost a year ago. He has just

recently had some complications but has had a great year and we hope

many many more. Keep praying and reading this board -- It is a

wealth of great information.

Kristi

>

> > Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

> > today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

> > My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

> > just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He

went

> in

> > for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

> > remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

> > removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

> > the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer

is

> very

> > aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

> > area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

> > him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad??

They

> > are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

> > would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to

cure

> > his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

> > this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

> > medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then?

Rather

> > than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

> > estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to

know.

> > One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

> > and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

> > they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

> > anyway?

> > I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that

all

> > of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death.

My

> > Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't

get

> > all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

> > chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

> > live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

> > breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am

with

> > him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not

to

> tell

> > him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is

> that I

> > can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell

him.

> > After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped

to

> > make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?)

tube

> > out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

> > digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

> > kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go

in

> > there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

> > supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

> > have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

> > there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

> > going home.

> > They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

> > they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I

just

> > feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him

to

> > come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

> > losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

> > find out answers?

> > Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

> > cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

> > Please feel free to email me.

> >

> > Lynette

> > lkfraley@y...

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Guest guest

Lynette:

I am sorry for everything that you are having to go through. I feel

for you completely I am 28 and my father was Dx. with Stage IV

cancer with mets to the liver almost a year ago. He has just

recently had some complications but has had a great year and we hope

many many more. Keep praying and reading this board -- It is a

wealth of great information.

Kristi

>

> > Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

> > today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

> > My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

> > just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He

went

> in

> > for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

> > remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

> > removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

> > the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer

is

> very

> > aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

> > area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

> > him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad??

They

> > are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

> > would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to

cure

> > his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

> > this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

> > medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then?

Rather

> > than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

> > estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to

know.

> > One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

> > and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

> > they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

> > anyway?

> > I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that

all

> > of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death.

My

> > Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't

get

> > all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

> > chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

> > live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

> > breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am

with

> > him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not

to

> tell

> > him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is

> that I

> > can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell

him.

> > After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped

to

> > make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?)

tube

> > out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

> > digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

> > kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go

in

> > there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

> > supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

> > have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

> > there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

> > going home.

> > They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

> > they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I

just

> > feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him

to

> > come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

> > losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

> > find out answers?

> > Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

> > cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

> > Please feel free to email me.

> >

> > Lynette

> > lkfraley@y...

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Guest guest

Lynette:

I am sorry for everything that you are having to go through. I feel

for you completely I am 28 and my father was Dx. with Stage IV

cancer with mets to the liver almost a year ago. He has just

recently had some complications but has had a great year and we hope

many many more. Keep praying and reading this board -- It is a

wealth of great information.

Kristi

>

> > Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

> > today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

> > My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

> > just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He

went

> in

> > for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

> > remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

> > removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

> > the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer

is

> very

> > aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

> > area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

> > him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad??

They

> > are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

> > would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to

cure

> > his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

> > this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

> > medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then?

Rather

> > than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

> > estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to

know.

> > One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

> > and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

> > they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

> > anyway?

> > I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that

all

> > of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death.

My

> > Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't

get

> > all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

> > chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

> > live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

> > breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am

with

> > him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not

to

> tell

> > him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is

> that I

> > can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell

him.

> > After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped

to

> > make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?)

tube

> > out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

> > digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

> > kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go

in

> > there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

> > supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

> > have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

> > there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

> > going home.

> > They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

> > they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I

just

> > feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him

to

> > come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

> > losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

> > find out answers?

> > Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

> > cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

> > Please feel free to email me.

> >

> > Lynette

> > lkfraley@y...

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Guest guest

Lynette;

First let me offer my sympathy to you and your father for having to

go through this ordeal. I, too, am a Stage IV colon cancer victim

currently undergoing chemotherapy with good results.

When I first met with my oncologist he told me that chemo for stage

IV CC was basically intended to extend life for a modest time and

improve the quality of life of the patient for as long as possible.

He also told me, quite frankly, that the CC would be terminal.

After 12 rounds of chemo, we are now expecting partial or full

remission so don't give up hope.

The good news in your message is that the CC your father has is very

aggressive. The more aggressive the cancer, the more likely chemo

will work well. The chemo agents attack fast growing cells and

aggressive CC is fast growing.

The bottom line here is that your father should go to a top rated

cancer center as soon as he is able. There are some really

interesting advances in CC treatment in the last year and usually

the non-specialist is not up to date on the options. Please, please

seek the advice of a respected oncologist ASAP.

Lots of love and prayers to you and your dad.

-joe- (the other Joe)

> Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

> today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

> My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

> just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He went

in

> for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

> remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

> removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

> the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer is

very

> aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

> area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

> him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad??

They

> are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

> would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to cure

> his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

> this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

> medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then? Rather

> than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

> estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to

know.

> One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

> and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

> they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

> anyway?

> I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that all

> of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death. My

> Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't

get

> all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

> chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

> live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

> breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am with

> him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not to

tell

> him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is

that I

> can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell

him.

> After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped to

> make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?) tube

> out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

> digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

> kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go in

> there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

> supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

> have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

> there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

> going home.

> They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

> they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I just

> feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him to

> come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

> losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

> find out answers?

> Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

> cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

> Please feel free to email me.

>

> Lynette

> lkfraley@y...

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Guest guest

Lynette;

First let me offer my sympathy to you and your father for having to

go through this ordeal. I, too, am a Stage IV colon cancer victim

currently undergoing chemotherapy with good results.

When I first met with my oncologist he told me that chemo for stage

IV CC was basically intended to extend life for a modest time and

improve the quality of life of the patient for as long as possible.

He also told me, quite frankly, that the CC would be terminal.

After 12 rounds of chemo, we are now expecting partial or full

remission so don't give up hope.

The good news in your message is that the CC your father has is very

aggressive. The more aggressive the cancer, the more likely chemo

will work well. The chemo agents attack fast growing cells and

aggressive CC is fast growing.

The bottom line here is that your father should go to a top rated

cancer center as soon as he is able. There are some really

interesting advances in CC treatment in the last year and usually

the non-specialist is not up to date on the options. Please, please

seek the advice of a respected oncologist ASAP.

Lots of love and prayers to you and your dad.

-joe- (the other Joe)

> Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

> today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

> My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

> just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He went

in

> for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

> remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

> removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

> the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer is

very

> aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

> area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

> him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad??

They

> are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

> would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to cure

> his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

> this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

> medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then? Rather

> than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

> estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to

know.

> One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

> and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

> they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

> anyway?

> I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that all

> of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death. My

> Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't

get

> all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

> chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

> live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

> breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am with

> him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not to

tell

> him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is

that I

> can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell

him.

> After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped to

> make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?) tube

> out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

> digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

> kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go in

> there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

> supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

> have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

> there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

> going home.

> They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

> they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I just

> feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him to

> come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

> losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

> find out answers?

> Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

> cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

> Please feel free to email me.

>

> Lynette

> lkfraley@y...

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Share on other sites

Guest guest

Hi Lynette -

My heart goes out to you. It is truely horrible to watch a loved one

go through this. I too just found this group today. My husband was

diagnosed with stage 3 colorectal cancer in 4/2003. In the past

year, he's been through a lot (8 hr surgery, temporary ileostomy, 7

months chemo, 28 days radiation, life threatening dehydration

episodes, ileostomy take down surgery, and reoccurring drug resistant

C diff infection). He's finished with his treatments for now and is

rebuilding his strength.

For your situation, the most immediate issue is getting your father

properly cared for in the hospital and having your questions

answered. Things that worked for me.....

A) Call his surgeon or other personal physicans. Ask to have them

review his case and meet with you. Sometimes a resident or physican-

in-training is in charge of hospital patients. In our hospital, the

hospital physicians have less experience than our surgeon. (I did

this when my husband's Cdiff infection had been undiagnosed and he

was continuing to suffer untreated. The results were almost

instantaneous - CT scan, colonoscopy, diagnosis, and treatment.)

B) Call the complaint desk at the hospital. (I did this after my

husband was allowed to get severely dehydrated SEVERAL times while in

the hospital. It turns out that his IV rate was too low for his

fluid output rate. Although they collected both his input and output

data, they were not looking at it. Now that I think of it, you may

want to make sure that father's weight loss isn't due to dehydration.)

C) Try to have someone (family, friend, etc.) with him always. They

are there to help him, get help (chase down dr and/or nurses), get

answers, etc. Remember the squeaky wheel adage .... Also, have them

bring something to do while your father rests.

D) If you find a nurse who does an exceptional job at caring for your

father and explaining things to you, ask to have them assigned to

your father for the rest of his stay. (We did this via the complaint

desk.)

As for his treatment plan, do some research online if you have a

chance. I went to cancer.gov for more information about treatment

options. You can also check into clinic trials, which provide a

potential alternative to conventional treatments.

I know how hard it is - especially in the beginning. After a while,

I became numb - almost zombie like. (I guess it's hard to sustain

that intense level of emotions.) I found that I was more effective

at helping him and getting others to help him once the resigned

acceptance feeling settled in. I don't know if any of this will help

you, but I do feel for you and your family.

Thinking of you...

> Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

> today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

> My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

> just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He went

in

> for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

> remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

> removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

> the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer is

very

> aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

> area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

> him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad?? They

> are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

> would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to cure

> his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

> this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

> medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then? Rather

> than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

> estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to know.

> One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

> and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

> they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

> anyway?

> I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that all

> of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death. My

> Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't get

> all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

> chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

> live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

> breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am with

> him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not to

tell

> him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is

that I

> can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell him.

> After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped to

> make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?) tube

> out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

> digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

> kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go in

> there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

> supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

> have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

> there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

> going home.

> They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

> they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I just

> feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him to

> come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

> losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

> find out answers?

> Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

> cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

> Please feel free to email me.

>

> Lynette

> lkfraley@y...

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Share on other sites

Guest guest

Hi Lynette -

My heart goes out to you. It is truely horrible to watch a loved one

go through this. I too just found this group today. My husband was

diagnosed with stage 3 colorectal cancer in 4/2003. In the past

year, he's been through a lot (8 hr surgery, temporary ileostomy, 7

months chemo, 28 days radiation, life threatening dehydration

episodes, ileostomy take down surgery, and reoccurring drug resistant

C diff infection). He's finished with his treatments for now and is

rebuilding his strength.

For your situation, the most immediate issue is getting your father

properly cared for in the hospital and having your questions

answered. Things that worked for me.....

A) Call his surgeon or other personal physicans. Ask to have them

review his case and meet with you. Sometimes a resident or physican-

in-training is in charge of hospital patients. In our hospital, the

hospital physicians have less experience than our surgeon. (I did

this when my husband's Cdiff infection had been undiagnosed and he

was continuing to suffer untreated. The results were almost

instantaneous - CT scan, colonoscopy, diagnosis, and treatment.)

B) Call the complaint desk at the hospital. (I did this after my

husband was allowed to get severely dehydrated SEVERAL times while in

the hospital. It turns out that his IV rate was too low for his

fluid output rate. Although they collected both his input and output

data, they were not looking at it. Now that I think of it, you may

want to make sure that father's weight loss isn't due to dehydration.)

C) Try to have someone (family, friend, etc.) with him always. They

are there to help him, get help (chase down dr and/or nurses), get

answers, etc. Remember the squeaky wheel adage .... Also, have them

bring something to do while your father rests.

D) If you find a nurse who does an exceptional job at caring for your

father and explaining things to you, ask to have them assigned to

your father for the rest of his stay. (We did this via the complaint

desk.)

As for his treatment plan, do some research online if you have a

chance. I went to cancer.gov for more information about treatment

options. You can also check into clinic trials, which provide a

potential alternative to conventional treatments.

I know how hard it is - especially in the beginning. After a while,

I became numb - almost zombie like. (I guess it's hard to sustain

that intense level of emotions.) I found that I was more effective

at helping him and getting others to help him once the resigned

acceptance feeling settled in. I don't know if any of this will help

you, but I do feel for you and your family.

Thinking of you...

> Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

> today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

> My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

> just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He went

in

> for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

> remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

> removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

> the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer is

very

> aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

> area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

> him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad?? They

> are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

> would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to cure

> his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

> this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

> medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then? Rather

> than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

> estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to know.

> One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

> and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

> they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

> anyway?

> I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that all

> of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death. My

> Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't get

> all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

> chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

> live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

> breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am with

> him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not to

tell

> him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is

that I

> can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell him.

> After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped to

> make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?) tube

> out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

> digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

> kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go in

> there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

> supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

> have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

> there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

> going home.

> They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

> they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I just

> feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him to

> come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

> losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

> find out answers?

> Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

> cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

> Please feel free to email me.

>

> Lynette

> lkfraley@y...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest guest

Hi Lynette -

My heart goes out to you. It is truely horrible to watch a loved one

go through this. I too just found this group today. My husband was

diagnosed with stage 3 colorectal cancer in 4/2003. In the past

year, he's been through a lot (8 hr surgery, temporary ileostomy, 7

months chemo, 28 days radiation, life threatening dehydration

episodes, ileostomy take down surgery, and reoccurring drug resistant

C diff infection). He's finished with his treatments for now and is

rebuilding his strength.

For your situation, the most immediate issue is getting your father

properly cared for in the hospital and having your questions

answered. Things that worked for me.....

A) Call his surgeon or other personal physicans. Ask to have them

review his case and meet with you. Sometimes a resident or physican-

in-training is in charge of hospital patients. In our hospital, the

hospital physicians have less experience than our surgeon. (I did

this when my husband's Cdiff infection had been undiagnosed and he

was continuing to suffer untreated. The results were almost

instantaneous - CT scan, colonoscopy, diagnosis, and treatment.)

B) Call the complaint desk at the hospital. (I did this after my

husband was allowed to get severely dehydrated SEVERAL times while in

the hospital. It turns out that his IV rate was too low for his

fluid output rate. Although they collected both his input and output

data, they were not looking at it. Now that I think of it, you may

want to make sure that father's weight loss isn't due to dehydration.)

C) Try to have someone (family, friend, etc.) with him always. They

are there to help him, get help (chase down dr and/or nurses), get

answers, etc. Remember the squeaky wheel adage .... Also, have them

bring something to do while your father rests.

D) If you find a nurse who does an exceptional job at caring for your

father and explaining things to you, ask to have them assigned to

your father for the rest of his stay. (We did this via the complaint

desk.)

As for his treatment plan, do some research online if you have a

chance. I went to cancer.gov for more information about treatment

options. You can also check into clinic trials, which provide a

potential alternative to conventional treatments.

I know how hard it is - especially in the beginning. After a while,

I became numb - almost zombie like. (I guess it's hard to sustain

that intense level of emotions.) I found that I was more effective

at helping him and getting others to help him once the resigned

acceptance feeling settled in. I don't know if any of this will help

you, but I do feel for you and your family.

Thinking of you...

> Hi everyone. My name is Lynette and I just found this group

> today. I am 24 and I live in Ohio.

> My Father who is 67 found out in May that he had colon cancer. I

> just couldn't believe it and I think I am still in shock. He went

in

> for the surgery on June 18th. It was so awful. I can just barely

> remember the words the surgeon said to us. He said they

> removed a very large tumor, but they were not able to get all of

> the cancer. It was a blur after that. It seems that his cancer is

very

> aggressive and that it seems to have spread to his spine/back

> area. This means that there is not much more they can do for

> him. They call it a stage 4 cancer, I guess this is very bad?? They

> are recommending chemotherapy. They said that the chemo

> would not be a form of treatment as there is no treatment to cure

> his cancer, they said it would be mostly for pain control. Does

> this sound right? They said that they could give him oral

> medicines for pain, wouldn't that be a better option then? Rather

> than put him through Chemo? They won't really give us a time

> estimate, which is really bothering me. I feel like I need to know.

> One of his Doctors said 6-9 months. And if Dad takes chemo

> and IF it is successful than he would have 18 months. How can

> they say it is successful when they said that he is going to die

> anyway?

> I just don't understand. I wake up every morning hoping that all

> of this is just a really awful nightmare. I am scared to death. My

> Dad doesn't know everything yet. They told him that they didn't get

> all of the cancer and that he would most likely need

> chemotherapy. He thinks that he is going to take this chemo and

> live a while longer. He doesn't realize he is dying and it is

> breaking my heart. I have to try so hard not to cry when I am with

> him at the hospital. I almost feel like it would be better not to

tell

> him, I think it would be too hard for him to take. All I know is

that I

> can't tell him, and the Doctors don't seem to be trying to tell him.

> After his surgery he got a blod clot in his lungs, which helped to

> make his stay even longer. After 4 days they took his NG (?) tube

> out of his nose. Then he cosntantly vomited everything he

> digested, so they put the tube back in there. Now he has some

> kind of absess/infection going on. I feel like every time I go in

> there to see him something else is wrong. I thought they were

> supposed to take care of you in the hospital?? Did anyone else

> have these kinds of complications? They said he would be in

> there 5-7 days and now it has been two weeks, with no sign of

> going home.

> They put in a central line into his chest about a week ago, well

> they took that out yesterday and put one into his forearm. I just

> feel so frustrated that we can't get any answers and I want him to

> come home. He hasn't ate anything in over two weeks. He is

> losing strength and too much weight too. What do I do? How do I

> find out answers?

> Can anyone share with me their experiences with this awful

> cancer? I really need some support here. Thank You very much.

> Please feel free to email me.

>

> Lynette

> lkfraley@y...

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Share on other sites

Guest guest

Karima -

I wish you the best on your upcoming surgery and treatments. I hope

that you don't have to use any of my suggestions on unresolved care

issues during your hospital stay. Most problems can be resolved

directly with the hospital staff (most of which are overworked and

underappreciated).

Good Luck!

> Dear ,

> Your note to Lynette was so outstanding that I saved a copy for us.

> I am at the beginning of this path with surgery scheduled for July

22nd.

> Thank you,

> karima

>

> -- Re: Hi

>

> Hi Lynette -

>

> My heart goes out to you. It is truely horrible to watch a loved

one

> go through this. I too just found this group today. My husband

was

> diagnosed with stage 3 colorectal cancer in 4/2003. In the past

> year, he's been through a lot (8 hr surgery, temporary ileostomy, 7

> months chemo, 28 days radiation, life threatening dehydration

> episodes, ileostomy take down surgery, and reoccurring drug

resistant

> C diff infection). He's finished with his treatments for now and

is

> rebuilding his strength.

>

> For your situation, the most immediate issue is getting your father

> properly cared for in the hospital and having your questions

> answered. Things that worked for me.....

>

> A) Call his surgeon or other personal physicans. Ask to have them

> review his case and meet with you. Sometimes a resident or

physican-

> in-training is in charge of hospital patients. In our hospital,

the

> hospital physicians have less experience than our surgeon. (I did

> this when my husband's Cdiff infection had been undiagnosed and he

> was continuing to suffer untreated. The results were almost

> instantaneous - CT scan, colonoscopy, diagnosis, and treatment.)

>

> B) Call the complaint desk at the hospital. (I did this after my

> husband was allowed to get severely dehydrated SEVERAL times while

in

> the hospital. It turns out that his IV rate was too low for his

> fluid output rate. Although they collected both his input and

output

> data, they were not looking at it. Now that I think of it, you may

> want to make sure that father's weight loss isn't due to

dehydration.)

>

> C) Try to have someone (family, friend, etc.) with him always.

They

> are there to help him, get help (chase down dr and/or nurses), get

> answers, etc. Remember the squeaky wheel adage .... Also, have

them

> bring something to do while your father rests.

>

> D) If you find a nurse who does an exceptional job at caring for

your

> father and explaining things to you, ask to have them assigned to

> your father for the rest of his stay. (We did this via the

complaint

> desk.)

>

> As for his treatment plan, do some research online if you have a

> chance. I went to cancer.gov for more information about treatment

> options. You can also check into clinic trials, which provide a

> potential alternative to conventional treatments.

>

> I know how hard it is - especially in the beginning. After a

while,

> I became numb - almost zombie like. (I guess it's hard to sustain

> that intense level of emotions.) I found that I was more effective

> at helping him and getting others to help him once the resigned

> acceptance feeling settled in. I don't know if any of this will

help

> you, but I do feel for you and your family.

>

> Thinking of you...

>

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