Re: Sitting in Class Right Now On Campus

[Guest guest]

Girl, it's not brave if you're not scared.

You go!! What a wonderful, spectacular thing you are doing!! You have a whole

" team " here that knows you can do it. You are much more than a survivor--you

found a way to thrive!

I, too, had tons of anxiety when I went back to college. The first time for me

was disasterous, as well. The second time I went, I worked full time, went to

school full time, pulled straight A's and was on the student counsel. Which was

far, far easier than you'd think! Yes, it was challenging . . . but once you go

to school for the right field and go at the right time, its great.

Good for you. What a great, wonderful step! And don't worry--the triggers will

settle down just as soon as you start to realize you're " home. "

Blessings,

Karla

>

> I am sitting in my counseling class right now during introductions. I just

wanted to thank you all for being there and giving me support I never had

before. Being on campus still brings up some big issues for me - KO related and

personal past problems. I had so much trouble relating to peers when I left for

college. Pretty much crashed and burned with suicidality and hospitalizations.

>

> So I'm now in a master's counseling program to learn to help others. It's

nice to have someone/somewhere to check in with people who actually care and

have the capacity to care about me.

>

> I'm trying to go part-time because I run a tree service company and stay home

as much as possible with my boys. I so often second-guess myself wondering if I

should be going full-time (as a KO, can never do enough or be good enough). I

would really like to not be doing this at all right now, but I feel that I could

help kids in school counseling. I want to be working toward the degree so I'll

be ready to work in a few years. The whole idea seemed good in theory but is

really getting to be too much for me right now. (Perhaps because the kids just

got out of the hospital after Christmas and my depression/anxiety is pretty high

right now.)

>

> I feel like I could start crying right now (just started Wellbutrin a couple

of days ago). Thanks for listening. Also keep wondering if some random shooter

might come in the door at any minute. (Obviously anxiety issues brought up from

the school-related stress.)

>

> +Coal Miner's Daughter

>

[Guest guest]

Girl, it's not brave if you're not scared.

You go!! What a wonderful, spectacular thing you are doing!! You have a whole

" team " here that knows you can do it. You are much more than a survivor--you

found a way to thrive!

I, too, had tons of anxiety when I went back to college. The first time for me

was disasterous, as well. The second time I went, I worked full time, went to

school full time, pulled straight A's and was on the student counsel. Which was

far, far easier than you'd think! Yes, it was challenging . . . but once you go

to school for the right field and go at the right time, its great.

Good for you. What a great, wonderful step! And don't worry--the triggers will

settle down just as soon as you start to realize you're " home. "

Blessings,

Karla

>

> I am sitting in my counseling class right now during introductions. I just

wanted to thank you all for being there and giving me support I never had

before. Being on campus still brings up some big issues for me - KO related and

personal past problems. I had so much trouble relating to peers when I left for

college. Pretty much crashed and burned with suicidality and hospitalizations.

>

> So I'm now in a master's counseling program to learn to help others. It's

nice to have someone/somewhere to check in with people who actually care and

have the capacity to care about me.

>

> I'm trying to go part-time because I run a tree service company and stay home

as much as possible with my boys. I so often second-guess myself wondering if I

should be going full-time (as a KO, can never do enough or be good enough). I

would really like to not be doing this at all right now, but I feel that I could

help kids in school counseling. I want to be working toward the degree so I'll

be ready to work in a few years. The whole idea seemed good in theory but is

really getting to be too much for me right now. (Perhaps because the kids just

got out of the hospital after Christmas and my depression/anxiety is pretty high

right now.)

>

> I feel like I could start crying right now (just started Wellbutrin a couple

of days ago). Thanks for listening. Also keep wondering if some random shooter

might come in the door at any minute. (Obviously anxiety issues brought up from

the school-related stress.)

>

> +Coal Miner's Daughter

>

[Guest guest]

Girl, it's not brave if you're not scared.

You go!! What a wonderful, spectacular thing you are doing!! You have a whole

" team " here that knows you can do it. You are much more than a survivor--you

found a way to thrive!

I, too, had tons of anxiety when I went back to college. The first time for me

was disasterous, as well. The second time I went, I worked full time, went to

school full time, pulled straight A's and was on the student counsel. Which was

far, far easier than you'd think! Yes, it was challenging . . . but once you go

to school for the right field and go at the right time, its great.

Good for you. What a great, wonderful step! And don't worry--the triggers will

settle down just as soon as you start to realize you're " home. "

Blessings,

Karla

>

> I am sitting in my counseling class right now during introductions. I just

wanted to thank you all for being there and giving me support I never had

before. Being on campus still brings up some big issues for me - KO related and

personal past problems. I had so much trouble relating to peers when I left for

college. Pretty much crashed and burned with suicidality and hospitalizations.

>

> So I'm now in a master's counseling program to learn to help others. It's

nice to have someone/somewhere to check in with people who actually care and

have the capacity to care about me.

>

> I'm trying to go part-time because I run a tree service company and stay home

as much as possible with my boys. I so often second-guess myself wondering if I

should be going full-time (as a KO, can never do enough or be good enough). I

would really like to not be doing this at all right now, but I feel that I could

help kids in school counseling. I want to be working toward the degree so I'll

be ready to work in a few years. The whole idea seemed good in theory but is

really getting to be too much for me right now. (Perhaps because the kids just

got out of the hospital after Christmas and my depression/anxiety is pretty high

right now.)

>

> I feel like I could start crying right now (just started Wellbutrin a couple

of days ago). Thanks for listening. Also keep wondering if some random shooter

might come in the door at any minute. (Obviously anxiety issues brought up from

the school-related stress.)

>

> +Coal Miner's Daughter

>

[Guest guest]

Smiles reading this.

Wellbutrin is working well for me. Depression colors your outlook on

everything. It is helpful to think of the depression as someone else,

and visualizing that her thoughts are not your thoughts.

Often the negative stuff comes from the depression, the warped emotions

caused by the seratonin levels being out of whack. You can recognize

them, feel them, but let your thought process say that is not me, that

is the depression.

Also, chocolate is a wonderful antidote to depression!

You might enjoy a book by Henri Nouwen, called The Wounded Healer.

Those who would heal, or be in healing professions, start and find the

resource they need to heal others out of their own woundedness.

Doug

>

> I am sitting in my counseling class right now during introductions. I

just wanted to thank you all for being there and giving me support I

never had before. Being on campus still brings up some big issues for

me - KO related and personal past problems. I had so much trouble

relating to peers when I left for college. Pretty much crashed and

burned with suicidality and hospitalizations.

>

> So I'm now in a master's counseling program to learn to help others.

It's nice to have someone/somewhere to check in with people who actually

care and have the capacity to care about me.

>

> I'm trying to go part-time because I run a tree service company and

stay home as much as possible with my boys. I so often second-guess

myself wondering if I should be going full-time (as a KO, can never do

enough or be good enough). I would really like to not be doing this at

all right now, but I feel that I could help kids in school counseling.

I want to be working toward the degree so I'll be ready to work in a few

years. The whole idea seemed good in theory but is really getting to be

too much for me right now. (Perhaps because the kids just got out of

the hospital after Christmas and my depression/anxiety is pretty high

right now.)

>

> I feel like I could start crying right now (just started Wellbutrin a

couple of days ago). Thanks for listening. Also keep wondering if some

random shooter might come in the door at any minute. (Obviously anxiety

issues brought up from the school-related stress.)

>

> +Coal Miner's Daughter

>

[Guest guest]

Dear Karla and Doug,

Thanks for taking time to reply. It means a lot.

The anxiety did start to calm down pretty quick. Wellbutrin seems to work a lot

differently than the " regular " SSRIs (like prozac, paxil). I wonder at the

dopamine and norepinephrine connection. This medication also seems to help

reduce my binging. Basically, I take Wellbutrin and feel like a " normal "

person.

I also noticed that classmates were nervous during introductions - voices

wavering, red faces, etc. (even the professor). I think it is common to feel

overwhelmed in the first class, even those who seem to have it all together

(whatever " it " is). :-)

I can do that - make the depression separate from me. And Karla - great point

about something worth doing being difficult. And this program is a good fit for

me.

Blessings and Thanks,

+Coal Miner's Daughter

>

> Smiles reading this.

>

> Wellbutrin is working well for me. Depression colors your outlook on

> everything. It is helpful to think of the depression as someone else,

> and visualizing that her thoughts are not your thoughts.

>

> Often the negative stuff comes from the depression, the warped emotions

> caused by the seratonin levels being out of whack. You can recognize

> them, feel them, but let your thought process say that is not me, that

> is the depression.

>

> Also, chocolate is a wonderful antidote to depression!

>

> You might enjoy a book by Henri Nouwen, called The Wounded Healer.

> Those who would heal, or be in healing professions, start and find the

> resource they need to heal others out of their own woundedness.

>

> Doug

>

[Guest guest]

Dear Karla and Doug,

Thanks for taking time to reply. It means a lot.

The anxiety did start to calm down pretty quick. Wellbutrin seems to work a lot

differently than the " regular " SSRIs (like prozac, paxil). I wonder at the

dopamine and norepinephrine connection. This medication also seems to help

reduce my binging. Basically, I take Wellbutrin and feel like a " normal "

person.

I also noticed that classmates were nervous during introductions - voices

wavering, red faces, etc. (even the professor). I think it is common to feel

overwhelmed in the first class, even those who seem to have it all together

(whatever " it " is). :-)

I can do that - make the depression separate from me. And Karla - great point

about something worth doing being difficult. And this program is a good fit for

me.

Blessings and Thanks,

+Coal Miner's Daughter

>

> Smiles reading this.

>

> Wellbutrin is working well for me. Depression colors your outlook on

> everything. It is helpful to think of the depression as someone else,

> and visualizing that her thoughts are not your thoughts.

>

> Often the negative stuff comes from the depression, the warped emotions

> caused by the seratonin levels being out of whack. You can recognize

> them, feel them, but let your thought process say that is not me, that

> is the depression.

>

> Also, chocolate is a wonderful antidote to depression!

>

> You might enjoy a book by Henri Nouwen, called The Wounded Healer.

> Those who would heal, or be in healing professions, start and find the

> resource they need to heal others out of their own woundedness.

>

> Doug

>

[Guest guest]

Dear Karla and Doug,

Thanks for taking time to reply. It means a lot.

The anxiety did start to calm down pretty quick. Wellbutrin seems to work a lot

differently than the " regular " SSRIs (like prozac, paxil). I wonder at the

dopamine and norepinephrine connection. This medication also seems to help

reduce my binging. Basically, I take Wellbutrin and feel like a " normal "

person.

I also noticed that classmates were nervous during introductions - voices

wavering, red faces, etc. (even the professor). I think it is common to feel

overwhelmed in the first class, even those who seem to have it all together

(whatever " it " is). :-)

I can do that - make the depression separate from me. And Karla - great point

about something worth doing being difficult. And this program is a good fit for

me.

Blessings and Thanks,

+Coal Miner's Daughter

>

> Smiles reading this.

>

> Wellbutrin is working well for me. Depression colors your outlook on

> everything. It is helpful to think of the depression as someone else,

> and visualizing that her thoughts are not your thoughts.

>

> Often the negative stuff comes from the depression, the warped emotions

> caused by the seratonin levels being out of whack. You can recognize

> them, feel them, but let your thought process say that is not me, that

> is the depression.

>

> Also, chocolate is a wonderful antidote to depression!

>

> You might enjoy a book by Henri Nouwen, called The Wounded Healer.

> Those who would heal, or be in healing professions, start and find the

> resource they need to heal others out of their own woundedness.

>

> Doug

>