BPD mother and her therapist

[Guest guest]

First post, new here. I've been trying to search the boards and messages and

reading but I haven't come across anything similar to my situation yet.

I'm pretty sure my mom has BPD or some form of it. But reading through I see a

common thread of those describing their BPD individuals as overbearing and

controlling.

My mother is not a dominating personality. She appears quite the opposite. Her

control is through playing the victim and emotional manipulation. She has all

the symptoms of BPD to a T.

She has been seeing a clinical psychologist for 7 years, right after she left my

dad. She always made my dad look like a horrible person to us growing up and I

hated him for how he treated my mother and subsequently, how he used such harsh

punishments and disciplines on us. Ever since my mom left him and I have seen

them apart, my opinion of our family dynamic has changed. My dad certainly has

his issues, but I am starting to think my mom was the silent manipulator behind

it all growing up. My dad was more the " overbearing controller " but my mom was

operating the controls - make sense?

Anyway, I will try to sum this up. I am not sure whether to believe my mom has a

jacked up therapist or she is twisting the " advice " she is being given to us so

her therapist looks like her protector. In either case, she blew up at my two

brothers this holiday weekend over something so trivial. She took a casual joke,

twisted the words, and blew up in a fit of anger and hysterical tears (happens

frequently). She told them she called her therapist who advised her to force

both of my bothers to leave her premises immediately because they were

" violating her sanctuary of peace " . (One is military and visiting for holidays

and the other is temporarily living with her to finish college). They of course

came to my house to stay because they have no where else to go. (My mother knew

full well where they would go). I called her the next day and told her she went

over the line and she told me to butt out, none of my business.

One week and multiple coachings from her therapist later, this has turned into a

huge ordeal and my mom can't even recall why she got mad in the first place. And

is wanting us to have a family session with her therapist, who I am pretty sure

is very biased against us at this point.

It amazes me how she goes from being loving, doting mother who is thrilled to

have all her children back together to " get out of my house I hate your guts " in

a matter of hours.

All her friends and family have told her she was wrong for her actions but she

is cutting everyone off and clinging to her therapist like a lifeline. You would

think at this point in my life my mother would stop ceasing to amaze me

but....just when I think she may be getting normal, crap like this happens.

It seems like her therapist is pitting her against us...I don't understand.

Aren't they supposed to foster restoration, communication in a family? Why

encourage divisiveness? Sorry for the long post. Her therapist is female, FYI.