Re: Newbie in Washington State

[Guest guest]

sanamu, WELCOME! and thank you for sharing so wonderfully.  You have learned a lot and your sharing your story has helped me a lot.  Keep posting.  It is funny how easy it sounds and how hard it can be.  I have days, like today that I am off track, but I notice it and let it go. I have been eating emotionally today an have been very stressed. So I am trying to be gentle with myself. And you are so insightful.  Great job.  Thanks again. Sandy

 

Hello all,

Signed up today for this group; have been listening to Geneen Roth's info and flailing a bit to stay on track with eating only when I'm hungry... versus... the other way. Funny how hard this is; sounds so easy. It's not hard - it's just there's all this stuff in the way of it being easy...

Today was a day where I just didn't want to be in touch with my body's hunger; I was tired, didn't want to go to work and let myself slide into eating emotionally while being distracted and pouty and resentful at life most of the day. Not good progress, but at least I noticed and didn't panic about it.

I've been taking in information on the non-diet approach for a long time now - in between various diets and non-diets, oh and yes myriad diet books. Over time my lack of self trust around food has cooled, my compulsivity is abating and I'm noticing small behavioral changes. Am waiting to get hungry tonight having decided to have one meal today when I'm actually hungry. Don't know if I'll actually get hungry though, but if not so be it. I just want that reward of having something to eat when I'm able to actually enjoy the process.

I do notice that when I'm quiet and actually eating when I'm hungry and eating what my body wants it feels so nourishing and rich - and I want more of that feeling. Such a simple thing - self nurturning with food versus using it to shut myself up. I can see/tell that letting go of food obsession, or being released from it would open a new world beyond obsessing about how much I weigh and what I ate last and will eat next.

Still, I realize it will take some time and practice to get to the point where I can live inside my own skin in peace and not use food as a weapon, numbing agent or an excuse for not living the life I want.

That's enough out of me. Hope this works well for all of us.