Re: Re: A Time of Letting Go (A Poem to Share) :)

[Guest guest]

Very beautiful poem and if I had more skill for writing I could have said it

myself. I hope that you find/found writing to be helpful and therapeutic.

I used to write a lot, but not as much anymore. I used to be an art major

though, and I did a HUGE project for myself that I kept thinking I needed to

do. It is a series of drawings depicting a particular act of abuse my nada

did to me. I gotta tell you... it was AMAZING what drawing it out did for

me! That memory... I would get so upset just THINKING about it, never mind

trying to tell anyone about it. Now... no sweat! I can talk about it.

It's FINALLY in the past.

I couldn't believe how much that helped. I am thinking of doing another

project for my little baby brother. Maybe that will help me to grieve him

too.

Thank you for sharing your wonderful & touching poem.

Mia

>

>

> Wow! letting go! It was a lot easier when I was LC and fada lived in

> another county. We brought him to live with us because we thought he was

> dying. I know now some of that was just the helpless waif. He could have

> lived alone a while longer if he didn't sit around and just feel sorry for

> himself all day. But I am learning even if he lives with us, that I can " let

> go " of a lot of things if I just keep control of my own emotions. Thanks

> Jaie, for the poem.

> Kay

>

> >

> > I would be justified in feeling a victim of her vulgar words

> > I would be right to blame her for the neglect and the pain

> > I would be valid in demonstrating the hatred she shows for me

> > I would be right in calling her wrong

> >

> > I could feel sorry for myself and hold out hope

> > for a mother I always wanted and never had

> > I could feel cheated and wronged by the Universe

> > for the woman who manipulates and hates unless you do her bidding

> >

> > I may be who she raised me to be

> > But if I stay that way, the consequences are all on me

> > I cannot hold hatred and self-loathing in my heart

> > In her wicked ways, she at least taught me that's not a good idea.

> >

> > She may not have ever known how to love

> > And I may have learned it by knowing what not to do with a child

> > But I did learn to love, to honor and hold my loved ones as they are

> > And not as I demand they should be to fill a void within me

> >

> > She taught me that vengeance is not only wrong

> > But one of the ugly abominations of this world

> > She taught me that seeing through my distorted mind

> > Was one of the worst sins I could commit against God

> >

> > For now that I know what I just cannot be

> > By what she intended to teach me

> > I realize I cannot be like that

> > I cannot disappoint my Maker and loved ones so

> >

> > Although in my life I have suffered consequences for her actions

> > I have been wounded by her so very many inactions

> > And I'd be justified in holding on to anger and fear

> > And spending the rest of my life feeling emotionally unsafe...

> >

> > I cannot and will not

> > Although I may be justified in holding on to all this pain

> > Its high time, I think

> > That I completely let go

> >

> > I am no longer a silent wounded hero-rescuer in a child

> > I am a healthy, happy and well-adjusted adult

> > I no longer need to protect myself by people pleasing for love

> > I've learned the love inside of me is all I need

> >

> > It's no longer a time to recount horror stories

> > Or belabor years of agony and pain

> > Or mishandled anger and denial

> > Its a time of letting go.

> >

>

>

>