Guest guest Posted September 29, 2011 Report Share Posted September 29, 2011 Mimi, I certainly haven't faced the dire threat of cancer, myself, but I did see it ravage and kill my mother. It left a different impact on me - an impression of thin = deathly which made dumping that image for myself lots easier than you have had to deal with. How interesting that I have the exact opposite battle when it comes to IE and self image. Physical vanity was never something that I felt I had any basis for. Yet this also made it more difficult for me to buy into a more image oriented life which has it pluses and minuses too. I can't speak to your gnawing feeling (sensation or impression?) but I did find that for me eating lots of carbs - mostly sugars - would put me into what I called a roller coaster ride of highs followed by diving lows which screamed to me to eat more sweets for another high ... Its real difficult to enjoy the view (at the top) when one is hanging on for dear life as I plunge into a dark tunnel! There could be good news in this turn of events for you. To me it says that you are getting ready to deal with another 'step' in your IE journey. I know I experience 'starter's anxiety' when I begin something. And that usually disappears as soon as I get going. Sooo if you cantake a deep breath, grab a hold of that deprivation feeling and give it a good shake to see what falls out of it, I hope you could be in for an insightful surprise. Maybe imagine it as a pinata which you are going to crack open with a big IE stick?! lol BEST to you and great posting too. Katcha IEing since March 2007 > > I am having real concern about the amount of processed foods I've been eating. I've been giving all kinds of advice here (that I believe! LOL) that I find to accept and follow myself. My thoughts often turn to restricting. When I eat processed simple carbs, I often feel a gnawing sensation in my body for more. It's not hunger, it's drive. I am driven to eat them. I've been somewhat successful asking myself what I am actually craving and how I can take care of myself at the moment without overeating. The trouble is that even if I find a way to give myself emotional sustenance (if that's what I really need), the gnawing sensation doesn't go away, and neither does the sense of deprivation when I don't indulge. So, I do. > > It doesn't help that I feel my pants tightening, either. I really hope I'm not triggering anyone here by talking about weight. I'm not weighing, but I am beginning to feel that I will surely slide into obesity soon. I guess I'm in a down place with food and just need to get this out. All my life I have been defined by my looks and weight. I was thin and good looking and that was the be all and end all of everything. Please forgive me for being so vain, but when I started gaining weight I felt as though I was less worthy. I went from " model-worthy " in my 20's to an overweight woman with a bulging stomach, a hunk carved out of one breast, and patchy spots of overgrown skin cells all over my body. My once thick tame hair never recovered from chemo and became thin and dry and I developed a scalp condition and arthritis. Although very happy to still be here, I felt that my body was a shadow of what it once was, and I was only 34. Soooo, it's very hard for me > to accept gaining weight on top of this. > > Anyway, I want to stay the course. I guess I just needed to write all that out and process it. Thanks for listening! > > Mimi > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 30, 2011 Report Share Posted September 30, 2011 Thanks. I was having a bit of a moment yesterday, but I'm better today. Still trying to feed myself on demand. You're right about the gnawing feeling. It is the reaction of my body to simple carbs. I always knew that, but somehow I had the feeling that if my body was craving the simple carbs I had to have them even if I knew the consequences. I guess I haven't internalized the "honors my body" part of the equation yet. Another thing to learn on this (great) journey. Mimi Subject: Re: trouble with processed foodsTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Thursday, September 29, 2011, 8:21 PM Mimi, I certainly haven't faced the dire threat of cancer, myself, but I did see it ravage and kill my mother. It left a different impact on me - an impression of thin = deathly which made dumping that image for myself lots easier than you have had to deal with. How interesting that I have the exact opposite battle when it comes to IE and self image. Physical vanity was never something that I felt I had any basis for. Yet this also made it more difficult for me to buy into a more image oriented life which has it pluses and minuses too. I can't speak to your gnawing feeling (sensation or impression?) but I did find that for me eating lots of carbs - mostly sugars - would put me into what I called a roller coaster ride of highs followed by diving lows which screamed to me to eat more sweets for another high ... Its real difficult to enjoy the view (at the top) when one is hanging on for dear life as I plunge into a dark tunnel! There could be good news in this turn of events for you. To me it says that you are getting ready to deal with another 'step' in your IE journey. I know I experience 'starter's anxiety' when I begin something. And that usually disappears as soon as I get going. Sooo if you cantake a deep breath, grab a hold of that deprivation feeling and give it a good shake to see what falls out of it, I hope you could be in for an insightful surprise. Maybe imagine it as a pinata which you are going to crack open with a big IE stick?! lolBEST to you and great posting too.KatchaIEing since March 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 30, 2011 Report Share Posted September 30, 2011 Funny, when I picture myself much fatter, it just feels leaden and uncomfortable, as when I've been fatter, it was hard to move and my pants were always tight in some places and falling down in others. When I tried to imagine myself much lighter, I could only see myself about 50 of the more than 100 pounds down to normal, and the overwhelming feeling was springiness, light and able to move comfortably. Jane > > Mimi -- I just went through an exercise in Overcoming Overeating (chapter 17) wherein one first imagines oneself very much fatter and looks for the feeling that brings up, then imagines oneself very much thinner, and looks at what that brings up. The authors say that frequently people find that fatter feels more solid, safer, and that a lot of us have a fear of disappearing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 30, 2011 Report Share Posted September 30, 2011 Funny, when I picture myself much fatter, it just feels leaden and uncomfortable, as when I've been fatter, it was hard to move and my pants were always tight in some places and falling down in others. When I tried to imagine myself much lighter, I could only see myself about 50 of the more than 100 pounds down to normal, and the overwhelming feeling was springiness, light and able to move comfortably. Jane > > Mimi -- I just went through an exercise in Overcoming Overeating (chapter 17) wherein one first imagines oneself very much fatter and looks for the feeling that brings up, then imagines oneself very much thinner, and looks at what that brings up. The authors say that frequently people find that fatter feels more solid, safer, and that a lot of us have a fear of disappearing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 30, 2011 Report Share Posted September 30, 2011 Funny, when I picture myself much fatter, it just feels leaden and uncomfortable, as when I've been fatter, it was hard to move and my pants were always tight in some places and falling down in others. When I tried to imagine myself much lighter, I could only see myself about 50 of the more than 100 pounds down to normal, and the overwhelming feeling was springiness, light and able to move comfortably. Jane > > Mimi -- I just went through an exercise in Overcoming Overeating (chapter 17) wherein one first imagines oneself very much fatter and looks for the feeling that brings up, then imagines oneself very much thinner, and looks at what that brings up. The authors say that frequently people find that fatter feels more solid, safer, and that a lot of us have a fear of disappearing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 30, 2011 Report Share Posted September 30, 2011 It's funny how different our experiences are. When I was a child and painfully thin, I would always pray to put on weight so that I would look more "substantial." Of course I was too young then to understand that putting on weight for a woman is a big no-no in our culture. Now when I imagine myself much heavier, I have a sense of doom and I feel unhealthy. Much thinner makes me feel just neutral. Mimi Subject: Re: trouble with processed foodsTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Friday, September 30, 2011, 4:51 PM Funny, when I picture myself much fatter, it just feels leaden and uncomfortable, as when I've been fatter, it was hard to move and my pants were always tight in some places and falling down in others.When I tried to imagine myself much lighter, I could only see myself about 50 of the more than 100 pounds down to normal, and the overwhelming feeling was springiness, light and able to move comfortably.Jane MARKETPLACE Stay on top of your group activity without leaving the page you're on - Get the Yahoo! Toolbar now. Switch to: Text-Only, Daily Digest • Unsubscribe • Terms of Use .. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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