Re: What would you do differently?

[Guest guest]

This is a very interesting thing to think about, Tilley. Thanks for posting it.Ellie To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wednesday, November 30, 2011 6:18 AM Subject:

What would you do differently?

I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter, and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to lose weight, would you still eat "diet foods" or would you try to find what you really like eating? They even asked "Would you still run five miles today?" which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting close to being), I definitely would.

I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got me to thinking, "Well, why can't I accept myself anyway?" So I'm fatter than I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed, I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and I'm going to get rid of the rest of my

wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least put it in the attic).

But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if the world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever again? What do you want from your life?

Tilley

[Guest guest]

I've actually been thinkibg abput this a lot in the past day or so, and almost

wishing it were true. It makes me focus on what I can do to feel my best, not

on som kind of magical changing-my-body thinking, as if I'm not good enough the

way I am, in order to LOOK different......

>

> This is a very interesting thing to think about, Tilley. Thanks for posting

it.

>

> Ellie

>

>

>

>

> >________________________________

> >

> >To: IntuitiveEating_Support

> >Sent: Wednesday, November 30, 2011 6:18 AM

> >Subject: What would you do differently?

> >

> >

> >Â

> >I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter,

and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world

where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right

now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope

I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

> >

> >I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to

lose weight, would you still eat " diet foods " or would you try to find what you

really like eating? They even asked " Would you still run five miles today? "

which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose

weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting

close to being), I definitely would.

> >

> >I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am

now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change

that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got

me to thinking, " Well, why can't I accept myself anyway? " So I'm fatter than

I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I

still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in

doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can

walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed,

I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting

people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a

revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way

I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and

I'm going to get rid of the rest of my

> wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least put it in the attic).

> >

> >But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if the

world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever again?

What do you want from your life?

> >

> >Tilley

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thinking about the question, if I knew my weight would always stay where it is now, yes, I would still run, because it's one of the things I do. I would still ride my bike because I like bike-riding. I like long-distance endurance sports and would continue to do them, since they don't seem to help me lose weight anyway (I must make up the difference when I "refuel.") It would be a relief to know I wouldn't ever get heavier than I am now, but I'd still be careful about *what* I eat because my cholesterol is screwed up. Now, if I knew I'd never have a heart attack or stroke no matter what, I'd probably throw caution to the wind :-) Anyway, although weight loss is not my reason for exercising, it is still in my mind that it helps keep me from gaining. (I still

gain easily, though.) It would be nice not to have to think about that at all. Maybe I'll stop thinking about it :-)Ellie To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Thursday, December 1, 2011 8:14 PM Subject: Re: What would you do differently?

I've actually been thinkibg abput this a lot in the past day or so, and almost wishing it were true. It makes me focus on what I can do to feel my best, not on som kind of magical changing-my-body thinking, as if I'm not good enough the way I am, in order to LOOK different......

>

> This is a very interesting thing to think about, Tilley. Thanks for posting it.

>

> Ellie

>

>

>

>

> >________________________________

> >

> >To: IntuitiveEating_Support

> >Sent: Wednesday, November 30, 2011 6:18 AM

> >Subject: What would you do differently?

> >

> >

> >Â

> >I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter, and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

> >

> >I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to lose weight, would you still eat "diet foods" or would you try to find what you really like eating? They even asked "Would you still run five miles today?" which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting close to being), I definitely would.

> >

> >I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got me to thinking, "Well, why can't I accept myself anyway?" So I'm fatter than I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed, I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and I'm going to get rid of the rest of

my

> wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least put it in the attic).

> >

> >But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if the world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever again? What do you want from your life?

> >

> >Tilley

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I have been thinking about this question.

I'd still want to be healthy. That involves exercise and giving my body the

nutrients it needs, which I'm not going to get by eating a large variety of

highly-processed baked goods. Ultimately I'd eat as I'm learning to eat now....a

variety of nourishing whole foods according to my hunger, along with a small

amount of fun food. I would excerise in moderation, doing what I enjoy...walking

and cycling, but I'd go to the gym for half an hour a day if I couldn't do those

things. So, in those respects, I really wouldn't change what I'm working toward.

I'd still want to learn to separate my eating from emotional issues. I'd still

want to learn to care about and for myself, after spending my life hating myself

and taking care of everyone else.

In other ways I would change....I'd get myself a decent haircut and take the

time to fix my hair, get some clothes that fit me rather than waiting until I

lose weight, and get out and do the things now that I always plan to do after I

lose weight.

Well, that's a really good question, and I guess what my answer is telling me is

that I'm headed in the right direction, and what the changes are that I need to

make now.

Thanks for posing the question!

Sara

>

> I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter,

and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world

where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right

now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope

I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

>

> I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to

lose weight, would you still eat " diet foods " or would you try to find what you

really like eating? They even asked " Would you still run five miles today? "

which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose

weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting

close to being), I definitely would.

>

> I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am

now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change

that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got

me to thinking, " Well, why can't I accept myself anyway? " So I'm fatter than

I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I

still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in

doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can

walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed,

I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting

people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a

revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way

I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and

I'm going to get rid of the rest of my wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least

put it in the attic).

>

> But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if the

world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever again?

What do you want from your life?

>

> Tilley

>

[Guest guest]

I like that list, the do it now list--get a decent haircut, fix my hair, get

some clothes that fit me rather than waiting....I need to do that too.

I've noticed over the years differences in how people dress and carry

themselves, and size really makes very little difference in attractiveness and

confidence. I've seen so many larger women who dress amazingly well, and who

are so confident, and then less large women, who wear clothes that don't fit and

who aren't confident at all. I think this is really going to be my project this

month--putting together a wardrobe of clothes that fit me and that I feel

attractive in.

As far as everything else, I'm totally with you on that--I feel so much better

when I exercise, and I sleep better, and I like feeling strong and energetic.

And I definitely don,t want to be obsessing about food.

Tilley

> >

> > I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter,

and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world

where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right

now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope

I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

> >

> > I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to

lose weight, would you still eat " diet foods " or would you try to find what you

really like eating? They even asked " Would you still run five miles today? "

which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose

weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting

close to being), I definitely would.

> >

> > I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am

now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change

that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got

me to thinking, " Well, why can't I accept myself anyway? " So I'm fatter than

I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I

still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in

doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can

walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed,

I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting

people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a

revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way

I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and

I'm going to get rid of the rest of my wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least

put it in the attic).

> >

> > But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if

the world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever

again? What do you want from your life?

> >

> > Tilley

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I like that list, the do it now list--get a decent haircut, fix my hair, get

some clothes that fit me rather than waiting....I need to do that too.

I've noticed over the years differences in how people dress and carry

themselves, and size really makes very little difference in attractiveness and

confidence. I've seen so many larger women who dress amazingly well, and who

are so confident, and then less large women, who wear clothes that don't fit and

who aren't confident at all. I think this is really going to be my project this

month--putting together a wardrobe of clothes that fit me and that I feel

attractive in.

As far as everything else, I'm totally with you on that--I feel so much better

when I exercise, and I sleep better, and I like feeling strong and energetic.

And I definitely don,t want to be obsessing about food.

Tilley

> >

> > I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter,

and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world

where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right

now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope

I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

> >

> > I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to

lose weight, would you still eat " diet foods " or would you try to find what you

really like eating? They even asked " Would you still run five miles today? "

which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose

weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting

close to being), I definitely would.

> >

> > I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am

now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change

that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got

me to thinking, " Well, why can't I accept myself anyway? " So I'm fatter than

I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I

still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in

doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can

walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed,

I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting

people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a

revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way

I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and

I'm going to get rid of the rest of my wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least

put it in the attic).

> >

> > But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if

the world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever

again? What do you want from your life?

> >

> > Tilley

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I like that list, the do it now list--get a decent haircut, fix my hair, get

some clothes that fit me rather than waiting....I need to do that too.

I've noticed over the years differences in how people dress and carry

themselves, and size really makes very little difference in attractiveness and

confidence. I've seen so many larger women who dress amazingly well, and who

are so confident, and then less large women, who wear clothes that don't fit and

who aren't confident at all. I think this is really going to be my project this

month--putting together a wardrobe of clothes that fit me and that I feel

attractive in.

As far as everything else, I'm totally with you on that--I feel so much better

when I exercise, and I sleep better, and I like feeling strong and energetic.

And I definitely don,t want to be obsessing about food.

Tilley

> >

> > I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter,

and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world

where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right

now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope

I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

> >

> > I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to

lose weight, would you still eat " diet foods " or would you try to find what you

really like eating? They even asked " Would you still run five miles today? "

which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose

weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting

close to being), I definitely would.

> >

> > I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am

now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change

that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got

me to thinking, " Well, why can't I accept myself anyway? " So I'm fatter than

I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I

still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in

doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can

walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed,

I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting

people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a

revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way

I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and

I'm going to get rid of the rest of my wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least

put it in the attic).

> >

> > But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if

the world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever

again? What do you want from your life?

> >

> > Tilley

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I love that we really do know what it is we want and need 'to do'! Isn't it

maddening that we end up seeking EXternal 'approval' to GO for it?!? I often

silently say to myself - " You do what you need and I'll take care of myself -

thank you very much. "

I so hope to hear about how your new haircut flatters you and perhaps give you a

lift too :-) IE isn't only about food and body . . .

ehugs, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

> >

> > I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter,

and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world

where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right

now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope

I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

> >

> > I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to

lose weight, would you still eat " diet foods " or would you try to find what you

really like eating? They even asked " Would you still run five miles today? "

which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose

weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting

close to being), I definitely would.

> >

> > I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am

now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change

that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got

me to thinking, " Well, why can't I accept myself anyway? " So I'm fatter than

I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I

still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in

doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can

walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed,

I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting

people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a

revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way

I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and

I'm going to get rid of the rest of my wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least

put it in the attic).

> >

> > But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if

the world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever

again? What do you want from your life?

> >

> > Tilley

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I love that we really do know what it is we want and need 'to do'! Isn't it

maddening that we end up seeking EXternal 'approval' to GO for it?!? I often

silently say to myself - " You do what you need and I'll take care of myself -

thank you very much. "

I so hope to hear about how your new haircut flatters you and perhaps give you a

lift too :-) IE isn't only about food and body . . .

ehugs, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

> >

> > I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter,

and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world

where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right

now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope

I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

> >

> > I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to

lose weight, would you still eat " diet foods " or would you try to find what you

really like eating? They even asked " Would you still run five miles today? "

which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose

weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting

close to being), I definitely would.

> >

> > I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am

now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change

that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got

me to thinking, " Well, why can't I accept myself anyway? " So I'm fatter than

I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I

still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in

doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can

walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed,

I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting

people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a

revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way

I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and

I'm going to get rid of the rest of my wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least

put it in the attic).

> >

> > But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if

the world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever

again? What do you want from your life?

> >

> > Tilley

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I love that we really do know what it is we want and need 'to do'! Isn't it

maddening that we end up seeking EXternal 'approval' to GO for it?!? I often

silently say to myself - " You do what you need and I'll take care of myself -

thank you very much. "

I so hope to hear about how your new haircut flatters you and perhaps give you a

lift too :-) IE isn't only about food and body . . .

ehugs, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

> >

> > I have been reading the book Overcoming Overeating by Hirschman and Munter,

and one of the things they ask their readers to do is enter a fantasy of a world

where no one would ever gain or lose a single ounce--that what you weight right

now is exactly what you will always weigh (I can't find the place now, so I hope

I get this right)--and to consider what you would do differently.

> >

> > I found this to be a very interesting question. If you were never going to

lose weight, would you still eat " diet foods " or would you try to find what you

really like eating? They even asked " Would you still run five miles today? "

which made me laugh, because the idea of running five miles in order to lose

weight is ludicrous, but if my heels were healed (which I think they're getting

close to being), I definitely would.

> >

> > I also really liked the idea of accepting myself exactly as I am

now--overweight and all (because if there was no way in the world to change

that, then there'd be no point in berating myself for being too fat), and it got

me to thinking, " Well, why can't I accept myself anyway? " So I'm fatter than

I'd like to be (a lot fatter than I'd like to be), so what? I'm still me. I

still have people I love in this world. I still have things I'm interested in

doing, and absolutely none of them have anything to do with how I look. I can

walk in the woods, make delicious meals for myself and the other people I feed,

I can make art and music, I can teach my students, I can talk to interesting

people. What does fat matter with that. Why this should feel like a

revelation, I don't know, but I'm really going to try to be okay with me the way

I am. I bought five pairs of pants a month or so ago that actually fit me, and

I'm going to get rid of the rest of my wardrobe that doesn't fit (or at least

put it in the attic).

> >

> > But I think it's a really good question--what would you do differently if

the world were a place where you would never gain or lose another pound ever

again? What do you want from your life?

> >

> > Tilley

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Wow!

And I say again, WOW!

This question of 'what would you do differently if you could never change your

body absolutely floored me. It hit me so hard I couldn't even answer the

question. The only thing that occurred to me what was " NO. I have to be able a

change my body! " I hate my body so much that the idea of not being able to

change it is like torture. I still can't even answer the question because the

voice in my head is screaming so loud.

This makes me so sad. I guess the idea that if I change my body it'll make a

gigantic difference in my life, that it'll somehow set me free is deeply rooted

in my consciousness.

Thank you for posting this. It is both a beautiful and horrible thing to become

aware of how much self-hatred still exists in me. Especially around my body.

Thanks for listening, Evan.

Sent from my iPhone