My first fortnight a surprising success!

[Guest guest]

Today makes 2 weeks I've been practicing intuitive eating, and I see so much

positive progress!

1) I have been waiting until I'm truly feeling stomach hunger before eating.

Sometimes I've had to wait a VERY long time. I've been shocked to find myself

eating only 2-3 times a day (instead of my usual 5-6 times), probably because

I'm still eating too much each time.

2) I've chosen not to do anything else while eating (typically I would read or

be on the computer if it weren't a family meal), which has been difficult to

remember, but I've caught myself the few times I started to eat with

distractions. It does help me enjoy my meal and be more aware of my body

sensations.

3) I've done my best to notice when I'm no longer hungry, because the next step

seems to be that sickening overfull sensation I've spent most of my life

feeling. It's been the hardest part so far, and I've gone past that sweet spot

often. Gradually, the amounts I put on my plate have been getting smaller,

because I don't want the tummy ache and I want to be able to eat again that day.

4) I've been finding ways to sneak in tandem bike rides with my husband and

toddler whenever our older kids are away, just for fun, not as a " should " but

because it feels good. We did go on one bike ride with the whole family, which

requires me to ride on my own bike with a baby seat on the back, and I am in

such terrible shape that 20 minutes and 2 tiny little hills made me honestly

afraid I'd have a heart attack, and needless to say, I have NOT asked to repeat

that experience! I'm still recovering from a sprained ankle, so walking much is

out, which makes me feel cooped up and disabled. Riding on the tandem is

wonderful - I feel strong and free and exhilarated and love working as a team

with my husband. It seems like I am just more able to take care of myself in

general, while not punishing myself around food.

The results are great so far. I am feeling at peace, not thinking about food

unless I'm hungry. As a matter of fact, I'm really wondering what happened to

all those emotional eating urges? I assume they'll return, although come to

think about it, I don't remember them the month I did this a decade ago. I've

always been absolutely TERRIBLE at dieting, never able to stick to a food plan

even an entire day, and losing a pound a month was about it when I was really

obsessing on it, counting calories or exchanges or whatever, exercising every

day, keeping a log of everything under the sun, etc. Yet somehow 5 pounds have

dropped off over this 2 weeks of peace! I'm amazed, given how painless and

pleasant my life has been without constant " diet-think. " Maybe it's because I

haven't been denying myself any foods in a while, so I haven't felt any drive to

eat a lot of anything to prove that I can. I have a GREAT deal of excess

weight, basically half what I weigh, and my fat has been life-long. I have

significant weight-related health issues, so I am very pleased. I'd been

feeling hopeless about it all lately, fatalistically assuming I would die within

the next 5 years and leave my husband, who has a major mental illness, widowed

and having to parent alone our 3 adopted children (our teen has mental

retardation and multiple disabilities, our pre-teen has mental illness and

behavioral and learning issues, and our toddler so far so good but prenatally

exposed and so likely to have special needs show up at some point).

My current IE challenges are:

1) Noticing the point at which I am no longer hungry and should stop eating.

I'm trying to remember to drink a glass of water and to put my fork or food down

after each bite to slow myself down, because I eat much faster than other people

around me and that doesn't give my body time to signal " satisfied. " It's not

coming easily.

2) Not having a routine down for how to feed my family when I don't want to cook

when I'm not hungry and then when I am hungry, it not being near a family

mealtime and so not wanting to cook just for me. (Hmm, maybe I should cook

ahead for the family then, and have some as my meal? I just haven't felt

interested in cooking at all, but I am a much better cook than those convenience

foods we could buy at high expense.)

3) Wanting to eat dinner with the family. It's been happening some of the time,

when I'm actually hungry at dinner time or when I get hungry and my husband

suggests we just all eat at that point. But it feels all wrong when they eat

without me, because I'm not hungry yet.

Any comments or suggestions?

Jane