Nada in mental hospital

[Guest guest]

I make a new subject so we don't mix different themas.

Hi !

They pumped her stomach and did some toxic test and they didn't found nothing

except she is addicted to valium... but because she threatened with suicide they

have to observe her 72 hours and after that they decided to keep her in hospital

because she is in a bad condition ( depression, psychotic...)

Now she is in new department and has a new doctor who is very bad. I called her

doctor today and tell her the story and she told me that my mother clothes are

my problem. I asked her if she really new my mother diagnose and she said that

they don't treat her because of BPD , but because of depression???!!! It is like

if somebody would have cancer and they would said we don't care for cancer we

we'll treat him for feeling sick....??!! Thankfully this doctor goes to

vacation for 3 weeks and nada would have another one who would hopefully will be

more clever and knows better.

Anyway I forbade that any of their stuff ( nurses) call me in the middle of the

night to tell me my nada wishes. I can tell you she didn't like my tone:-)))

Nada was in hospital once before and at that time she was diagnosed with BPD.

Her doctor at that time said to me that he never ever in his career met a

patient who was capable ( like my nada) to manipulate with all the nurses for a

mounth!! before they discovered that she is using them. You should see

her.....she would win reword easily....she can be sweet, tender,

sensitive, fragile, deep, empatic, sad......if she wants to be. And she can be

pure evil if you don't play by her rules. The nurses even worked behind doctor

back ( poor lady is so sweet and nobody understand her..) I hope he will be next

doctor in charge for my nada. He helped me a lot when my nada was in hospital

that first time. Nada convinced me that she is not capable of taking care for

herself anymore than and I decided to become her legal guardian ( caretaker? I

don't now the English word but it means I would legaly take care of her because

she would have status of being legally incapable) He opened my eyes and told me

that I would put in my nada hand the worst possible weapon - she would have all

the possibilities to manipulate with me and I would be legal responible. So I

refuse my nada request and she miraculously gets better and has been living

successfully by herself another 10 years.

About nada clothes ..... I have called social worker and asked her to go to

nada house anyway and take some clothes. She is great - but completely burn out

because of nada but now when we cooperate it is easier for her and for me. She

agreed to go and i said to her if somebody will make some fuss I will cover

her by telling that I didn't tell her that nada doesn't allow to do it. She

takes care for the house anyway and she is inside the house 2 times a week.

After nada gets her clothes I'll buy her some tracksuit for Christmas ( is she

would behave...:-)

Thanks for your support. Nobody else who didn't experience BPD would not

understand where is the problem:

Yenaine

Re: can bpd's really love?

Yenaine,your nada tried to " commit suicide " with Valium? Lol...does she know

that you can't kill yourself with Valium?

Well,I'm sure her doctors know that...

Would it be possible for you (if you haven't already) to tell the head nurse

on your nada's ward about her social worker and to give her some general

instruction to inform any of the other nurses on the ward that if nada is

requesting something from " the outside " that she needs,such as (her own)

clothing,that her social worker should be contacted? And that if nada refuses

the assistance of the social worker,then oh well,she had a chance to get what

she requested but she herself refused it.Tell the mental ward staff that in the

interests of having your nada learn how to get her needs met that you want her

to learn how to avail herself of the assistance the social worker is there to

provide as a sort of training exercize for your nada so that she will continue

to independently help herself after she is relased.Something like that.Then let

*them* see when she refuses to.

Just a thought...No,don't buy her any clothes! She's really manipulative!

And asking for *your* clothes after she left you dressed like a beggar in your

youth..what can I say...yes,it sounds like another " attempted energy theft " ...

>

> I had the opposite story. My nada bribes with giving things to. But she is

extremely cheapskate. When I was living at my primary home and I was a teenager

i literally had not enough clothes, my shoes were with holes I probably looked

like a beggar....but it was better that than to let her manipulate with me if I

need something. She could manipulate for months ( I would give you...if you

would) for a pair of shoes. We where middle class family ( both of parents where

in high position in a little town) with enough money but I had to live and sleep

in the room without the heat ( winters here can be very cold) because it was not

worth to worm up my room. They put my sister and me in a small room in the attic

( inside the big house with 3 floors) and if I wanted to be warm or do anything

else ( when it was 10 degrees minus) I had to go downstairs to the flat where my

parents lived. Not to mention she bribes me with food too.....So I had spended

all winter under the pillow - literally -because I hate to go downstairs and

they where happy not to see me anyway.

>

> The same nada has called me today ( with help of the nurse who felt in nada

trap) that she needs some clothes. She came to hospital with emergency car (

after she was trying to make suicide with 10 Valiums....) and after the

observation they have put her in open department when you have your own clothes

not hospital ones. I don't have keys to her house ( she doesn't trust me), she

doesn't allow social worker who has a key and who voluntarily take care for nada

house momentary ( another victim of nada manipulation) to take some clothes and

send it to her. She doesn't want to buy new clothes - she would really needed

them anyway ( she claimes she has no money - she has a looot of money) And I

lived in place A, hospital is in place B and her house is in place C. And there

is a lot of miles to drive....So she came out with the idea and told the

nurse to call me if I could bring some of MY clothes to her????!!!!!!!!

>

> She really is inventive with finding ways to get me and my energy. Now I don't

know what to do (exept I would never enver put anything which is mine into her

hands---yak!!) . She is the only one in the group who has no private clothes and

she probably take full advantage of that. Poor old abandoned lady wandering

around in hospital with poor hospital clothes- nowbody takes care for her.... I

could buy her some clothes, but isn't that be her victory? I don't want to

reward her manipulative behavior. I was thinking to tell her if she would like

to have her clothes she has to except help from social worker. But she would

probably not ibecause it is too good for her to play victim. I'm really bored

with that.......

>

> I'm sorry I was long...:-( but I have to vent at least a bit...:-)