Re: Re: How far away do you live?

[Guest guest]

I moved 2 states away, which in the midwest is pretty far. I at first moved

to the other side of town where my college was, and then ended up having to

move to a large city because my husband can't drive.

It did move us away from his parents and sister, who all are wonderful and

supportive, but I'm adjusting to the city live and we're both making

friends.

>

>

> I got lucky...nada uprooted herself from my state and went to go live with

> a drug addict friend of hers 3 states away. Phew! I lucked out major! My

> family is spreading out and moving away too. We only connect on facebook

> sadly. But, it is what it is. You learn to get by differently than you

> expected. I guess that's really it--you readjust your expectations. It gets

> easier to deal with in time.

>

>

>

> >

> > By reading through this board, I've gotten the feeling that many of us

> moved away from the BPD in our life.

> >

> > Question to everyone:

> >

> > How many miles away from your pwBPD do you live?

> >

> > When and why did you decide to move away?

> >

> >

> > I'll start

> >

> > -I live approx 250 miles away from Nada. Sadly, that has also moved me

> 250 miles away from the family that is good to me and that i miss dearly.

> >

> > -I made the choice to move as far away as possible without being

> completely separated from the " good family " when I was a senior in High

> School and choosing a college. I first lived about 5 hours away, then moved

> a tad closer a year later when i transferred to a diff school.

> >

> > -Before I knew anything about BPD, I did know I didn't want her

> controlling me, her anger to embarrass me, and I wanted it to be a time for

> her to stop depending on me so much and get help from others. I wanted to

> live my own life. I just thought it was typical for an 18 year old to feel

> that way when going to college... but looking back on it, my motives were

> WAY different than the " typical " 18 year old.

> >

> > Now your turn, GO!

> >

> > -JL

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I live 300 miles from where my nada lived before she passed away last fall.

I commend others who can live in the same town. It would have been very

difficult for me to live near her. Although I did not know about BPD until

the last year and a half of her life, I knew that I could not live near her.

I was far too emmeshed. Maybe with more time and establishing different

boundaries and patterns I could have lived closer, but even talking to her

on the phone could affect me for days, so I felt like I really, really

needed to have the distance in order to have some level of sanity and a life

that she was mostly not a part of.

>

>

> By being away from her, I felt like I could have more of a life of my own.

> Like I could have my own world, where she couldn't just come in and

> interfere with everything.

> I have always liked to travel and live abroad, but now in retrospect I feel

> like maybe it was also because of *how much* I was growing on a personal

> level when I was away and on my own.

> I live in the US now. It's been fours years, some of the happiest of my

> life. My Mom lives in France.

>

> I still sometimes feel like it's all a dream, that's gonna end.

>

>

>