Re: interventions for families with BPD?

[Guest guest]

I have tried twice and been rebuffed both times. It's not 'bad enough' according

to both social services and the juvenile police officer that I talked to.

Honestly, I think a mistake that I made is that I need to talk to a social

worker and say what exactly is it that would get your attention in a home where

the kids were not being physically beaten every day and covered in bruises. If

the abuse is not physical, but psychological, then what would a person have to

say in order to get some help for the family. In my situation one good thing is

that my sister in law refuses to do any cleaning of any kind. So her house

generally looks like a disgusting crack den, and I am in no way exaggerating. So

right now the kids are safe here with their grandparents, but when they move on

eventually, if ever, I know there will at least be a visible sign of her mental

illness. I usually think of that as a dysfunction but in this one instance it is

a huge asset for which I am grateful.

>

> There were many people who knew my nada was a freaking nut. My neighbors

remember her tying me up to the lamp post one night and leaving me in the dark.

(I was 3 and wanted to be a pony-not just BUY a pony, but actually BE one! LOL!)

Nada claims I cried myself to sleep everynight about it. IT drove her so crazy

that she tied something around my waist, led me out to the lamp post in the yard

and left me there til I cried that I wanted to be a little girl.

> Other people (school counselors, my dad, step-dad, aunts, uncles, friends,

parents of friends, and even the police) saw what she was like. Yet no one

stopped her.

> This brings me to my REAL question-if you saw someone, and you suspected that

he/she had BPD would you seek help for their kids? I know someone who is

OBVIOUSLY BPD, her children are INSANE (seriously they are 12 and 9 and show

signs of dellusional thinking, anxiety disorders, and total loss of reality,

anti-social behaviors, but who can blame them?). Is there anything a regular

person can do? I ALWAYS wanted someone to step in and help me....and now here I

am watching it from afar. It's killing me. (Her husband goes along with it

because he has learned that it's much easier to support her insanity and rage,

than to get the brunt of it and living with her has cost him all of his common

sense).

>

[Guest guest]

It doesn't appear to be consistent, but at least in some cases children will be

removed from their parent's custody for their own safety if the home is

extremely filthy to the point of attracting vermin. Piles of animal excrement,

rotting animal carcasses in the home and rotting garbage attract rats (as well

as swarms of cockroaches and other pests). From what I understand most cities or

counties will come and investigate if neighbors report a stench, or hoarded

collections of objects stacked up on the property, or report seeing lots of

rats, as that is a public health hazard. Such conditions can be considered

dangerous enough to remove the children for their own safety.

Kudos to you for even trying to protect children that you know are suffering

from being tormented or neglected by mentally ill parents. Just trying to help

the kids instead of turning away and ignoring it means something.

-Annie

> >

> > There were many people who knew my nada was a freaking nut. My neighbors

remember her tying me up to the lamp post one night and leaving me in the dark.

(I was 3 and wanted to be a pony-not just BUY a pony, but actually BE one! LOL!)

Nada claims I cried myself to sleep everynight about it. IT drove her so crazy

that she tied something around my waist, led me out to the lamp post in the yard

and left me there til I cried that I wanted to be a little girl.

> > Other people (school counselors, my dad, step-dad, aunts, uncles, friends,

parents of friends, and even the police) saw what she was like. Yet no one

stopped her.

> > This brings me to my REAL question-if you saw someone, and you suspected

that he/she had BPD would you seek help for their kids? I know someone who is

OBVIOUSLY BPD, her children are INSANE (seriously they are 12 and 9 and show

signs of dellusional thinking, anxiety disorders, and total loss of reality,

anti-social behaviors, but who can blame them?). Is there anything a regular

person can do? I ALWAYS wanted someone to step in and help me....and now here I

am watching it from afar. It's killing me. (Her husband goes along with it

because he has learned that it's much easier to support her insanity and rage,

than to get the brunt of it and living with her has cost him all of his common

sense).

> >

>