You are all my daily comfort!

[Guest guest]

I am new to the group and can not tell you how much help and comfort this group

is to me! I can not respond to every message but find so much of myself in each

one. It feels so good to know I am not alone, finally!

Fada is 87 and has lived with us for the last 17 months. I have changed from the

happy, healthy, assertive, self-respecting person I was to a nervous wreck. The

books SWOE and Surviving the Borderline Parent have been invaluable. I love the

Medium Chill technique some one described on this site. Thank you all for

sharing. I hope I can be more help to others, please know you are all helping me

as I learn to cope with this new and I hope last phase of being a KO. God

forgive me, but I pray every day for Fada to move on to the other side. He is so

incredibly miserable and desperate I can see no way to help him, how awful to

admit someone is beyond hope. I think as KO's we often grew up thinking we could

help them fix themselves it is so frustrating to admit nothing we can do will

help them. I am discovering a lot of anger within me and trying to work on

fixing it and trying to regain my calm. My husband and sons help, but fada is

definitely a pathetic self serving waif. I have a child who is bi-polar and he

takes his medicine and goes to see his doctor and practices good mental hygiene.

In comparison Fada loves being mentally ill and wallows in his mental illness

and loves scrounging for pity. It has been a huge eye opener to deal with

opposite ends of the mental illness spectrum. I am learning more about mental

illness than I ever thought possible. Again I extend my deepest gratitude to

this group. Being able to sign on daily and read every one's posts is so

helpful. I am really trying to figure out how to handle all the residual anger,

but I am getting there and being a member of this group is helpful.

Kay