Re: Frustrated tonight

[Guest guest]

Jane, really appreciate your post. What a day you had, I can only hope today is a less harried day for you. But you did really well, considering the stress you were under and the changes we (you and I and others) have to make in our thinking and approach to food. That you realized you did not enjoy the poptart any more is a major breakthrough! When I am at that point unless I am extremely hungry, I refuse to eat something I really don't like. As you continue with IE you will find your tastes are more discriminating, that is a wonderful thought for me because it shows I can respect my own reactions, and especially when I stop eating it because I don't like it. I am always pleased when I realize that I no longer "like" something I used to gobble down and so I no longer eat it. That is a victory. But there will be days

like that -- you did great. I hope today is a less stressful day for you, but even if it's not, you are making great changes. TaiTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wednesday, August 17, 2011 1:28 AMSubject: Frustrated tonight

I'm feeling frustrated tonight. I feel like I tried to do everything right today, but I didn't get to enjoy any of my food today.

It was the first day of school and I was so glad to get my boys back into their routines, but it meant a LOT of extra work for me as well, and timing went haywire around eating.

Breakfast wasn't too bad, except I was so groggy getting up about 4-5 hours earlier than I have been. I was very hungry, so I knew it was okay to eat right away when I had the chance. I got some plain oatmeal cooking in the microwave and sat down with an hard-boiled egg and some sauce (Miracle Whip, mustard, pepper, and pickle relish mixed up)to make it like a deviled egg. Yum! But my difficult tween son showed up then and began making demands, which distracted me from my oatmeal and eating it became a chore. I somehow managed to notice my stomach enough to know I could finish the bowl but didn't need anything else. I had brewed a pot of tea, but barely got going on that, with all the interruptions. After my sons were off to school, my toddler daughter hadn't woken up yet, so I went back to bed and gratefully got a nap. When we got up, I had to feed her and prepare to run my errands. Once we were about ready to go, I noticed I was caving in. Since I was going to Costco, I figured they would have samples and that often amounts to a small meal, so I just had a little bit of melon to tide me over. I was still actively hungry and annoyed that I had to take meds in to a school nurse before getting to those samples. Then wouldn't you know it, there were only 2 samples! I got about 2 tablespoons of lemonade and 2 tortilla chips with tzatziki sauce. Period. By the time I left Costco an hour later, I was REALLY hungry and annoyed that all the stuff which sounded good was out because my daughter would want some and is lactose intolerant. Home and had to race to unload the stuff, which was hard with my sore ankle getting worse by the minute. Put it away while feeding my toddler and saw that any minute, a stranger sent by my teenage son's agency would show up and need me to spend hours training him to care for my disabled son. So I scarfed a couple of Pop Tarts, which were not as good as I

remembered. (My sons are welcome to the rest of them! I'd rather have toast.) I was still a bit hungry, but drat it, there was the school bus and the new care provider! I thought this man would take off after an hour and a half and take my teenage son to his routine O.T. appointment, but no, he was scared and I had to wake up my toddler, pick up my tween after school, and take the care provider with me and all the kids to the appointment. Where my tween began having behavior problems (he has special needs too, but his are more psychiatric) and by the time we got home I was thoroughly stressed from the training and my tween son and really really hungry. Fortunately, I'd warned my husband I'd be late and what we could throw together for dinner and he had the burger makings about ready for the grill. By the time we sat down, my tween son had had a major meltdown and things were very tense at the picnic table. Somehow I managed to stay aware and

stop myself from overeating, but my son had ruined my pleasure and nothing tasted particularly good and it was just a chore and a strain to eat and not overeat. And now it's hours later, after yet more drama from my tween, and I am feeling annoyed that I'm not quite hungry again, because I feel like I deserve dessert after such a crappy day, now that the kids are in bed finally finally finally! Actually, I'm getting the first signs and will probably be hungry enough to know when to stop if I start within an hour, which should just barely make it before bed. But this was not an optimal day with IE. However, I do think I did well nevertheless. It just wasn't peaceful and stress-free and I didn't enjoy my food.

Jane