Re: Eating in a Restaurant With Friends

[Guest guest]

One thing that worked really well for me when I did IE in the past was to ask

the server to bring a to-go box at the same time as my meal. I would put half of

the food in it before I ever started eating. This helped me by not putting such

a huge temptation right in front of me -- out of sight, out of mind! If I wasn't

very good at listening to my body as far as when to stop, at least I would stop

with far less than I would have if I hadn't put the food away first.

The other thing that helps about this is that by putting aside half first,

instead of thinking of it as a leftover bits of " treat " (which makes it more

tempting), I thought of it of it as another entire delicious meal that I could

enjoy later. The fact that it was a whole meal-sized portion helps with that;

you don't want to nibble on it so much because you don't want to mess up the

meal you have put aside for later.

Hope this helps.

Joanna

>

> Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine

with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several

times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with

them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really

hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not

to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection,

planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal,

brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry

but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this

shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a

glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

>

[Guest guest]

One thing that worked really well for me when I did IE in the past was to ask

the server to bring a to-go box at the same time as my meal. I would put half of

the food in it before I ever started eating. This helped me by not putting such

a huge temptation right in front of me -- out of sight, out of mind! If I wasn't

very good at listening to my body as far as when to stop, at least I would stop

with far less than I would have if I hadn't put the food away first.

The other thing that helps about this is that by putting aside half first,

instead of thinking of it as a leftover bits of " treat " (which makes it more

tempting), I thought of it of it as another entire delicious meal that I could

enjoy later. The fact that it was a whole meal-sized portion helps with that;

you don't want to nibble on it so much because you don't want to mess up the

meal you have put aside for later.

Hope this helps.

Joanna

>

> Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine

with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several

times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with

them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really

hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not

to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection,

planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal,

brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry

but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this

shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a

glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

>

[Guest guest]

One thing that worked really well for me when I did IE in the past was to ask

the server to bring a to-go box at the same time as my meal. I would put half of

the food in it before I ever started eating. This helped me by not putting such

a huge temptation right in front of me -- out of sight, out of mind! If I wasn't

very good at listening to my body as far as when to stop, at least I would stop

with far less than I would have if I hadn't put the food away first.

The other thing that helps about this is that by putting aside half first,

instead of thinking of it as a leftover bits of " treat " (which makes it more

tempting), I thought of it of it as another entire delicious meal that I could

enjoy later. The fact that it was a whole meal-sized portion helps with that;

you don't want to nibble on it so much because you don't want to mess up the

meal you have put aside for later.

Hope this helps.

Joanna

>

> Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine

with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several

times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with

them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really

hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not

to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection,

planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal,

brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry

but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this

shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a

glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

>

[Guest guest]

Sara,

Please be gentle with yourself. I think eating in a group is harder for all of

us, even when we ARE hungry. And most of us will find ourselves eating when we

are surrounded by the sight and sound of food. Intuitive eating during this

sort of situation is and advanced skill. We're all on a journey here, and our

progress is only hampered by self-recrimination.

What I have been doing in these situations is that on days I know I will be

eating socially at a certain time, I make a point of eating lightly when I am

hungry earlier, although of course I do eat to satisfaction. So, for example, I

might eat a bit of cheese instead of a sandwich. Or a piece of fruit or

snack-size candy bar instead of a full dessert. Then I am more likely to be

hungry in the group. I've actually found it VERY stressful figuring out what to

order, since not only am I used to sharing a meal with my husband and everything

looks too big, but my lady friends tend to comment on what everyone else is

getting, so that's one of my problems to work on. While I'm eating in a group,

I really try to focus on each bite and leave lots of space between bites. I

also make a point of stopping every so often and briefly zoning out on

conversation while I focus on my stomach and try to determine whether I'm

actually still hungry. I seem not to enjoy my food nearly so much in a group as

I do alone or with my husband. And yet, I tend to eat enough past the point of

" not hungry anymore " that I usually feel " full " or " slightly leaden " a few

minutes later when I am in a group.

Anyway, I encourage you to consider this all part of the learning curve and be

gentle with yourself.

Jane

>

> Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine

with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several

times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with

them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really

hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not

to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection,

planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal,

brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry

but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this

shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a

glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

>

[Guest guest]

Sara,

Please be gentle with yourself. I think eating in a group is harder for all of

us, even when we ARE hungry. And most of us will find ourselves eating when we

are surrounded by the sight and sound of food. Intuitive eating during this

sort of situation is and advanced skill. We're all on a journey here, and our

progress is only hampered by self-recrimination.

What I have been doing in these situations is that on days I know I will be

eating socially at a certain time, I make a point of eating lightly when I am

hungry earlier, although of course I do eat to satisfaction. So, for example, I

might eat a bit of cheese instead of a sandwich. Or a piece of fruit or

snack-size candy bar instead of a full dessert. Then I am more likely to be

hungry in the group. I've actually found it VERY stressful figuring out what to

order, since not only am I used to sharing a meal with my husband and everything

looks too big, but my lady friends tend to comment on what everyone else is

getting, so that's one of my problems to work on. While I'm eating in a group,

I really try to focus on each bite and leave lots of space between bites. I

also make a point of stopping every so often and briefly zoning out on

conversation while I focus on my stomach and try to determine whether I'm

actually still hungry. I seem not to enjoy my food nearly so much in a group as

I do alone or with my husband. And yet, I tend to eat enough past the point of

" not hungry anymore " that I usually feel " full " or " slightly leaden " a few

minutes later when I am in a group.

Anyway, I encourage you to consider this all part of the learning curve and be

gentle with yourself.

Jane

>

> Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine

with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several

times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with

them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really

hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not

to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection,

planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal,

brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry

but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this

shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a

glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

>

[Guest guest]

Sara,

Please be gentle with yourself. I think eating in a group is harder for all of

us, even when we ARE hungry. And most of us will find ourselves eating when we

are surrounded by the sight and sound of food. Intuitive eating during this

sort of situation is and advanced skill. We're all on a journey here, and our

progress is only hampered by self-recrimination.

What I have been doing in these situations is that on days I know I will be

eating socially at a certain time, I make a point of eating lightly when I am

hungry earlier, although of course I do eat to satisfaction. So, for example, I

might eat a bit of cheese instead of a sandwich. Or a piece of fruit or

snack-size candy bar instead of a full dessert. Then I am more likely to be

hungry in the group. I've actually found it VERY stressful figuring out what to

order, since not only am I used to sharing a meal with my husband and everything

looks too big, but my lady friends tend to comment on what everyone else is

getting, so that's one of my problems to work on. While I'm eating in a group,

I really try to focus on each bite and leave lots of space between bites. I

also make a point of stopping every so often and briefly zoning out on

conversation while I focus on my stomach and try to determine whether I'm

actually still hungry. I seem not to enjoy my food nearly so much in a group as

I do alone or with my husband. And yet, I tend to eat enough past the point of

" not hungry anymore " that I usually feel " full " or " slightly leaden " a few

minutes later when I am in a group.

Anyway, I encourage you to consider this all part of the learning curve and be

gentle with yourself.

Jane

>

> Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine

with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several

times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with

them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really

hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not

to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection,

planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal,

brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry

but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this

shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a

glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

>

[Guest guest]

Joanna,

What a great idea! I'm going to try this.

Jane

> >

> > Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm

fine with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together

several times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get

together with them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I

wasn't really hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt

deprived not to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy

selection, planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for

a meal, brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was

hungry but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know

this shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just

get a glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> > I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Joanna,

What a great idea! I'm going to try this.

Jane

> >

> > Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm

fine with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together

several times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get

together with them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I

wasn't really hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt

deprived not to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy

selection, planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for

a meal, brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was

hungry but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know

this shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just

get a glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> > I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Most restaurants have the menus available on line and I try to ;look at the menu and decide what I want ahead of time because I have found that since I started IE it takes me longer to decide what to eat then it used to before IE I have also done the putting half the meal in the to go box before I start eating but I find that doesn't work to well for me because the to go box sitting there with half the food takes up room at the table and often now the restaurant tables are smaller. I look at the menu online and see if the restaurant has a small portion menu and decide what I want off the menu before I go. Eva

Joanna,What a great idea! I'm going to try this.Jane> >> > Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection, planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal, brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.> > I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.> >>------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Most restaurants have the menus available on line and I try to ;look at the menu and decide what I want ahead of time because I have found that since I started IE it takes me longer to decide what to eat then it used to before IE I have also done the putting half the meal in the to go box before I start eating but I find that doesn't work to well for me because the to go box sitting there with half the food takes up room at the table and often now the restaurant tables are smaller. I look at the menu online and see if the restaurant has a small portion menu and decide what I want off the menu before I go. Eva

Joanna,What a great idea! I'm going to try this.Jane> >> > Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection, planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal, brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.> > I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.> >>------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Most restaurants have the menus available on line and I try to ;look at the menu and decide what I want ahead of time because I have found that since I started IE it takes me longer to decide what to eat then it used to before IE I have also done the putting half the meal in the to go box before I start eating but I find that doesn't work to well for me because the to go box sitting there with half the food takes up room at the table and often now the restaurant tables are smaller. I look at the menu online and see if the restaurant has a small portion menu and decide what I want off the menu before I go. Eva

Joanna,What a great idea! I'm going to try this.Jane> >> > Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection, planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal, brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.> > I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.> >>------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the input! I will try taking half the meal off my plate first, as

well as looking online at the menus before I go. Good idea about not nibbling,

because that's exactly how I ended up eating what I brought home last night. I

love the term " slightly leaden " as that so aptly describes how I've felt many

times!

>

> Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine

with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several

times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with

them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really

hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not

to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection,

planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal,

brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry

but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this

shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a

glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

>

[Guest guest]

My bff is a "normal" eater. Her weight has always been consistent and her biggest challenge in life was that she ate too many king dongs once in grad school. She does something that has helped me. She orders to her appetite. So she asks the server how big something is and if it's big and she wants something small, she doesn't get it. She is the one who taught me to order an appetizer for my meal. She frequently takes home part of her small meal (so she can have dessert!) but she doesn't end up with gigundo portions. Patti

Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm fine with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together several times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get together with them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I wasn't really hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt deprived not to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy selection, planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for a meal, brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was hungry but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know this shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just get a glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

[Guest guest]

I don't skip meals before a restaurant date (I used to, to save calories for the

big splurge). Now, I eat breakfast and lunch as usual, so I don't go nuts when I

see anything with cream sauce, while devouring the entire bread basket to boot.

That way, my appetite is at its normal state when I make a decision, and i make

one based on what I want, not on what I feel like I deserve for having forsaken

all else.

Another thing that helped was going to restaurants more often. It takes the

scary out of menus. Even just thinking that I CAN go to a restaurant if I want

to, whenever I want to, makes it easier for me to embrace it for what it is: a

fun social outing that happens to feature yummy food.

Good luck!

>

> > Does anybody have ideas for restaurant eating? As far as eating goes, I'm

fine with rarely eating out, but that is what my friends do to get together

several times a week. I don't want to miss out on the opportunities to get

together with them, but neither do I do well with eating in a restaurant. I

wasn't really hungry when we got there, but then ended up eating because I felt

deprived not to eat. Ordered what I like to eat there, also a fairly healthy

selection, planning to eat some as the portions are more than I usually eat for

a meal, brought home what was left, but then ate it later on not because I was

hungry but because it felt like a treat and I couldn't leave it alone. I know

this shows how far I have to go with intuitive eating. I often go out and just

get a glass of tea, but last night I don't know why I didn't.

> > I'd appreciate any suggestions or feedback as to how to do better.

> >

> >

>