Re: Sitting in Class Right Now On Campus

[Guest guest]

Smiles reading this.

Wellbutrin is working well for me. Depression colors your outlook on

everything. It is helpful to think of the depression as someone else,

and visualizing that her thoughts are not your thoughts.

Often the negative stuff comes from the depression, the warped emotions

caused by the seratonin levels being out of whack. You can recognize

them, feel them, but let your thought process say that is not me, that

is the depression.

Also, chocolate is a wonderful antidote to depression!

You might enjoy a book by Henri Nouwen, called The Wounded Healer.

Those who would heal, or be in healing professions, start and find the

resource they need to heal others out of their own woundedness.

Doug

>

> I am sitting in my counseling class right now during introductions. I

just wanted to thank you all for being there and giving me support I

never had before. Being on campus still brings up some big issues for

me - KO related and personal past problems. I had so much trouble

relating to peers when I left for college. Pretty much crashed and

burned with suicidality and hospitalizations.

>

> So I'm now in a master's counseling program to learn to help others.

It's nice to have someone/somewhere to check in with people who actually

care and have the capacity to care about me.

>

> I'm trying to go part-time because I run a tree service company and

stay home as much as possible with my boys. I so often second-guess

myself wondering if I should be going full-time (as a KO, can never do

enough or be good enough). I would really like to not be doing this at

all right now, but I feel that I could help kids in school counseling.

I want to be working toward the degree so I'll be ready to work in a few

years. The whole idea seemed good in theory but is really getting to be

too much for me right now. (Perhaps because the kids just got out of

the hospital after Christmas and my depression/anxiety is pretty high

right now.)

>

> I feel like I could start crying right now (just started Wellbutrin a

couple of days ago). Thanks for listening. Also keep wondering if some

random shooter might come in the door at any minute. (Obviously anxiety

issues brought up from the school-related stress.)

>

> +Coal Miner's Daughter

>