small light bulb moment

[Guest guest]

I very much liked what Jane recently shared with us from The Overfed Head book.

I copied over the text that I felt sang to me and put it right by my place at

the dinner table. And completely ignored it!! I found myself eating when I knew

I wasn't hungry, didn't panic or such and knew I would figure what was bothering

me if I didn't push. When I finally realized that it was because I hadn't been

'following' those excellent guidelines, I knew my drive to eating had been

triggered by a feeling of 'failure'.

I am aware of and see myself as a 'fast' type person. I generally pick up new

things quickly, usually at first pass. So when I don't immediately 'get'

something, a feeling of failure (on my part) can hit me. I eat fast, whether due

to habit or that being my 'normal pace' or being over hungry when I sit down or

because I prefer hot food to be hot etc. Eating 'mindfully' sounds so alien to

me. The few times I have managed to eat without distractions, by own internal

gremlins distract me with messages deemed to prevent me from accomplishing this

hurdle. Sorta reminds me of sensory deprivation where one's brain hallucinates

to 'fill' the void of input. This isn't an excuse, just an observation that I am

glad I am able to see for myself.

Bottom line for me - at this moment - is that while I am happy to be at the

place I am with my body and eating, I could be approaching a fork (fun pun ;-)

in my IE journey? Hmmm. I like to think that I am ready to, as Yogi Berra would

say 'When you come to a fork in the road - take it. " , embark on a new path that

could lead me to an even better 'place' for me. Finding and understanding MY

motivation to do so is what I need to do, not simply follow some 'good

guidelines'. That's so instant results type thinking and never destined to work

for me in the long run.

Thanks for listening. Its being able to write and share this with all you who

can and do understand that helps me help myself.

Katcha

IEing since March 2007